Earn cash as you plan. Get a $20 gift card for every 200 points with The Knot Rewards
Wedding Etiquette Forum
To add to the list of "and guest" questions...
I am getting ready to put out the STD's, and I would like to get as many thoughts/opinons regarding who does and does not get a guest.
The initial guidelines my fiance and I agreed upon as far as who does get to bring a guest included: married couples, engaged couples, single guests in a serious bf/gf relationship (they can determine "serious", but ideally having gone out for more than a couple months), and anyone in the wedding party. The only exception I was willing to make was for any single person who wouldn't know anyone else at the wedding.
My FIL's included a guest spot for my FSIL who is not in a relationship (and she is not in the WP). I feel torn because she is my FSIL and part of me feels fine with allowing her a guest, but I also don't want to create unnecessary drama with other single people who won't be allowed to bring a guest. Although then there's the risk of tension with the IL's.
Thoughts?
The initial guidelines my fiance and I agreed upon as far as who does get to bring a guest included: married couples, engaged couples, single guests in a serious bf/gf relationship (they can determine "serious", but ideally having gone out for more than a couple months), and anyone in the wedding party. The only exception I was willing to make was for any single person who wouldn't know anyone else at the wedding.
My FIL's included a guest spot for my FSIL who is not in a relationship (and she is not in the WP). I feel torn because she is my FSIL and part of me feels fine with allowing her a guest, but I also don't want to create unnecessary drama with other single people who won't be allowed to bring a guest. Although then there's the risk of tension with the IL's.
Thoughts?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: To add to the list of "and guest" questions...
Planning Bio
Married 9/15/11
*This is Not Legal Advice*
[QUOTE]I am getting ready to put out the STD's, and I would like to get as many thoughts/opinons regarding who does and does not get a guest. The initial guidelines my fiance and I agreed upon as far as who does get to bring a guest included: married couples, engaged couples, single guests in a serious bf/gf relationship (they can determine "serious", but ideally having gone out for more than a couple months), and anyone in the wedding party. The only exception I was willing to make was for any single person who wouldn't know anyone else at the wedding. My FIL's included a guest spot for my FSIL who is not in a relationship (and she is not in the WP). I feel torn because she is my FSIL and part of me feels fine with allowing her a guest, but I also don't want to create unnecessary drama with other single people who won't be allowed to bring a guest. Although then there's the risk of tension with the IL's. Thoughts?
Posted by klokowac[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>You're only sending out STD's. Just send them out to the person invited, with no mention of a guest. If the couple is married, engaged, living together, or just definitely serious then put the SO's name, but for single people or people newly dating don't make any mention of a guest.</div><div>
</div><div>If you do end up giving a guest to the FSIL I don't think it will matter and people won't question it. For all the know she is seriously dating someone. But at the same time, if she is surrounded by family why does she need a guest?
</div>
[QUOTE]I would treat immediately family as if they were members of the wedding party and make an exception.
Posted by Celles[/QUOTE]
I agree with this. I plan to give all my siblings, as well as FI's brother, a plus-one, even if they're not seeing anyone seriously at the time of the wedding. Besides, as dnbeach said, most guests aren't even going to realize the difference. I've never gone to a wedding where I spent any time sizing up which of the other guests had plus-ones. And anyone who knows your FSIL well enough to know she's not in a serious relationship with her guest, will know her well enough to know she's immediate family of the groom. I think you're okay.
If it were me, though, I'd be giving a +1 to my FSIL regardless of her relationship status. Being a sister of your FI, in my opinion, should give her at least as high of status as being in the wedding party.
As for the FSIL, I think allowing her a guest would probably be in your best interest to keep the "peace" in the family. I'm not a good one to talk though cuz FI and I aren't allowing his brother a plus one since his "gf" is more of the type of bachelor party entertainment (if you catch my drift.)