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What do you do when...?

yellow_graceyellow_grace
First Comment
in Pennsylvania-Central
I am starting to get RSVPs back (yea!)I did not invite any children (except my own:) John's uncle and wife were invited (specifically addressed as Mr. and Mrs. X without "and family" or the kids names).They RSVPed for themselves and their 3 children (who happen to be very poorly behaved kids!)I am not opposed to the kids coming down and having a sitter and pizza and letting them hang out, but I really don't want them at the wedding. They were not awesome at FI's sister's wedding last year, and I doubt they are going to be awesome now. However, knowing John's aunt, she will not do this (she never leaves her kids with a sitter- doesn't even put them into the nursery at church! They are now ages 11, 8, and 6, and the baby has NEVER been away from her parents- there is always at least one of them with her!)How do you handle something like this? Especially because I am NOT paying for an adult entree for these kids!
grace

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Re: What do you do when...?

  • MrsHarris2010MrsHarris2010 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    idk if i was you i would try and find a polite way to say that the wedding is adults only.
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  • tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Your FH calls his uncle and says, "I'm so sorry. There must have been some sort of misunderstanding, but we're not having kids at the wedding. Sorry for any confusion, but we need to confirm if you guys will still be coming without the kids." His apology might help smooth things over even though you didn't do a thing wrong! And he does need to be prepared that they might not come at all if their kids can't come since you said they never leave them.
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  • steeser03steeser03
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    ditto pp. we politely told people that children were not invited. i would tell them that your children will be the only in attendance and ask if they will be able to attend without their children since oyu know it is difficult to get childcare. but you do really hope they can join you. and if this becomes a disagreement between you and john and you decide to allow it, is there any option for a kids meal or two? we got chicken fingers and fries for the kids that came to our wedding. 
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  • tiffany*tiffany*
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would make a phone call and very politely explain that due to budgetary constraints you are only able to invite the actual people on your guest list.  It is so rude that people invite themselves... or assume they are invited
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  • vintagefixvintagefix
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh, God! I am dreading this situation! Your FI needs to make a phone call. I'm sure your guests will understand. This problem is waaay too common!
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