little brother in wedding party

Re: little brother in wedding party

• mbcdefg member

  

  November 2009

  The numbers don't need to match.Groomsmen just need to get a tux and show up to the ceremony, so unless the guy whose wedding is the week before yours is unable to get a tux, it should not be a problem for him to be in your wedding. If nobody immediately comes to mind, then you don't have to ask them. The wedding party should be your dearest, closest friends. Not people asked to round out the sides. If you have to talk yourself into asking someone, or if you're racking your brain on who to ask, then that's a sign that you shouldn't ask them. A groomsman is someone who's mature enough to walk down the aisle and stand quietly during the ceremony. If your brother can handle that, then he can absolutely be a groomsman. Or your own attendant on your side. I don't get why it would be "weird." He's a kid, not an alien. What's the problem?If you and your FI want to include him, by all means ask him. If you're only doing it to make the sides even, then don't, because that's not fair to use him (or any other random guy) as a placeholder.

  

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• bablingbrooke member

  

  November 2009

  Well, it has been answered before, but not today I wouldn't worry about symmetry. We had an uneven WP and I promise you the skies did not fall! If you want to include your little brother (which I think is a really good call) you could have him be RB--his role takes about 30 seconds and would mean the WORLD to him. If you really are dead-set against a RB, he could be an usher, bring up the gifts to a nuptial mass, do something. But I'd advocate RB. It would still be a simple and small WP. Having a RB does not mean you also have to have a FG. And if you want to make him a GM, that's totally fine too! He just has to stand there with all the big guys on the day of.

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• tiffspff member

  

  November 2009

  It sounds like your brother really wants to be included, and it'd probably be better for you in the long run if you did include him. He can be a groomsman, theres no age limit or requirement. My 13 year old cousin was a bridesmaid in my wedding, everyone else was older. If you would rather have him be a ring bearer and he's okay with that, it would be a good role for him too. You don't have to have 2 groomsmen just because you have 2 bridesmaids.

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• nuremenosh member

  

  November 2009

  I think its a good idea to have him as a groomsman.

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• lalap69 member

  

  November 2009

  I'd make him a groomsman.  He's your brother and it's important to him and I imagine that he is important to you.Also, while I agree that sides don't have to be even, I really like the symmetry of you asking each other's siblings.  It's like a symbolic merging of your families!

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• megk8oz member

  

  November 2009

  Honestly the only real difference between him being an RB or a GM is whether or not he'd be walking down the aisle with a pillow.

  
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• arenkay member

  

  November 2009

  thanks for the advice. I really do want him to be in the wedding. I just didn't want him to be ring bearer because he sort of thinks its a "baby" job and he wants to be with the big boys, lol. He will be 11 by then so he absolutely can stand quietly for our (hopefully short) ceremony. I guess I thought it would be weird for him to walk down the aisle with my fiance's 19 year old sister who is a foot taller than he is (not that it would look bad in pics- I would want my brother in my pics anyway!!) but that it would be sort of unfair to her to get "stuck with" him instead of an adult partner, if that makes sense. She is inviting her boyfriend, so its not like she would have to dance with him all night, haha. But I don't know, I am clueless about wedding party etiquette. I would like to have my brother sit at the table with me and my sister, who will talk to him, rather than get stuck with my parents listening to "adults" chitchat. I am happy to hear people say that it should be fine, as I really am super excited about including him, and my fiance is too, as he is almost like a little brother to him as well.

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