P&E, tell me what to do. I talked to one of my bridesmaids last night and I was sort of put in an awkward position. I'm not sure if I gave her the right advice, and I figure you all will set me straight. So said bm (who is my brother's gf) tells me she has no money and is being asked to contribute to a shower. She is shy and although she knows most of the other girls, isn't comfortable telling them that she's broke. I got the distinct impression that she wanted me to tell them to not ask her for money. Now, I have been in exactly her situation before, so I just told her what I did, which is let the MOH, or someone else in the WP, know that I was broke and could contribute a set dollar amount or contribute in another way (cooking, decorating, etc.) I also let her know that she didn't have to contribute and that no one would be offended if she just said "hey, I can't do it." Should I have offered to tell the other bridesmaids that she couldn't help and so not to ask her? This seems like it would be rude and also presumptious, even though I know they're planning a shower. But I also don't want her to be uncomfortable. Cliffs Notes: BM has no cash and I'm pretty sure she wants me to tell the shower-planners so they don't ask her to contribute. I sort of declined, but made sure she knew that she didn't have to chip in.