Flower girl same height as the bride… looks odd?

luvreddaisies · December 2010

I’m planning on having my niece to be my flower girl. She’s 10 and she’s almost as tall as I am. She’s also a little wider than I am. I’d love for her to be part of the wedding and she would be devastated if she’s not but I just feel a little funny that she’s my height and bigger than I am. Has anybody encounter this situation before? So let’s say, she’s my flower girl, should I have her wear a white dress or the bridesmaid’s color? If she wears white and she’s my height, wouldn’t that look weird in photos?

Erica1011 · December 2010

I do think the white dress would look weird in photos since you two are the same height. Why don't you make her a Jr. Bridesmaid? She could wear the same color as the bridesmaids but a different dress. I def think you should include her but maybe "flower girl" isnt the way to go.

ChrislovesBarry · December 2010

My neice was a JR. Bridesmaid when she was 10 at my Brother's wedding. She didn't fit into flowergirl dresses. It was a nice promotion for her. She walked just behind their other Flowergirl and ring bearer.

trix1223 · December 2010

Bridesmaid. (There's really no need for the JR. title, as she's doing exactly what the other BMs are doing.)

Or FG but in a color other than white.

Vanessarf07 · December 2010

I was at my friend's wedding and her now step-daughter was the "flower girl". She walked down before the bridesmaids and had on a white dress, but it has a sash around it in black (same color as the BMs dresses). I would say if you think it is going to look odd in the pictures, just have her wear a different color of dress.

luvreddaisies · December 2010

For my niece to be a BM instead of a FG, I would have to get another girl in to be a FG and I think that would make her feel that the new FG steals her thunder. And I think she would be really hurt by that. I am torn... I'm not really sure what to do :-\

aerinpegadrak · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_flower-girl-same-height-bride-looks-odd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:06edf5ef-b30e-43b3-87ed-869bdcc504f7Post:33aeef9d-debe-4732-8cef-b799e95cb39f">Re: Flower girl same height as the bride… looks odd?</a>:
[QUOTE]For my niece to be a BM instead of a FG, I would have to get another girl in to be a FG and I think that would make her feel that the new FG steals her thunder. And I think she would be really hurt by that. I am torn... I'm not really sure what to do :-\
Posted by luvreddaisies[/QUOTE]
Why? You don't have to have a flower girl at all. Seems like more weddings skip them than have them these days.

stephasuasu · December 2010

Please don't put a 10 year old in a bridesmaid dress made for a woman! It looks so ridiculous! My flower girl was 11. I was in no way shape of form going to have her wear a long flowing gown like my maids. I let her mother and her pick out any dress she wanted. She found one with a sash that matched the color of the bridesmaids dress at house of brides. If your niece is excited to play this role in your wedding, then let her! It will be fun for her and she will never forget being in your wedding. Don't let her size worry you!

Jessieleigh316 · December 2010

10 seems kind of old for a flowergirl... I would def promote her to jr bridesmaid. She's old enough to be psyched to get to be one of the grown ups anyway... But I agree not to put her in a full-out woman's dress... if their dresses are a little old for her, put her in something similar but a little sweeter.

trix1223 · December 2010

why would you have to get another FG? They're not needed at all-their sole function is to be cute, after all.

sister2groom · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_flower-girl-same-height-bride-looks-odd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:06edf5ef-b30e-43b3-87ed-869bdcc504f7Post:bd2a703d-7820-4ef6-886b-abbb1e8a42a1">Re: Flower girl same height as the bride… looks odd?</a>:
[QUOTE]Please don't put a 10 year old in a bridesmaid dress made for a woman! It looks so ridiculous!
Posted by stephasuasu[/QUOTE]

She doesn't need to have an adult BM dress to be a BM (or Jr. BM). It can just be in the same color.

OP: Just have her be a BM (or, if you must, add Jr. to her title) in an age-appropriate dress the same color as the other BMs. You don't need a FG. If you want scattered rose petals down the aisle, you can still list her as a BM but have her scatter the flowers on her way down instead of the bouquet. I think she'd enjoy standing up at the front during the ceremony, I know that would have made me feel adult and special when I was 10.

AutumnEnchantment · December 2010

I wouldn't worry about her size any more than you're worried about your own, the bridesmaids, the groomsmen, the groom, the minister, etc etc etc.

zitiqueen · December 2010

I vote bridesmaid (and none of this junior nonsense -- would you call somebody a senior bridesmaid?) She'll be thrilled to be included with the older girls.

lalap69 · December 2010

1) Being a FG does not necessitate wearing white. She could wear a coloured dress.

2) She might be too old to be a FG, in which case make her a BM. It's not necessary to specify that she's Jr.

3) You don't need to find a replacement FG. I promise your marriage will still be valid without one.

Lisa50 · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_flower-girl-same-height-bride-looks-odd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:06edf5ef-b30e-43b3-87ed-869bdcc504f7Post:44b4f25c-b833-4ff1-b30a-79897b387044">Re: Flower girl same height as the bride… looks odd?</a>:
[QUOTE]I wouldn't worry about her size any more than you're worried about your own, the bridesmaids, the groomsmen, the groom, the minister, etc etc etc.
Posted by AutumnEnchantment[/QUOTE]

I hope she doesn't catch on that you're concerned about her size -- height or width (you wrote "wider" in your OP, right?) or weight. That could be devastating for a 10 year old. Jr. Bridesmaid is the way to go, if you want her in the wedding. There are a lot of options for pre-teen dress styles you can find in colors that would coordinate with the bridesmaids.

Good luck!

luvreddaisies · December 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_flower-girl-same-height-bride-looks-odd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:06edf5ef-b30e-43b3-87ed-869bdcc504f7Post:bd2a703d-7820-4ef6-886b-abbb1e8a42a1">Re: Flower girl same height as the bride… looks odd?</a>:
[QUOTE]Please don't put a 10 year old in a bridesmaid dress made for a woman! It looks so ridiculous! My flower girl was 11. I was in no way shape of form going to have her wear a long flowing gown like my maids. I let her mother and her pick out any dress she wanted. She found one with a sash that matched the color of the bridesmaids dress at house of brides. If your niece is excited to play this role in your wedding, then let her! It will be fun for her and she will never forget being in your wedding. Don't let her size worry you!
Posted by stephasuasu[/QUOTE]

No need to worry about my 10-year old niece in an adult BM’s dress. I’d like to think I have more sense than to put a 10-year old girl in a "long flowing gown." Thanks ladies for all of your input! Cheers J

reason00 · December 2010

Since when is 10 too old for a flower girl? Seems like the flower girls are becomig younger and younger. I should start the new trend of having a 6 month old crawl down with a rose in her mouth. Just let her be the flower girl. Or ask if she'd prefer bridesmaid.

courtney1188 · December 2010

I say make her a jr. bridesmaid and don't have a flower girl. This is what I did with my cousin. And for the person who commented on bridesmaid dresses looking weird on 10 year olds, they do make junior bridesmaid dresses that kind of flower between fg and bm.

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