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Arizona-Phoenix

How do I not invite kids?

Hello- I hate to be rude, but I have very limited seating and the venue is not child friendly.... (by a large body of water, lots of stairs, only a few feet rom a busy street...) How do I make it clear that no children are invited? And what is a good age limit to set? I was thinking 12??!! Any thoughts? Thank you!! Christine

Re: How do I not invite kids?

  • sms274sms274 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm not having children at my wedding either. I would suggest wording the reception part of the invite something like Adult reception to follow and then be sure you don't write "Smith Family" or a grouping of names on the invite anywhere or they will still assume children are allowed. I think 12 is a good age limit - I I am going with 13 and older.
  • edited December 2011
    Not sure how you're doing invitations, but generally the inner envelope states exactly who is invited. Although if you're not doing inner envelopes, you can always write the names of those invited on the main outer envelope. If you want to get super technical with the etiquette, nothing should be written on the invite to indicate that children are not welcome. However, I've seen "adult reception" on invites or reception cards (as the PP said) and wasn't offended, it's up to you. Although, "adult reception" doesn't indicate that a 12-year old is welcome and a 3-year old is not. Again, *technically*, this information should be spread via word of mouth (moms, aunts, bridesmaids, etc.). What we did to make it crystal clear who was invited and who was not was to print (or write - depends on your invites) the names of those invitees on the RSVP card, next to the decline/accept and meal choice indicators. It worked, and we had only one question about kids being able to come, and it was explained by DH's mom that they were not invited. Granted, we had custom DIY invites, but it made for much less of a headache than I anticipated.
  • firefox0402firefox0402 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Was it time consuming to individually address the responder card? Im thinking of having the invitations done by a company, and the individualization isnt really an option...... but no reason why I cant make the respinder cards myself....?...
  • sms274sms274 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh my gosh! I LOVE your RSVP card thought, we are actually not allowing guests unless married or seriously dating because the majority of our guests are all good friends and know each other (obviously we have to make an exception or two for the ones who do not) and I couldn't figure out how to make this clear in the invites (I have heard people still assume a guest is allowed even if the inner envelope is only to them. I was thinking about printing two separate cards, one for single attendees and one for with guest, but this is a great idea to leave it without question.
  • sms274sms274 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    do you have a picture of your RSVP card as example you could send just so I can get a visual of it? If so you can email me at sms274 at gmail.com
  • edited December 2011
    The "proper" way to not invite kids is to address invitations to "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" and make no mention of the children.  You have every right to invite whoever you want to your wedding, but also realize that people will be upset they can't bring their kids, especially close family members.  See the second post on this recent "Dear Prudence" advice column: http://www.slate.com/id/2235064/.   Our venue really tried to discourage kids because of the water features, cacti, uneven ground, but the kids were a really fun part of the wedding. 
  • edited December 2011
    Let me look and see if I have a photo, if not, I'll email you the general idea of how it was set up. It didn't take a terribly long time once we had everything set up the way we wanted it, it was just a matter of typing in (and proofreading) the names.
  • edited December 2011
    sms...YGM!
  • sms274sms274 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    This is SO HELPFUL! Thank you :)
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