parent dance ideas

deedle512 · January 2012

My fiance and I are getting married (just us) in the dominican republic and then coming home and having a formal reception a week later. Both sets of our parents are still married and we are both close to both of them. I know that my dad is a little sad that he won't be walking me down the "aisle" but we decided that a church wedding just wasn't for us and we wanted to have this be a private moment between us (we've been together for 9 years). So I guess I have several questions here and this is part 1.
1) Any ideas on how I can do something special for the reception for my dad to make up for him not walking me down the aisle?

Now, when we do the parent dances, our idea was to find 1 song that would be fitting for both parents, then I would dance with my dad and him with his mom. After that, I would hand my dad off to my mom and he would hand his mom off to his dad and the 6 of us would dance to another song. Does this seem okay? Anyone done anything similar? We wanted to involve all parents but didn't want overkill with parent dances because I've been to weddings where people stop paying attention. Also, any song suggestions for this scenario? Thanks!!

toothpastechica · January 2012

can't beleive you didnt invite your parents to your ceremony!! Your dad has every right to feel slighted! I understand small but eloping and then throwing a huge party?? To what tell ur guests they are only worth the party but not important enough to be witnesses at the ceremony? I can understand the small wedding thing (just family or something at the ceremony), but eloping and then throwing a party and calling it a reception and trying to make it look like a reception im not sure about.

Regardless you are going to do it, and having said that i think that if you are doing a first dance, the way you are doing it sounds fine.

TiffannieF · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_parent-dance-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:79164458-eba2-466e-81a0-de8e0264c9daPost:563fcd85-dec6-4897-b3eb-7b0fa6e57d7e">Re: parent dance ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]can't beleive you didnt invite your parents to your ceremony!! Your dad has every right to feel slighted! I understand small but eloping and then throwing a huge party??<strong> To what tell ur guests they are only worth the party but not important enough to be witnesses at the ceremony? </strong>I can understand the small wedding thing (just family or something at the ceremony), but eloping and then throwing a party and calling it a reception and trying to make it look like a reception im not sure about. Regardless you are going to do it, and having said that i think that if you are doing a first dance, the way you are doing it sounds fine.
Posted by toothpastechica[/QUOTE]

I don't think this is a problem....many people elope then have a reception later on. Some people can't afford it all (ceremony and reception) so they elope or have DW wedding then have a reception later on.

OP, your idea sounds fine. I don't have any song recommendations other than "The way you look tonight". Maybe talk to your dad...I know my dad would have been very hurt if I didn't do a special father/daughter dance with him. Especially since your already taking his moment of giving his daughter away I would ask him if its important to skip the father/daughter dance as well (or share it).

deedle512 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_parent-dance-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:79164458-eba2-466e-81a0-de8e0264c9daPost:563fcd85-dec6-4897-b3eb-7b0fa6e57d7e">Re: parent dance ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]can't beleive you didnt invite your parents to your ceremony!! Your dad has every right to feel slighted! I understand small but eloping and then throwing a huge party?? To what tell ur guests they are only worth the party but not important enough to be witnesses at the ceremony? I can understand the small wedding thing (just family or something at the ceremony), but eloping and then throwing a party and calling it a reception and trying to make it look like a reception im not sure about. Regardless you are going to do it, and having said that i think that if you are doing a first dance, the way you are doing it sounds fine.
Posted by toothpastechica[/QUOTE]

I am sorry that I have offended you with my wedding plans. My intention in posting in this forum was to ask advice, not be lectured.. The decision has been made and the questions I asked were regarding the dances. If I must explain, I have never made any decisions in my life that were actually based upon what I wanted - I always put other people first. So, when it comes to my cermony with my fiance, I wanted it to just be the two of us. There are 5 other family weddings next summer, with his sister getting married a few days before we leave for our trip. We have been together almost 9 years and are ready to get married; however, we cannot constantly work around everyone else's plans. It is actually quite common for couples to get married abroad and have a reception when they return. If I should not call it a reception, what should it be called then? Frankly, we wanted to be able to celebrate with our over 350 guests and not stress out about the logistics of a ceremony. And the guests will be witnessing our ceremony when we show the video and pictures of it at our reception. This way is money and time-saving and it is the way we want it. If I did invite my parents to our ceremony, they could not come. My mom and sister have anxiety and cannot fly and they also probably could not afford to bring the entire family on the trip. My dad does not feel slighted, we just wanted to make sure that we still upheld some of the traditions since we are not having a traditional ceremony and I was asking for advice. Also, many couples who have had large ceremonies have told us, "don't do it, it's too stressful," and the couples I know that did what we are doing have told us, "it was the best day ever, no stress."

deedle512 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_parent-dance-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:79164458-eba2-466e-81a0-de8e0264c9daPost:388f6aa8-5076-4ff1-8d88-354103729ba4">Re: parent dance ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: parent dance ideas : I don't think this is a problem....many people elope then have a reception later on. Some people can't afford it all (ceremony and reception) so they elope or have DW wedding then have a reception later on. OP, your idea sounds fine. I don't have any song recommendations other than "The way you look tonight". Maybe talk to your dad...I know my dad would have been very hurt if I didn't do a special father/daughter dance with him. Especially since your already taking his moment of giving his daughter away I would ask him if its important to skip the father/daughter dance as well (or share it).
Posted by TiffannieF[/QUOTE]

Thanks. It would be too pricy for us to have both a ceremony, reception, and honeymoon, so by combining the honeymoon and ceremony (the ceremony is free at our resort), we are saving money so we can have the reception that we want. I like that song idea and I will talk to my dad. We are definitely doing the dance, I just really want to find the right song!! And after reading your post, I really think that it needs to be a dance with just the two of us so that we don't share that moment with anyone else - we will just as many parent dances as we need and if people get bored they can hit up the bar ;)

Sydney91 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_parent-dance-ideas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:79164458-eba2-466e-81a0-de8e0264c9daPost:388f6aa8-5076-4ff1-8d88-354103729ba4">Re: parent dance ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: parent dance ideas : <strong>I don't think this is a problem....many people elope then have a reception later on</strong>. Some people can't afford it all (ceremony and reception) so they elope or have DW wedding then have a reception later on. OP, your idea sounds fine. I don't have any song recommendations other than "The way you look tonight". Maybe talk to your dad...I know my dad would have been very hurt if I didn't do a special father/daughter dance with him. Especially since your already taking his moment of giving his daughter away I would ask him if its important to skip the father/daughter dance as well (or share it).
Posted by TiffannieF[/QUOTE]
Agreed. Several couples I know married in a courtroom and had a party at a later date. Not a problem.

parent dance ideas

Re: parent dance ideas

Choose Another Board

Search Boards