My BMs are REALLY laid back.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · January 2010

I haz an actual question. :-)

I would like to go with my BMs to try on dresses soon. I sent out an email last Friday asking what Saturday in February worked well for them. One told me she got the email, one asked if we could do a choreographed WP dance (no), and the third I didn't hear from. So... basically no one suggested a date. SHE is the one who has a crazy work schedule and might need to request it off.

I emailed them again yesterday and said basically, "So... how about the 20th?" BM #3 texted me about something this morning, but hasn't mentioned it yet. She and I have plans for the afternoon of February 20th, so if she is requesting work off all day, I figured we could go dress shopping in the morning.

I figure I wait a week and then...? Send a text or call each individually to confirm? I do not want to be 'zilla like, especially since my wedding is 8 months away. I've already told them they can have any hair/makeup/shoes/jewelry they want. And I'm paying for their dresses. I just need to see which one they pick and get their measurements so I can order them.

Thanks in advance, ladies.

stina93446 · January 2010

Why not try to set up individual dates? Or not worry about 3rd bridesmaid and just have her figure it out herself? Go with whoever wants to go with you and see what looks good on THOSE girls. Pick out a few styles and then tell bm #3 "hey, we like dress snap, dress crackle, and dress pop. Please try them on. Take pictures if you can and tell me which one you like the most."

MyNameIsNot · January 2010

Are you set on matching dresses, or are you leaning to different dresses in the same line? If it's the latter, you can tell them to shop on their own.

I think this one of those things where a phone call really helps. I'd call the 3rd and ask her about the 20th and maybe pick another date that works for her. Then ask the other girls specifically "can you come on the 20th?"

I feel you. My friends are like hearding cats. I eventually went shopping with two and then emailed the rest with some options.

SteveandKris · January 2010

I went with just my sister and cousin and hearing just those *two* opinions were overwhelming... are you sure you want all 3 at once?

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · January 2010

Good advice. Stina, BM #3 is probably the pickiest of the BMs. She has BRIGHT red hair and pale skin, so she's very sensitive about which shades of which colors she can wear. She also happens to be the most laid back and not over-the-top girly. I've settled on brown dresses (there is no way she'd go for any shade of red) and I'd like to see what she thinks of the colors in person. I also think if I don't go with her, she never will. The BM who asked about the dance is a tiny little brunette who would wear anything and not care!

Call me selfish, but I do really want them in the same dress. I'm going for cocktail length and don't care about anything else. I figure this is the ONLY matching thing I'm insisting on and I'm paying, so it isn't really a big deal to not let them choose individual styles. I'm still having them give me input.

stina93446 · January 2010

Ok, I'd set a seperate appointment up for her. If she's the pickiest, you may want her to be by herself and not around the other girls. Also, if you're paying, she should probably try and suck it up.

bablingbrooke · January 2010

Were they always this laid back about things? And/or are they more "spur of the moment" people who don't typically plan things out a month in advance?

I don't think there's any harm in calling them to firm things up. You'd do that about any other plans, right? That's not bridezilla at all. A bridezilla move would be screaming that they're "ruining your wedding" by not responding quickly to this and coming here to ask how to boot them in favor of more "reliable" BMs

aerinpegadrak · January 2010

I think it's always easier to shop with the girl who's most difficult for whatever reason, and then let the others follow suit. Let BM #3 pick out X number of dresses she's okay with, and then let the other two choose between them.

My BMs are REALLY laid back.

Re: My BMs are REALLY laid back.

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