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Wedding Etiquette Forum
"I don't know how it gets better than this. You take my hand and lead me head first - Fearless"
How do you tell an EXTENDED FAMILY MEMBER they're not invited?
Okay so it goes like this:
Very dysfunctional family. Never really felt close with my dad's side of the family when I was younger ANYWAY, dad had to leave when I was 12, haven't seen or talked to him since I was 16 (for my own reasons).
Fast forward to now. Thanks to Facebook, I've gotten in touch with some old family members. Of course today is 1 year to the day until my wedding
And I posted as such on Facebook how excited I was. My cousin (dad's sister's daughter, who besides being friendly on Facebook I haven't seen or talked to in years) says in reply "does your cuzzin get an invite??? (We are the normal ones, I promise)"
Small wedding (50-60 people tops!) and FI and I pretty much have it set that this person was not even coming because we're keeping it to super immediate family and super close friends only...
How do I address this without offending her?
Very dysfunctional family. Never really felt close with my dad's side of the family when I was younger ANYWAY, dad had to leave when I was 12, haven't seen or talked to him since I was 16 (for my own reasons).
Fast forward to now. Thanks to Facebook, I've gotten in touch with some old family members. Of course today is 1 year to the day until my wedding
And I posted as such on Facebook how excited I was. My cousin (dad's sister's daughter, who besides being friendly on Facebook I haven't seen or talked to in years) says in reply "does your cuzzin get an invite??? (We are the normal ones, I promise)"Small wedding (50-60 people tops!) and FI and I pretty much have it set that this person was not even coming because we're keeping it to super immediate family and super close friends only...
How do I address this without offending her?
"I don't know how it gets better than this. You take my hand and lead me head first - Fearless"
This discussion has been closed.
Re: How do you tell an EXTENDED FAMILY MEMBER they're not invited?
Very dysfunctional family. Never really felt close with my dad's side of the family when I was younger ANYWAY, dad had to leave when I was 12, haven't seen or talked to him since I was 16 (for my own reasons).
Fast forward to now. Thanks to Facebook, I've gotten in touch with some old family members. Of course today is 1 year to the day until my wedding
Small wedding (50-60 people tops!) and FI and I pretty much have it set that this person was not even coming because we're keeping it to super immediate family and super close friends only...
How do I address this without offending her?
"I don't know how it gets better than this. You take my hand and lead me head first - Fearless"
And avoid posting about your wedding on FB unless everyone there is invited.
"You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
But that's just me. Go with Moose's response.
Now with more wedded bliss.
I don't get married often, but when I do, I do it in Las Vegas.
"Lvharpy could be your AE." - direy25
"smokeybailey is the one shining beacon of light in this steaming turd of a thread." - daffodil_jill
"The almighty smokeybailey has spoken." - some bitch on the Las Vegas board
I have this same problem with my dad's side of the family. None of them really cared about me growing up and never came to any graduation parties, birthdays, etc. Except now they're all like "i love and miss you!" on Facebook. Right. I bet you do. Not enough to call me though, right? They won't be getting an invite from me.
[QUOTE]"We haven't finalized our guest list yet." And avoid posting about your wedding on FB unless everyone there is invited.
Posted by wadingmoose[/QUOTE]
That would be great if it didn't sound extremely cold. I'd message your cousin and be straight with her...something like, "We're only inviting a handful of our closest friends and family due to financial constraints." Unless you know you can invite her, DON'T make her think she *might* be invited. You're better off being honest and rekindling the friendship/family relationship without allowing your wedding to be the "jumping off" point for this.
Ditto the PPs that said to just let her know you haven't finalized the guest list, but you're planning on inviting close friends and immediate family only.
planning
[QUOTE]Okay so it goes like this: Very dysfunctional family. Never really felt close with my dad's side of the family when I was younger ANYWAY, dad had to leave when I was 12, haven't seen or talked to him since I was 16 (for my own reasons). Fast forward to now. Thanks to Facebook, I've gotten in touch with some old family members. Of course today is 1 year to the day until my wedding :) And I posted as such on Facebook how excited I was. My cousin (dad's sister's daughter, who besides being friendly on Facebook I haven't seen or talked to in years) says in reply "does your cuzzin get an invite??? (We are the normal ones, I promise)" Small wedding (50-60 people tops!) and FI and I pretty much have it set that this person was not even coming because we're keeping it to super immediate family and super close friends only... How do I address this without offending her?
Posted by Karebear852k3[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I had a similar situation recently. I too (in my excitement) made a facebook status about something wedding related. I had a friend of mine tell me via facebook that she was so excited to come down for our wedding and was working on convincing her husband to make the trip. This friend is a woman who lives in a different state who I've seen once in the past 3 years and only speak with via facebook every so often. I just sent her a message explaining we were trying to keep it small and even with our immediate family we were having guest list issues. She took it really well and totally understood.
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