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change of plans... freaking out

kirab2kirab2 member
100 Comments
in Pennsylvania-Philadelphia
Hi ladies!  My FI and I had originally decided on a Sept 2013 wedding.  His mom is ill with cancer, she has been battling it for over 20 years.  3 years ago she was diagnosed with bone cancer and was told she had about 2 years to live.  She is stong and for the most part has been doing well, but she also has a brain tumor.  She is currently in the hospital because she passed out over the weekend and they think it is something going on in the brain.  She has told my FI that she cant go through another brain surgery, so the outcome might not be too good. He suspects she wont live another 2 years. 
So we are moving up our wedding date to sept 2012.  I am freaking out a little bit because I havent done anything yet, we dont have the money saved, I have about 40 lbs I want to lose before I even attempt dress shopping.  We were looking to spend about 30k on the wedding and now I am thinking realistically we need to knock that number down to 20k. 

I want an outside venue for about 80 people.  The places I like are morris arboretum, waynesborough, bolingbroke mansion and glen foerd mansion.

Does anybody have any experience with these places? 

What are some ways to cut down the budget?  Where can we cut costs?  I am not too creative and work full time and we have 3 kids between us so there isnt really a DIY option...

If I want to buy a designer dress, what is the latest I can realistically order the dress?

Thanks in advance ladies, you are always very helpful!!
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Re: change of plans... freaking out

  • meghantighemeghantighe
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I got married at Glen Foerd Mansion and loved it.  Everything there went perfectly.  In terms of budgeting its nice because their packages are pretty all inclusive, so you will end up with enough for an amazing night without having to add additional thigns on.  Also we did the ceremony outside, and the area is really nicely landscapped.  While we did add some extra flowers, if you were looking for a way to cut costs this would be a good option because you wouldn't need any ceremony flowers.
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  • rachelk456rachelk456
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    So sorry to hear about your future mother-in-law. My own mother is a cancer survivor and I could not imagine losing her.

    You have good taste! I haven't been to any of those venues but they look very nice. I've heard good things about Glen Foerd. Like PP said, it's helpful to have a venue that is already so pretty to cut back on floral/decoration costs.

    I would look at and book venues ASAP. You're fine on time except venues can book pretty fast and September is a very popular month. I saved money by having my wedding on a Sunday. It was actually 4th of July weekend, so it was nice that most people had off the next day anyway. Fridays work the same way. 

    I had a designer dress that I ordered about 9 months before my wedding. I don't think I could have waited too much longer and had it in time, but I think it depends on the designer and bridal salon. Sometimes you can buy the sample off the rack, and that will be cheaper and you can wait longer to get it. Usually sample dresses are size 10.

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  • paprika28paprika28
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Look at priscilla of boston right now for your dress. They're closing, so you'll get a killer deal on the dress!
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  • kirab2kirab2 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    thanks for the responses ladies.  I am afraid to try on dresses now because I am not happy with how I look. before the date change i had already started my weight loss program. But im afraid i will be totally discouraged if i do it now.  i am holding onto baby weight that i NEED to lose. do you know when the store is closing?

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  • nancyrnancyr member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    What kind of dress are you looking for? might help us give you some ideas.  The store (Priscillas) is closing in December but they're only selling what's in stock as far as I can tell from their website.  If you can't get Glen Foerd etc. Try Ridley Creek Mansion, the main problem is you really probably want to hire a coordinator to take care of all the rentals etc because they aren't known for being great at it, and if you're the bride you deserve a day w/out stressors like that.  There are a lot of colonial homes in Fairmont Park, and check w/the local historical societies etc. for other options. 
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