Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws

Lesleya34 · September 2011

Hey ladies:

need a litle assistance. My Fiance is a Big 1/2 brother ( His dad remarried a few years ago). Because the kids ( Flower Girl age 6 and RB age 3) look up to him we wanted to include them in the ceremony.

I can't find FG dresses I love. I realize the cost from David's Bridal is about 75-150 for a dress. and LadyBug Designs are BEAUTIFUL but about 250 so, my solution was to have a friend with an ETSY.com shop actually make the FG a dress out of similar fabric as my dress for $150.00 falling into the Normal range of cost.

I explained this to a cousin on his side and she was SHOCKED at the cost for a dres that FG will literally never wear again........
Clearly we expect the parents (his dad and step-mom) to foot the cost as they ARE NOT CONTRIBUTING in any other way for our day.
Am I out of line ?

Help!

Simply Fated · September 2011

If you can pay, that's great, but if you want the parents to pay, then they get to choose the budget. Ask them how much they are willing to pay for a dress and work within that budget. GL!

ehassett · September 2011

Ahh, in-laws and money...so "fun"

Perhaps you should talk to the FG's parents about what price range is acceptable to them. Although unlikely, the cousin may know about financial difficulties that the future in-laws have kept private from you.

In a perfect world, they would of course tell you that there is no price limit. ;-)

But most of all, YOU will be the person that everyone will remember from the wedding. If the FG dress isn't fabulous, she will still get an "aw, how cute" from your guests, and then they will be arching their necks to see you come down the aisle.

Best!

HandBanana · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_flower-girl-dress-cost-pays-cheap-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e54b058e-3104-49ac-86e7-bcc7d4a7217aPost:65b588af-79a7-4cf7-96a9-66809e9a7a4d">Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws</a>:
[QUOTE]Hey ladies: need a litle assistance. My Fiance is a Big 1/2 brother ( His dad remarried a few years ago). Because the kids ( Flower Girl age 6 and RB age 3) look up to him we wanted to include them in the ceremony. I can't find FG dresses I love. I realize the cost from David's Bridal is about 75-150 for a dress. and LadyBug Designs are BEAUTIFUL but about 250 so, my solution was to have a friend with an ETSY.com shop actually make the FG a dress out of similar fabric as my dress for $150.00 falling into the Normal range of cost. I explained this to a cousin on his side and she was SHOCKED at the cost for a dres that FG will literally never wear again........ <strong>Clearly we expect the parents (his dad and step-mom) to foot the cost as they ARE NOT CONTRIBUTING in any other way for our day.</strong> Am I out of line ? Help!
Posted by Lesleya34[/QUOTE]

Yes.

Why should they pay for the FG dress? It is nice of them if they offer to but in no way their responsibility.

That is expensive and maybe you need to start shopping in a budget. Find out what they can afford and if you can help them pay for it and go from there. Try Gymobree, Kids Gap, JCrew crewcuts, Kohls, JCPenneys, Macy's, Nordstrom, etc. It doesn't have to be under a link called "Flower Girl Dresses" to be a flower girl dress.

For the bolded part, your parents have no obligation to pay for any of your wedding. It is nice if they offer but you shouldn't expect it unless they have offered.

Lesleya34 · September 2011

Thank you so much. I appreciate your take on the whole thing. Any dress will be cute and get the 'awe' expression.

I found something cute on Ebay for a very reasonable price.

Lesleya34 · September 2011

@Handbanana :

All ettiquite suggests that the parents of the children pay for the attire. We are paying for the rest of our wedding all by ourseleves for a whopping 10k . Somewhere in there, I know I have some animosity towards them as they do have some cash and refuse to help.

I appreciate the help! I'm looking into your ideas for a cute dress from other stores not listed as "Flower Girl Dress"

Simply Fated · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_flower-girl-dress-cost-pays-cheap-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e54b058e-3104-49ac-86e7-bcc7d4a7217aPost:78cc30f2-e833-4f5f-9ce7-b7afe274686c">Re: Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws</a>:
[QUOTE]@Handbanana : All ettiquite suggests that the parents of the children pay for the attire. We are paying for the rest of our wedding all by ourseleves for a whopping 10k . Somewhere in there, I know I have some animosity towards them as they do have some cash and refuse to help. I appreciate the help! I'm looking into your ideas for a cute dress from other stores not listed as "Flower Girl Dress" :)
Posted by Lesleya34[/QUOTE]
Is your wedding not until September, 2012? If so, you have tons of time. I wouldn't buy the dress yet because, well, kids grow lol. Use this time to your advantage!
If you are looking for a dress that looks like a flower girl dress, but at an inexpensive price, have you considered the clearance racks after Easter? It's much closer to your wedding date. And if you wait even longer, you'll find some fantastic summer dresses that will look like "flower girl" dress, but at less expensive department store prices. I saw some adorable dresses at Kohls two weeks ago on the clearance racks that totally could have passed as the sort of flower girl dress that David's Bridal has.

HandBanana · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_flower-girl-dress-cost-pays-cheap-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e54b058e-3104-49ac-86e7-bcc7d4a7217aPost:78cc30f2-e833-4f5f-9ce7-b7afe274686c">Re: Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws</a>:
[QUOTE]@Handbanana : All ettiquite suggests that the parents of the children pay for the attire. We are paying for the rest of our wedding all by ourseleves for a whopping 10k . Somewhere in there, I know I have some animosity towards them as they do have some cash and refuse to help. I appreciate the help! I'm looking into your ideas for a cute dress from other stores not listed as "Flower Girl Dress" :)
Posted by Lesleya34[/QUOTE]

I just pictured you saying that with your hand on your hip though.

My FG dress was from Gymboree outlet. It had a pink ribbon on it when I got it. I used a seam ripper to remove the pink and put a green ribbon on.

em01092 · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_flower-girl-dress-cost-pays-cheap-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e54b058e-3104-49ac-86e7-bcc7d4a7217aPost:4ab90c2e-83e8-4886-9106-3dec5e24e857">Re: Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws</a>:
[QUOTE]If you can pay, that's great, but if you want the parents to pay, then they get to choose the budget. Ask them how much they are willing to pay for a dress and work within that budget. GL!
Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]

<div>This. </div>

Muffin'sMom · September 2011

Kids GROW!!! A lot! Wait!

We bought the one for my DD's flower girl from Burlington Coat Factory for 30 dollars around Easter. They had dozens of beautiful dresses for less than 50 dollars. We got it a size too big for her October wedding and it barely fit. We should have gotten it 2 sizes too big, but my godchild is a fast grower. The child will wear it one time. It's crazy to spend over 150 dollars on a dress for a 6 year old.

KendallR10 · September 2011

I'm buying ours. and making it the way I want

ElisabethJoanne · September 2011

I rewore a cousin's flowergirl dress a couple times as a princess costume at Halloween.

Agree with everyone else. Wait to buy the dress. Find something at a department or even big box store.

Bonzo2011 · September 2011

I agree with PPs who suggested Easter clearance dresses. That's exactly what I'm planning on doing with my girls. I just don't see the point in buying a $100 dress that the kid will outgrow in a few months.

awick14 · September 2011

if you want her to be your flower girl you need to talk to her parents about the budget first!

I talked to both my sister and my now SIL about there budgets. My sister said $50 and my SIL told me she really can't afford to purchase a dress for her daugther. So she thought the right decision would be to take her daughter out of the wedding party.

I found a dress worth $39.99 fro sears. And me and now H purchased the dress for his neice as the 2 girls already were so excited to be in the wedding and we didn't want to hurt his neices feelings.

We also chose summer dresses that were not very fancy an that they could wear at least once if not a few times at different events through out the summer.

MairePoppy · September 2011

jcpenney.com has 'cinderella dresses' for about $50. They look
very similar to the David's bridal flower girl dresses.
Check department stores after Christmas and Easter for party
and first communion dresses. You should also be able to find
a vest and dress slacks for the little boy at jcpenney or sears
after the holidays.

Usually the parents of the flower girls pay for their dresses.
But you are still obligated to find something within their budgets.
I know you can do it.

try these links
http://www.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?GrpTyp=PRD&ItemID=
194decd&submit%20search.y=7&Ntt=toddler+suits&Search
String=toddler+suits&Ne=4+840+877+878+5+961+6+968+29
+3+598+11+15+12+506+10+23+585+596+963+579+1031+8+
1022+1014+586+1007+879+1027+18+904+903+969+833+949
&hdnOnGo=true&NOffset=0&submit%20search.x=12&Nao=
0&N=4294959029&SO=0&PSO=0&CmCatId=searchresults

http://www.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?GrpTyp=PRD&ItemID=
1d0dafa&Nao=0Ne=4+840+877+878+5+961+6+968+29+3+
598+11+15+12+506+10+23+585+596+963+579+1031+8+1022
+1014+586+1007+879+1027+18+904+903+969+833+949&N
=4294959029&hdnOnGo=true&NOffset=0&Ntt=cinderella+dress&SearchString=cinderella+dress&submit%20search.x=14&
submit%20search.y=10&SO=0&PSO=0&CmCatId=searchresults

sparent2010 · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_flower-girl-dress-cost-pays-cheap-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e54b058e-3104-49ac-86e7-bcc7d4a7217aPost:78cc30f2-e833-4f5f-9ce7-b7afe274686c">Re: Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws</a>:
[QUOTE]@Handbanana : All ettiquite suggests that the parents of the children pay for the attire. We are paying for the rest of our wedding all by ourseleves for a whopping 10k . Somewhere in there, I know I have some animosity towards them as they do have some cash and refuse to help. I appreciate the help! I'm looking into your ideas for a cute dress from other stores not listed as "Flower Girl Dress" :)
Posted by Lesleya34[/QUOTE]

<div>This is a nice thought but it is not a requirement. </div><div>
</div><div>Parents may offer to pay, but you should not expect your parents or FI's parents to fork over the cash b/c you are getting married or they are well off. </div><div>
</div><div>I thought my parents would give me money for my wedding but they have not. My grandmother willed me some money specfically for my wedding. My parents told me they would rather help me and FI put a down payment towards a house. </div><div>
</div><div>You are getting married you should pay for everything. If others offer to help, great. If not plan what you can w/i your budget. This includes attire, tips, favors, decorations- everything. </div>

kmmssg · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_flower-girl-dress-cost-pays-cheap-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:e54b058e-3104-49ac-86e7-bcc7d4a7217aPost:7a552a43-08a7-4a0f-8f46-08e1d4e117e8">Re: Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws : <strong>This is a nice thought but it is not a requirement</strong>. <strong> Parents may offer to pay</strong>, but you should not expect your parents or FI's parents to fork over the cash b/c you are getting married or they are well off. I thought my parents would give me money for my wedding but they have not. My grandmother willed me some money specfically for my wedding. My parents told me they would rather help me and FI put a down payment towards a house. You are getting married you should pay for everything. If others offer to help, great. If not plan what you can w/i your budget. This includes attire, tips, favors, decorations- everything.
Posted by sparent2010[/QUOTE]

Her FIL's are the FG's parents so it is their responsibility to pay for her dress. A 150.00 dress? Heck no, but the FG is their DD so it's their job to pay for her dress.

Sounds like OP has caught on that 150.00 is way out of line.

banana468 · September 2011

Ditto kmmssg. Yes the FG's parents pay for the attire but they pay for attire within THEIR budget and not the OP's.

Soon2BeMrsTing · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_flower-girl-dress-cost-pays-cheap-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:e54b058e-3104-49ac-86e7-bcc7d4a7217aPost:65b588af-79a7-4cf7-96a9-66809e9a7a4d">Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws</a>:
[QUOTE]Hey ladies: need a litle assistance. My Fiance is a Big 1/2 brother ( His dad remarried a few years ago). Because the kids ( Flower Girl age 6 and RB age 3) look up to him we wanted to include them in the ceremony. I can't find FG dresses I love. I realize the cost from David's Bridal is about 75-150 for a dress. and LadyBug Designs are BEAUTIFUL but about 250 so, my solution was to have a friend with an ETSY.com shop actually make the FG a dress out of similar fabric as my dress for $150.00 falling into the Normal range of cost. I explained this to a cousin on his side and she was SHOCKED at the cost for a dres that FG will literally never wear again........ <strong>Clearly we expect the parents (his dad and step-mom) to foot the cost as they ARE NOT CONTRIBUTING in any other way for our day. </strong>Am I out of line ? Help!
Posted by Lesleya34[/QUOTE]

The bolded part makes you appear very entitled.

The fact that his parents are contributing NOTHING is neither here nor there.

Further, that FG dresses even SELL for $150.00 makes me go <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-surprised.gif" border="0" alt="Surprised" title="Surprised" />

Yes, often the parents of the FG and RB will pick up the tab for their child's attire. As Banana said, when this happens, they decide the budget, not the bride or groom.

Our FG's mom found her daughter's dress at JC Penny. I think it was a First Communion dress. We put a royal blue sash on an otherwise plain dress, and FG looked great. Done and done. No fancy designer dress is ever necessary, and especially not for a young girl who won't fit into it for long.

a80Lady · September 2011

If you are at all open to different styles, you can try looking at Dillard's. I have 3 flower girls and bought their dresses on sale for $30 each. They are just as nice as any of the others that I looked at (covered buttons, etc.).

FutureMrsPaulG · November 2011

If you are expecting your in-laws to foot the bill for the dress, then you should either pick one in their budget or give them a few guidelines and let them pick it out. I saw a dress for my neice (FSIL's toddler daughter) and loved it but I didn't want to ask her to pay for it since it was too much so I baught it as a "gift" for letting me "borrow" her adorable daughter. As she's also a bridesmaid, she was grateful to nnot have to worry about the little one's outfit. Ditto PPsuggestions about Easter dresses. Check some outlet stores too. Nordstrom Rack always has little girl dresses if that's in your budget.

meganiobe · November 2011

If you really want the $150 dress then you can purchase it otherwise you need to see what their budget is. I have a two year old and she was in our wedding along with my 6 year old niece and their dresses combined cost me $15. I had a aunt who is a seamstress make them. If I wouldn't have had this option we would have gotten something along the lines of the "party dresses" at Target or Macy's that are on sale all of the time. $150 for a flower girl dress is outrageous.

Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws

Re: Flower Girl Dress Cost/ Who Pays and Cheap In-laws

Choose Another Board

Search Boards