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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Slightly peeved

We arrived home from our honeymoon  a week ago, and my husband received a message from this guy who he has not seen or spoken to in years asking my husband to call him.  Well apparently, this guy wanted to invite my husband to his bachelor party.  Several of our mutual male friends received the same invitation.  However, my husband and said mutual male friends were not invited to the wedding.  I did some digging, and it's not as though they are having a small, intimate gathering with just family.  He is having a normal sized wedding.  Should my husband call him out on his rudeness?  Or should he just ignore the whole thing?  He isn't sure if he want to go anyhow, but he was curious as to whether or not he should say anything about not being invited to the wedding.  I mean, it is pretty tacky (and RUDE!) to invite someone to your bachelor party, but not to the wedding!  Thoughts?
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Re: Slightly peeved

  • Just have H RSVP no.

    Pointing out when someone is being rude is a rude act in itself, unless you're really close to the person (in which case I would expect my very best friends to set me straight).
  • What this guy is doing is rude, but calling him on it would also be rude.

    If your H wants to go, he should go and enjoy a guys' night out. If he doesn't want to go, he can decline the invitation.
  • I completely think this is a guy v. girl thing.  My Ex-H invited a bunch of people to his bach party that weren't invited to the wedding.  And he and I were invited to a Jack and Jill for a (large) wedding that we weren't invited to.  I, personally, think it's rude.  Especially since the J&J had 'tickets' that you had to buy to get in.  Basically, to me, it amounted to being a 'give me money for my wedding, but you're not cool enough to be invited.' 

    I was also annoyed because this came from a person that came to Ex-H and I's wedding and gave us a 'card' that was a napkin that she had written 'Congrats' on.  WTF?
  • If your H is ok with it, fine. If he's not, he can decline the invite. Don't say anything about the etiquette faux pas.
  • You ladies are correct, calling out on the faux pas would be extremely rude in itself.  I also think several of you are correct in the way women-vs-men see this situation.  My husband didn't even think it was rude until I pointed it out to him!  I will tell him it's his call.  It's also a rather expensive outing at $200/pp, which really irritated me!

    Anniversary Visit The Nest! my read shelf:
    Margot's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • It's rude to point out the rudeness of others.

    That said, I just wouldn't attend the bachelor party.
    my read shelf:
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  • I think if it were a small wedding then it would be understandable, but if it's not...rude.  Don't go.
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