this is the code for the render ad
Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Wedding Invitations & Paper
Wedding Invitations & Paper
New Discussion

The RSVP I've Been Dreading

mdupon70997mdupon70997 member
100 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
in Wedding Invitations & Paper
I've been so excited about getting our RSVP's in the mail lately. I love being able to tally up our guest count each day. And I'm really glad that people are actually returning them and they're not going to waste. We paid for 150 people and that's exactly how many people we invited. No more, no less. But today I got an RSVP that I wasn't too excited about. One of our single guests was invited without a guest, and she returned her RSVP with "2 attending." I don't think it would be that big of a deal if she brought someone, but I come from the school where if you let one person do something, you've gotta let everyone do something. And I've already told several of our single guests that they were invited without a guest. What to do?
Report Reply to Post

Re: The RSVP I've Been Dreading

  • mdupon70997mdupon70997 member
    100 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    I know she's not dating anyone (since I just saw her the other day.)
    Report Reply
  • mlg78mlg78 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    edited March 2013
    Personally, I disagree with contacting her immediately.  I'd wait it out until all of your rsvps come in and see if there's any open spaces with returns declining attending...  I also don't think it's appropriate that it's only if she is newly engaged as mentioned above.  If she does get into a relationship (which doesn't seem to be the case here), their significant other is to be included.
    Report Reply
  • mdupon70997mdupon70997 member
    100 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    Yes. She'll know a lot of people at the wedding. The thing is, we intentionally invited people with a guest only if they're engaged, married, or have been dating for over three months. 
    Report Reply
  • SlothGoalsSlothGoals member
    1000 Comments 250 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_the-rsvp-ive-been-dreading?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:f8cb6ea2-ae01-4b56-a062-df35b036fa0cPost:441a00a6-8640-40f4-b0f4-17bb672daac5">Re: The RSVP I've Been Dreading</a>:
    [QUOTE]Yes. She'll know a lot of people at the wedding. The thing is, we intentionally invited people with a guest <strong>only if they're engaged, married, or have been dating for over three months. </strong>
    Posted by mdupon70997[/QUOTE]

    <div>It's really not your place to judge the seriousness of someone's relationship. All people with significant others should have been invited with their SOs regardless of how long they have been dating.</div>
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Anniversary 
    Report Reply
  • msuprincess04msuprincess04 member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_the-rsvp-ive-been-dreading?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:f8cb6ea2-ae01-4b56-a062-df35b036fa0cPost:d01f3ade-583e-48ba-a7c0-ba27a1c20b35">Re: The RSVP I've Been Dreading</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to The RSVP I've Been Dreading : "Hey Sally! I got your RSVP and we're excited to see you! And I see you are bringing a date ... We're looking forward to meeting your new beau! How did you two meet?" If she says that she's just bringing a friend, say "ah, okay, we actually don't have the budget to accommodate your friend ... We know it would look awkward if we let you bring a friend and all our other friends didn't get to bring one." (I'm assuming she knows other people at the wedding. If she doesn't, I'd let it slide)
    Posted by TXKristan[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Isn't this contradictory? </div><div>We have the space for your new new bf. Oh wait, you don't have a new bf? Then we don't have the space.</div>
    "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"
    Report Reply
  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_the-rsvp-ive-been-dreading?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:f8cb6ea2-ae01-4b56-a062-df35b036fa0cPost:e51e551a-6a64-4165-857d-9bdf1c2ef8c8">Re: The RSVP I've Been Dreading</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: The RSVP I've Been Dreading : Isn't this contradictory?  We have the space for your new new bf. Oh wait, you don't have a new bf? Then we don't have the space.
    Posted by msuprincess04[/QUOTE]

    It is polite to invite everyone with their significant other, no matter if they've been dating 5 days or 5 years.

    The "plus one" doesn't have any etiquette obligation to include whatever friend/relative/bum off the street she'd like to bring along.
    Report Reply
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_the-rsvp-ive-been-dreading?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:f8cb6ea2-ae01-4b56-a062-df35b036fa0cPost:e51e551a-6a64-4165-857d-9bdf1c2ef8c8">Re: The RSVP I've Been Dreading</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: The RSVP I've Been Dreading : Isn't this contradictory?  We have the space for your new new bf. Oh wait, you don't have a new bf? Then we don't have the space.
    Posted by msuprincess04[/QUOTE]

    <div>I totally agree with you on this. </div>
    imageimageimage
    Report Reply
  • mdupon70997mdupon70997 member
    100 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    Maybe I'll wait a little while so I can see how many people will actually be coming to our wedding. And I just got another RSVP today with an additional person attending. UGH!
    Report Reply
  • rsbloomrsbloom member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited April 2013
    I would nip it in the bud. Your friends should have known that they can't bring random people to your wedding if you don't say "and guest."  Call those people individually and say that you don't have room in your budget, even if you do have spaces "open up."

    If you're worried about hurting feelings, you should be consistent. You've already told some of your single friends that they couldn't bring friends, if you let these two do so now, you'll be stepping on more toes.
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards