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Bridal Shower and Out of State Reception Guests

MindyReeceMindyReece
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in Pre-wedding Parties
I have a similar situation to some posts I've read. My fiance and I cannot afford to have all of his extended family from out of state at the wedding, though we are having a second reception in his home state to celebrate with them. Unlike most people, most of his family would travel to be at the wedding, so we can't send invites to them all (though I'd love to)!!  I am being thrown one Bridal Shower where I live and will invite the wedding guests on the wedding list.
My future MIL wants to throw a second Bridal Shower for me where my fiance is from and invite people that aren't invited to the ceremony where we live, but invited to the second reception. I am very flattered that she wants to throw me a party, but am worried about offending guests not invited to the ceremony.
What to do?
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Re: Bridal Shower and Out of State Reception Guests

  • MindyReeceMindyReece
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bridal-shower-and-out-of-state-reception-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:ac4e0e85-1236-402c-806e-ef6f98316e74Post:a498ee26-4531-47f3-9f72-0df3ea0a54eb">Bridal Shower and Out of State Reception Guests</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have a similar situation to some posts I've read. My fiance and I cannot afford to have all of his extended family from out of state at the wedding, though we are having a second reception in his home state to celebrate with them. Unlike most people, most of his family would travel to be at the wedding, so we can't send invites to them all!  I am having one Bridal Shower where I live and will invite the wedding guests on the invite list. My future MIL wants to throw a second Bridal Shower for me where my fiance is from and invite people that aren't invited to the ceremony where we live. Should I tell her that this is inappropriate or just be grateful that she wants to throw me a shower at all??
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  • HilraythebrideHilraythebride member
    500 Comments
    I don't really understand this.  Do you know for certain these people wil not be able to come, have they told you so? Or are you just assuming that they can't because they are out of state?

    If it were me and they told me they couldn't come I would still invite everyone anyway so that you are convered and then if and when they can't come decide to through the other party.  Although this party shouldn't really be like a second reception I don't think you should wear your wedding dress but that may just be me.

    This would cover you for the shower that your FMIL wants to throw you.
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited February 2012
    Hilary, she doesn't want to invite her fi's family to the wedding because they (the bride and groom) can't afford to do it. She's pretty sure they will accept they would travel to her wedding.

    Mindy, only those who are invited to the actual wedding should be invited to a shower. Being invited to  the 2nd reception doesn't count as a wedding invitation. Many people will bring gifts to that, even though it's not required, and whether you expect it or not. To have a shower, in addition to that, would seem very gift grabby, even if it's not your intention.

                       
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