Unity candles/Unity Sand...????

mrswestsoon2be · May 2011

Hello! Thanks for reading my very first post on this site!

All of you have been so much help to my planning! Thank you!

A friend of mine recently asked me if i was doing the unity candle or the sand... I honestly had no idea what either of those were until she asked. My question is.. Do I HAVE to do these? Is it something that shouldn't be left out, llike the cake or something? Or can I get away with not doing it?

HELP!

artbyallie · May 2011

Hi, and welcome! Any kind of unity symbol within the ceremony is completely optional, since the whole wedding is about your unity with your fiancé. We're not doing candles or sand, but we are being presented with a family Bible signed by all four parents.

DramaGeek · May 2011

Ditto artbyallie, it's totally optional.

hellerc1 · May 2011

We are not doing anything other than getting married as a sign of unity. I think it's up to you what you want to have during the ceremony. Good Luck.

flounder511 · May 2011

We are actually doing a mixture of both. We are using candle wax pellets in two different colors and mixing them and then lighting it. Its the best of both worlds

But it is definitely an optional thing and don't worry about it too much

kellya01 · May 2011

We're doing the unity sand, and for us it has significance. If you want to do a unity ceremony in addition to the wedding ceremony, it's optional and I would say that the best unity ceremony would be one that holds meaning for you and your FI.

We're printing Matthew 19:6 in in our ceremony programs, as well as a brief explanation of the significance of the unity sand to us. In our two smaller vases, we will have 1 white sand, 1 green sand. In the big center vase, we'll have a small layer of white and a small layer of green sand on top of each other, then we'll mix the rest of the sand as we pour it. Basically it shows us as 2 individuals coming together as one and can no longer be separated, just like the Bible verse says (So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate, Matthew 19:6).

mandi921vh · May 2011

It is optional and not a requirement.

vwhitney2107 · May 2011

It is completely optional. We are doing the sand unity. Our ceremony is outdoors so candles wouldn't work. But we are having my son take part in the sand ceremony with my FI and I to show that we are uniting as a family.

[Deleted User] · May 2011

Totally opional. Personally I think its silly...

christineann316 · May 2011

We are having an outdoor wedding and don't want to mess with a unity candle. My fiance isn't 100% on board with the sand ceremony. He knows I want to do something and will go with it, but does anyone have different ideas he may like better?

tehlilone · May 2011

Since I was younger, I've only seen unity candles at catholic weddings. But people aren't doing as many strict traditional weddings nowadays so I can see it happening in any type of wedding.

One really cool thing I saw online was, guests were asked to scoop some sand from a bowl into the main vase. During the ceremony, they took that vase with the sand (that guests contributed to) and added the sand from the bride and groom. That way everyone invited was actively part of the ceremony.

dolanr · May 2011

We are doing a "unity button jar"........each guest will be given a fan for our programs with a button attached.......this is the second time around for both of us so we wanted to involve the kids, our pastor is going to say a special prayer and have each guest place the button in their hands and place their special "wish" on it, the kids are going to collect the buttons and place them in a blue mason jar, then the five of us will place our buttons in last..........

kengirl16 · May 2011

Definitely optional! I think it is a lovely symbol. Our mothers will be lighting 2 candles to represent the families, and we will light our unity candle from their flames to symbolizing the two families coming together in our union.

Sand is cute too, and you can have pretty colors! Then you get a special keepsake of your wedding.

HeyBrittany04 · May 2011

We don't like the idea of the sand or candle - just not 'us'.

But we're going to either plant a tree or flowers in a pot so we can plant them at our house after the HM to symbolize new love planting roots and growing.

misslizz · May 2011

Completely optional, but it's a nice keepsake to have.

Unity candles/Unity Sand...????

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