Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony

neen71 · April 2011

Trying to help my daughter come up ideas to incorporate 2 more people into the wedding ceremony--The brides cousin and the grooms sister. Both were asked to be candlelighters...problem is, they just found out that there can be no open flames in the chapel they have chosen, so are now not having candleabras. They already have bridal party participants, singers, scripture readers, guest book attendant, and "greeters" to hand out programs. They'd really like them to be a part of the ceremony...any ideas?

Tanq&Tonic · April 2011

Can they be the witnesses that actually sign the marriage certificate?

trix1223 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_ideas-needed-incorporating-2-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:c0845ea1-70d6-4d69-a38e-9b9523f04865Post:c37726a5-0cc2-4374-8f98-b5c57d66db49">Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony</a>:
[QUOTE]Trying to help my daughter come up ideas to incorporate 2 more people into the wedding ceremony--The brides cousin and the grooms sister. Both were asked to be candlelighters...problem is, they just found out that there can be no open flames in the chapel they have chosen, so are now not having candleabras. They already have bridal party participants, singers, scripture readers,<strong> guest book attendant, and "greeters" to hand out programs. </strong>They'd really like them to be a part of the ceremony...any ideas?
Posted by neen71[/QUOTE]
Well, IMO, the bolded parts are already lame, so I wouldn't add any others. Actually, I'd also cut the guest book attendant and the "greeters", but that's just my preference.

But the other "jobs": cake cutter, personal attendant, etc. are just "pity positions".

In your DD's case, it sounds like she needs suck it up and say to the two people,
"I'm really embarrassed, but I jumped the gun asking you to light candles before clearing that with our ceremony venue. We're not allowed to have candles, so we won't be having candlelighters. But we are so honored that you'll join us as guests at our wedding."

And a big hearty good luck to you all.

DeadUtopia · April 2011

Maybe they could do a sand ceremony instead of a unity candle?? I know it's more of a beachy thing, but it might work out if they REALLY want those 2 people to have something to do.

neen71 · April 2011

Thanks for taking the time to respond...will keep trying of something.

The "greeters" may be lame positions in some opinions, but the 2 young girls that were asked (cousin and close family friend) are so excited to be participating. I do understand the point you are trying to make though about just "making something up" for them to do. All of the ceremony participants are from the brides side (except the groomsman) - so would really like to have his sister do something (she's 17). My daughter is an only child, so my niece is the closest thing to a sister that she has. Even though she's not as close as her 3 BFFs (BMs), she really wanted her included as well.

As for the Sand Cereomony - they chose to do a "Cord of 3 Strands Ceremony" in place of the unity candle, so that's not an option either.

If anyone thinks of anything, please let me know...we don't have a lot of wedding experiance, so at a little biit of a loss.

Thanks all!!

vicki0508 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_ideas-needed-incorporating-2-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:c0845ea1-70d6-4d69-a38e-9b9523f04865Post:bdcec45d-9810-4126-b2c0-b63738121cd9">Re: Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony</a>:
[QUOTE]Maybe they could do a sand ceremony instead of a unity candle?? I know it's more of a beachy thing, but it might work out if they REALLY want those 2 people to have something to do.
Posted by DeadUtopia[/QUOTE]
How would this incorporate a sister and a cousin? Don't unity candles and sand ceremonies usally only involve the bride, groom, and parents?

DeadUtopia · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_ideas-needed-incorporating-2-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:c0845ea1-70d6-4d69-a38e-9b9523f04865Post:20b78d24-4af0-4307-a387-b90fbefd22da">Re: Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony : How would this incorporate a sister and a cousin? Don't unity candles and sand ceremonies usally only involve the bride, groom, and parents?
Posted by vicki0508[/QUOTE]

They were going to use the sister and cousin for the candle thing in the first place. Just a suggestion.

trix1223 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_ideas-needed-incorporating-2-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:c0845ea1-70d6-4d69-a38e-9b9523f04865Post:b342a525-e7a0-471e-8159-91f283e9f283">Re: Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony : They were going to use the sister and cousin for the candle thing in the first place. Just a suggestion.
Posted by DeadUtopia[/QUOTE]

No-read the OP again. The tow displaced relatives were to be candlelighters, lighting candles in a candleabras before the ceremony began. They were not doing any part of the unity ceremony, which would make NO sense at all.

whitelilly1010 · April 2011

What about doing something at the reception? The blessing, a speech, etc.

Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony

Re: Ideas needed - incorporating 2 more into ceremony

Choose Another Board

Search Boards