We're at a standoff with our photographer.
When we signed the contract we were under the impression that we would receive ALL images shot from the day on the high-res DVD, not only her top picks. The contract reads "All unedited high-res files on DVD."
After doing our e-pics she sent us a dvd of 50 from a 4 hour shoot. I requested more, and she sent a second dvd of 50 (all perfectly good images). I asked why they were left out and she said she normally only delivers her top picks. After a long phone conversation it became clear that this was going to be the case for the wedding as well. She agreed to do a larger edit, but will not release all the images to us (not even as proofs). I requested the b&w images to be deliverd color and this a problem with her as well.
She said flatly that if we are looking for a photographer to deliver all the images from the day she will refund our deposit and we can find someone else.
FI wants to find a new photographer- I'm ready to have a breakdown at the thought of meeting with more photographers 4 months out. We're happy with the work of our current photographer, but the thought of not getting all the images is very upsetting.
As a side note, my degree is in photography and I work in print production and she's well aware of this and it seems like she's a bit threatened? I don't know.
Thoughts? Ideas? I'm at a loss.

Re: Photography meltdown (long)
I don't view this as an issue as long as you get a complete set of pictures that covers all the important events. It is typically for a photographer to take 2-3 pictures of the same thing in case someone blinks or the camera misfocuses. As long as you get a picture of that particular thing, I don't think it's an issue for them to weed out the bad versions. For a full day including prep it should be AT least 400-500 pictures minimum. Ask her how many pictures she thinks you will get? If she says something like 200, then something fishy is going on.
The B+W issue shouldn't be a problem, all pictures are photographed in color and converted later. If you read my other post you will see why some photographers change certain pictures to black and white hehe.
View our FOR SALE items
http://tinyurl.com/3jjv7vy
Look at the file numbers and you can get a feel for how many pics she skipped out on showing you. Maybe she had difficulty with the lighting in a certain scene and is anal about what she presents to clients.
I would still ask about how many pics to expect from the wedding. Also ask her if her top pics doesn't include any from the parents dances or cake cutting, does that mean she won't get any pics of those events? The answer may help you decide if it's time to move on.
View our FOR SALE items
http://tinyurl.com/3jjv7vy
Our photographer said we'd get X amount of edited, high-res files on one CD. And we'd get an external hard drive with every single photo taken on our wedding day, albeit non-edited. We wound up getting around 700 edited photos on the CD, and MH said there were a couple thousand on the hard drive. We also have the right to print them wherever we want and to do what we want with them.
As far as B&W vs. color, nearly everything was in color. A few were in B&W (like, under 10), but the color shot was also included.
What does your contract specifically say?
If you really feel that your missing "something" from your pictures, then I think you should go with someone else. I dont care if the contract can be interpreted 85 ways. You are paying and you have to be happy. These pictures will be around forever. If she is offering you your deposit back so you can pick someone else what I would do is start looking and interviewing now. Hopefully you will find someone who you want.
Danes- I think you're approach is how we're going to go. I've already contacted a few photographers that I found on WPJA.com that are available, so we may interview those and take it from there. If we don't find anyone that we're comfortable with that can deliver what we're looking for, we'll stay with her. But if we do, we may just go ahead and get our deposit back.
RIP Little Man October 15, 1995 - June 1, 2010