Shower Gift Giving Etiquette Question (invited to multiple showers)

Re: Shower Gift Giving Etiquette Question (invited to multiple showers)

• ootmother2 member

  

  April 2011 edited April 2011

  The Bridal party and both the moms are invited to all showers as a courtesy.  They may attend all or none but only one shower gift is expected.
  
  so, you're fine with one gift for all showers.
  
  If you feel uncomfortable showing up empty handed at the other showers, pick up a couple of litle kitchen gadgets for fun gifts.

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• ootmother2 member

  

  April 2011

  I don't like this idea as much but you could buy something that has a lot of pieces.  Salad set, as an example, and give part each shower.
  
  Inexpensive bottles of wine would be fine or a small plant.

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• SirJuliusVonHaast

  

  April 2011

  It's not required, but personally I would just get something small because I feel uncomfortable showing up to a shower empty handed. 

  
  

  I would get some spatulas or a whisk, or a can opener (whatever's on the registry) for the shower, and something like a cheap bottle of wine or some lotion for the 'pamper the bride' thing. 

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• hlq2011

  

  April 2011

  My bridesmaid (who lives in Connecticut, while I'm in Maryland) was invited to both my showers in Massachusetts, where I'm from.  She didn't bring a gift to the first shower, and won't to the second if she comes, but she did order a gift shipped online, to my FILs in Maryland.
  
  If anyone noticed she hadn't brought a gift to the shower (other than me, but I knew she was shipping something), I didn't hear about it.
  
  If you don't want to show up empty-handed, I'm sure something small is fine.  But it's not required.
  

  

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• karmellah

  

  April 2011

  i always give a gift to every shower i go to. might be 2 smaller things but hey

  

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• jerseydevil member

  

  April 2011

  Agree with PPs. I would feel weird showing up empty-handed as well, so I'd bring small items. The pamper the bride shower I would probably bring a bottle of wine.

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• jaytee16

  

  April 2011

  I agree for the most part.  I was a BM in January and the bride had 3 showers.  Even though all the BMs pitched in for the showers (at least 2) - decorations, prizes for the games, etc. I think many of us felt there was an expectation to bring a gift to each one (which is a contributing factor as to why I did not attend 1 of the 3).  

  
  

  I was upfront (after this experience) with all my BMs and said if they can/want to attend any/all showers, feel free but please do not feel obligated to bring something!  I didn't want anyone feeling that kind of pressure, I know I sure did!

  
  My Ovulation Chart
  

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• kitkat610 member

  

  April 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_shower-gift-giving-etiquette-question-invited-multiple-showers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:663ecc63-dfb2-4e77-8c26-b9d336fa3b9dPost:57b6e05b-d409-4bfb-9fc6-17955720ee4b">Re: Shower Gift Giving Etiquette Question (invited to multiple showers)</a>:
  [QUOTE]  I was upfront (after this experience) with all my BMs and said if they can/want to attend any/all showers, feel free but please do not feel obligated to bring something!  I didn't want anyone feeling that kind of pressure, I know I sure did!
  Posted by jaytee16[/QUOTE]
  
  I so appreciated this because my friend did the same for her wedding this summer. I think all together there are 5 shower type events.
  
  As for not brining gifts, I did that to a couple of showers last year where there were multiple events and noticed (probably bc I was looking) that some others did the same. I wouldn't feel bad about it especially since you are in the wedding party. Like PP said, you can do something small, but don't feel obligated. I am sure the most important thing for the bride is that you are there to share in the experience.

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• LoloKU8182 member

  

  April 2011

  Thanks so much for all of the ideas and advice!!! I am planning to bake cookies and brownies for the Pamper the Bride Shower (which is right before the Bachelorette Party) and that is probably going to be my gift for that one... and either just show up or bring a small gift to the other one.

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