Just Engaged!!!

kmd0501 · December 2010

So I'm new to TK and figured I would introduce myself to the local board! I'm 23 and live in North Wilmington but grew up in PA. Most of my family is from DE so I know the area well. I got engaged 12/4/10 to my fabulous boyfriend of 2 years. We've lived together for almost a year and he has the most wonderful 4 year old son in the world! We are planning a March 2013 wedding, as I am looking to go back to school and he just finished so saving money is really the reason for the delay. I work as an EMT currently, am a 2009 graduate of West Chester University and am looking to go back for my bachelors in nursing. FI just finished paramedic school and is working on passing his boards! I am so excited to start planning my wedding and as tempting as it is, I've been doing pretty good with not getting to far ahead of myself. The holidays have been a good buffer so far. We have however started discussing a venue we'd like to have our ceremony/reception and we've chose 3 place: Concordville Inn in PA, The Deerfield Country Club and Mendenhall Inn also in PA. Any feedback on any of these venues would be so greatly appreciated and any other suggestions as well. I am looking forward to getting to know everyone else on the board and cant wait to start planning!

paprika28 · December 2010

Welcome, and congrats! You'll find the girls on this board are so helpful:)

Ms.BriarRose · December 2010

CONGRATS! And Welcome! It's great to see you here

I know a ton of people who have gotten married at Mendenhall and have loved it. You get a ton of bang for your buck there. I haven't attended a wedding there, but I hear the grand ballroom is really beautiful.

I haven't heard much on Concordville, though it is owned by the same people as Mendenhall.

Deerfield is okay, IMO. We went to a wedding there a week after ours. The space layout is well, different- I just wasn't a fan of it. We were in the atrium, I guess, for the ceremony, this other space for cocktail, and then the ballroom. The ballroom was pretty, but I wasn't a fan of the other spaces. My biggest complaint was the food. While it was good, after we ate our salads, we waited an HOUR for our main course- and since the dance floor wasn't open, and neither was the bar (it was closed during dinner), we had nothing to do but sit and twiddle our thumbs. It was enough of a turnoff that I wouldn't recommend it to someone else.

A couple of thoughts for you: Have you thought about looking elsewhere in DE? The girls on here may be able to offer you a couple of other options that you hadn't thought of. The reason I say that is you are going to pay 6% sales tax in PA, and that is on top of the 18-20% gratuity. I have talked to many brides who have either done thier wedding in DE for that reason, or have wished they had done it here. Do a post with your budget and what you are looking for, and the girls will come back with some fabulous answers.

Second, remember that if you get married in PA, you have to get a PA marriage license, and from what I have heard about getting one from the girls on the Philly board, it's not as easy as getting one in DE. Just a thought to remember (most people don't realize you get a license where you are getting married, not where you are from).

Hope that helps a little bit! Can't wait to see you on the boards a bunch more!!

RecoveringActor · December 2010

CONGRATS!!!!

And ditto everything MBR said. I'm from PA... and I've lived in DE for the past 5 years, and we're getting married in DE for that exact reason. For me it meant that I could invite more people. There are a lot of great venues in Wilmington that have good packages and really take care of you.

Mattsbride10 · December 2010

congrats and welcome to the board.

lesliejenna · December 2010

Congrats and welcome! It's never to early to join TK and get inspired, IMO.

Re: Venues:
*Never been to Concordville Inn, but looks lovely on the web site!
*Deerfield is nice, but I agree with Mrs. BR - The service at the wedding I attended was painfully slow. Thank goodness the band was always playing and drinks were aplenty... I can't imagine how awkward it would have been without either!
*Mendenhall is fabulous! My FSIL got married there 3 years ago. I'm totally jealous, would have loved to have our wedding there, but I didn't want to do the same place.

It has a hotel attached for people to stay in, and the food is to die for. The ballroom is amazing and the attached area for a cocktail hour is just as nice.

We chose The Hartefeld in Avondale, PA for our wedding in Oct 2011. Given that they are so close to DE, and I'm sure have heard the sales tax concerns from several couples, they're super negotiable and actually offered us amazing pricing for all that we're getting! I'd highly recommend calling Kelly West for more info.

Good luck with planning! and congrats again!

soontobeschooley · December 2010

Congratulations and Welcome to the board!!

EiDuffy · December 2010

Congrats and Welcome!!

kmd0501 · December 2010

Thanks everyone...i am so sad to ehar how wonderful the Mendenhall is (i know weird lol). I am really considering it but my parents just got divorced and I dont speak to my mother anymore and that is where my parents went every year for their anniversary (for over 25 years) and i think it would be very uncomfortable for my dad. But we havent even talked about that yet and im not even approaching ANY wedding conversations until after christmas so I'll see how he feels about it. Since he has offered to pay for most of it, I feel like its so important that hes comfortable and no old feelings are brought back up (the divorce is very very recent). But i will look around more in DE. I am always so conscious of the sales tax but didnt even think of it when it comes to this! My FI wants a place with rooms available at the venue so we can continue with an after party and i have alot of family from Southern DE/MD/VA that would want to spend the night. Any suggestions on good hotels that could provide our ceremony and reception? There are soo many idk where to start

wicked+faery · December 2010

congrats! at this stage, u can take ur time, but around the 1 year mark is when u're really gonna want to start getting things booked. happy planning ^_^

RecoveringActor · December 2010

kmd--I'm having my wedding at a hotel. It's the Clarion Belle out in New Castle. Their website is http://www.clarionbelle.com and they're WONDERFUL. I also looked at the Doubletree, but it was a bit out of my price range. We have a lot of out of town guests, too, so having the reception at a hotel was really nice. The woman at the Clarion that I've been speaking to is Ginny, and she's a total sweetheart.

They actually just renovated the entire property. It used to be a Ramada in YEARS ago, and then it was nothing for 5 or 6 years. Clarion bought it and it looks beautiful. They do include a 21% gratuity, so be aware of that when you're looking at packages, and that's pretty standard for a lot of places. If you have any other questions about it, PM me.

Ms.BriarRose · December 2010

So i had typed this thing, and then my computer shut down for updates on me. Ugh. It's long, and I apologize, but it has a ton of venue options and info that is going to help you.

First off, I agree with Wicked. Aside from your venue (which you want to book as soon as possible to get the best rates), you have time.

Second, the two most important things to set first are your budget (VERY important!) and your guest list. Your budget determines what kind of venue you have, so even a ballpark number will help ($50 per guest, $100 per guest, unlimited per guest?). Your venue will take up approximately 50% of your total budget, so be prepared to double whatever the venue costs (you can make it less by penny pinching, but this is just approximate). Your guest list also decides some venues, as there are some that have strict limits. Others are large enough to accomodate overflow on the guest list.

Be advised that many of the "higher end" locations, including Deerfield, Hartfeld, Dupont Country Club, Hotel DuPont, and many of the other country clubs, as well as Mendenhall Inn (I think, I can't remember from my search) have minimum amounts. That means that you MUST pay them at least that amount (often around $20,000), even if your guest list doesn't meet that. So while you may calculate out that it works with the Price Per Person, if they have a minimum, it won't matter.

I suggest looking at All Inclusive venues- you are going to get the most bang for your buck here. Often things like floral centerpieces, the cake, linens (white, ivory, and sometimes colored), open bar, and other things are included in the price per person. Doing a place where you have to bring in a caterer, plus all the tables, chairs, china, flatware, etc etc, plus you don't get any additions like with All Inclusives, can add up and quickly. You can do it on a budget, but it's hard.

Finally, don't rule out non-hotel venues yet. You may be able to negotiate a shuttle with the hotel that you book a block at for your guests. Adding a shuttle, if needed, can be minimal cost and lets your guests arrive safely at both venue and hotel (A school bus is a popular shuttle choice, and trust me, your guests won't notice!).

With any of the following, some have space for a ceremony and some don't. Don't worry, though- there are spaces around here that do just ceremonies, like Gibraltar Gardens, Mount Pleasant Meeting House and Parsonage (DE State Parks), and several others.

That being said, here are some options of HOTEL venues:

The Clarion Hotel, like RA said. From what I hear it has a very southern feel, so that might be nice for your guests.

Clayton Hall at UD. They aren't attached to a hotel, but they are right next door to the Courtyard Marriott at UD, where you can book a block of rooms for your guest. I have been to a wedding here, and you get a very "Country Club" feel from the space. The people are really nice to work with, very accomodating. I know you get your wedding night hotel room for free, and I believe you get a discount on the after wedding breakfast brunch. Mrs.Jax09, an older knottie, got married here.

Embassy Suites in Newark. I have been to an event here, and it's nice. It does have a guest limit, don't know what, so be prepared to discuss that. Sparrow, a newly married knottie, got married here.

The DoubleTree on 202 in North Wilmington is very nice (I attended a luncheon there). I have not been in the guest rooms, nor worked with them, but i have heard from non-knottie brides they are easy to work with. I would suggest looking at this DoubleTree versus the one in the city, as that one is not in the best location safety wise.

the Hilton Christiana is really, really pretty. They have a seperate outside courtyard space that is really nice, and then the ballroom inside. It's really pretty, and I have heard they are decent to work with. They do have a guest limit- somewhere around 120 guests- so be prepared for that. Donnalynn, an older Knottie, got married here, and her pictures were really pretty.

The Hotel DuPont is the Creme de la Creme of Hotel weddings. It's opulence abounding. It's also VERY expensive. I beleive they have a $20-25,000 minimum, and that's not the bottom line of what you will spend. I have heard from brides that they are easy to work with, I have heard from brides that they are horrible to work with, so it depends on your situation. I would advise that unless you have unlimited funds, you not look here, because then nothing would compare (trust me!).

Here is suggestions for NON-HOTEL VENUES:

The Delaware Natural History Museum, and the Delaware Art Museum both do receptions. I don't know much about them at all, just that they do them, and that they book really far out because it's a popular space.

The Delaware Horticultural Society in Wilmington does receptions, and I have heard it's a gorgeous space. That's all I know, though.

I have heard through the grapevine that The Delaware Children's Museum does weddings, so you may want to look into that- OMG, I would have loved to have it there!

DuPont Country Club is really pretty, with 3 different choices of venue spaces on the property. I do believe they also have a minimum amount, so be careful about that.

Winterthur Museum and Gardens is a GORGEOUS property. They have a seperate ceremony space, in the gardens, which is absolutely breathtaking. Then the reception would be indoors. Former older Knottie Tiki got married here, and her pictures were gorgeous. Be prepared for a minimum amount, though I am not sure if they do it or not.

Greenville Country Club is really pretty; my cousin almost got married here. I am not sure what their specs are, and if you have to have a member sponsor you or not. If you are interested, I would give them a call anyway.

Brandywine Country Club, from what I have heard, is decent bang for your buck. Former knottie BubblyBlondy got married there.

The Farmhouse is one I would HIGHLY encourage you to look into. It is GORGEOUS. It's an old converted farmhouse, with wood floors, tons of streaming light, a seperate "library" where guests can sit and talk, and no decorations are needed at this place- it has charm all it's own. They have a seperate ceremony space surrounded by tall evergreens (which block sight and sound from the road). The ceremony site is pretty- yes, pretty. The bride and groom can stand in the gazebo, or stand in front of it- either way, it's a gorgeous backdrop. The bride walks up this stone path. There is a huge weeping willow tree that overshadows the entire guest area- it's almost magical. and THE FOOD IS FAB!!! Oh, so good. Former knottie Mrs.LuraT got married there, and we attended. Honestly, if I had known how nice this place was, I would have wanted my reception there. They do have a guest max- I believe somewhere in the 120 range.

Hartefeld Country Club= I attended a wedding there, and it was okay. The ceremony was outside, and the view was nice- but you had club members sitting on the patio watching the whole thing, which weirded me out. The cocktail hour was outside under the tent, and the bar is outside also. The wait staff was not impressive- they only stood in one place and you had to pretty much go to them, which for someone who is disabled like me is not cool at all. We went inside for the reception, which was nice, but smaller- I believe they have a guest limit as well. The food was GREAT. That I can say no problem. The biggest problem we had was with the bar being outside, everyone congregated around that, instead of on the dance floor- and the dance floor was pretty much bare the entire time. Just some thoughts from the wedding I attended.

Executive Banquet and Conference Center is where I had my reception, and it was really nice. It does sit at the front corner of an industrial park, but if you can look past that and realize that you are inside the whole time, it didn't really matter to me. We went with them because we got the most bang for our buck. Gratuity is included in the pricing, and if you go with a Friday night or Sunday wedding, you get 10% off. You also get the cake, floral centerpieces, colored linens (the only place I saw that did color linens at no charge), a 5 hour reception instead of a 4 hour reception. The bar was well stocked (8 beers, and good ones, on tap). The food was good; not the greatest, but not the worst I have had either. From what I heard from guests, they all really enjoyed it. The cocktail hour is held out in this large lobby, and then the reception is in the ballroom. Both are really pretty- very much my style, not opulent or gaudy, but minimalistic, clean lines, simple decorations, that kind of thing. They have a screen which we did a slideshow preview of some of our wedding photos (our photog was awesome and did it for us at no charge). They have a separate bridal suite with a very large bathroom (a must, let me tell ya). I would suggest checking it out, especially with the great pricing they have.

There are two that I am going to recommend that don't fit into either of these categories.

The first is in PA. The Stone Barn in Kennett is an awesome venue. It's this converted barn, with a huge fireplace, a hay loft, and just amazing charm. They have two halls; the big one has windows galore, and holds a good number of people. The smaller one has three separate rooms, and is much more intimate. They have two (I think) ceremony spaces in their gardens, and it's enchanting- you think immediately of The Secret Garden. If it rains, you have it in front of the huge stone fireplace, and it's breathtaking. And the food. The food was the best we have ever had at a wedding, hands down- it's the only time we have gone up for seconds (the Farmhouse was a close second). They hold Sunday Brunches open to the public and I highly encourage you to attend- it's a wonderful venue. If we had not gone with ours, it would have been between this place and the farmhouse- and this place probably would have won, just because of its uniqueness; it's the only place my husband has ever spoken up about really liking.

The other places I am going to recommend, two of them, are bring your own places. I am not fond of bring your own places, where you get just the hall and nothing else, but these two are amazing.

The first is Delaware Center for Contemporary Arts, in the city of Wilmington. It's a really unique space, very edgy, and I think it's got a great thing going.

The other is Blue Ball Barn, owned by the DE State Parks. It's an old converted barn, and is really awesome. It's a certified Green space venue, which is really neat.

Okay, so now that this is extremely long, I encourage you to visit each website and go from there. Then ask us questions on here. We will help as best we can!

cfblechman · December 2010

Congrads! Finally someone with a longer engagement then me

hehe. Agreed though decide on the budget and then the venue. We didnt originally plan for a super long engagement but the place we wanted was booked and was booking up fast for 2012! This was in July 2010! so thats important.

Ill add one more to the Brantwyn which is a Dupont Country club property I think. But FIs sister just got married there this may. It was so pretty and gorgeous grounds

Just Engaged!!!

Re: Just Engaged!!!

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