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CherryHelp · August 2012

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Gabrielle76 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_cocktail-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:572fa126-70c3-4f04-844f-c82fd6911c41Post:510ffbb6-68c9-418a-8971-c14047ee8979">Cocktail Reception</a>:
[QUOTE]Backstory: I am the BM and have been planning the wedding. We found her venue for the reception, and very close to booking the ceremony site. Bride has also decided it will be a cocktail reception. As in no plated dinner more of a very heavy appatizer, buffet and hand passed with a wine and beer bar. I think this is just fine as the guest list is about 60. Reception is starting at 7 sharp and recep site will not let guest in before then (understandably). The dilema: The ceremony site Bride fell in love with is about 1 mile away from the recep site perfect right...until i factor in down time for guests. ceremony site is a nice historical bldg in a park and pictures will be in a park. Bride thought if there is a 30 min or so lag after the ceremony, guests can mingle on the ceremony site as a cocktail hour before heading off to the recep site while the pictures are being taken. I'm thiniking is it even appropriate to have a cocktail hour if the reception is cocktail food already? Especially since the ceremony would start at least at 6pm. I mean to me, thinking as a guest, this is redundant and quite stupid. As a guest I would rather just go straight from ceremony to reception especially if there is no plated dinner. The bride is saying oh just punch and chesse and crackers at the ceremony site and the heavy apps at the recep. I dont want be overbearing with my little bride and have not said anything at all. I honestly think the pics should be done before the ceremony and just keep the train rolling. what do you guys think? Is cocktail hour preceeding cocktail reception the way to go?
Posted by CherryHelp[/QUOTE]

6PM is too early for the ceremony if no dinner is being served, unless the appetizers are enough to equal a full meal. As a guest I would rather go straight over the the reception, personally, so I'm with you.

But most importantly, stop worrying about it. As a BM your only 'job' is to show up in the right outfit on the wedding day, the bride and groom should be the ones in charge of all the planning, it shouldn't be something you should worry about.

Avion22 · August 2012

Why not have the ceremony start later --say, 8pm. As soon as the ceremony is over, guests can proceed to the reception site for cocktail and apps. I agree that 6pm is way too early to start a reception that doesn't have enought food to be a full meal (and base don your description, it doesn't sound that she will have enough food for a full meal). If there's not enough food, and people haven't eaten ahead of time (which they probably wouldn't for a 6pm ceremony), then they will leave the reception early in search of food.

QueerFemme · August 2012

Unless the appetizers are going to make a full meal, she needs to start her wedding later. For a 6pm ceremony, people will have to likely leave their houses between 4:30-5:15ish, depending on location and traffic and to get there early. She needs to either serve a full meal or push her ceremony start time to about 7:30 or later.

CherryHelp · August 2012

I am working the enitre shindig. My friend is injured and has no one to help her. The apps are big enogh to suffice a meal that she made sure of. The time issue is one of those things that she dug her heels into. and again the amount of food is not the issue there is enough apps for guest to be satisfied (the venue and I are making sure of that). My question is cocktail hour preceeding cocktail reception the way to go?

RebeccaB88 · August 2012

It's not your job to worry about this. It's her wedding, so she (and her FI) need to figure this out. You can make suggestions based on the good advice PPs have given, but other than that, back off and let them handle it. It's not your wedding, so it's not your responsibility.

ETA: just saw you were working this? I guess she's paying you to be her wedding planner/coordinator? (I hope you aren't doing all this for free, injury or no.) If so, tell her what PPs said about the timing. I would not have a pre-cocktail reception cocktail hour. Just adjust the ceremony time to let guests go straight from the ceremony to the reception.

balletdawn · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_cocktail-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:572fa126-70c3-4f04-844f-c82fd6911c41Post:f2ff2bb6-57fc-4857-bd15-55bec08fea60">Re: Cocktail Reception</a>:
[QUOTE]It's not your job to worry about this. It's her wedding, so she (and her FI) need to figure this out. You can make suggestions based on the good advice PPs have given, but other than that, back off and let them handle it. It's not your wedding, so it's not your responsibility. ETA: just saw you were working this? I guess she's paying you to be her wedding planner/coordinator? (I hope you aren't doing all this for free, injury or no.) If so, tell her what PPs said about the timing. <strong> I would not have a pre-cocktail reception cocktail hour. Just adjust the ceremony time to let guests go straight from the ceremony to the reception.</strong>
Posted by RebeccaB88[/QUOTE]
this seems like a logical solution. However, if she has thought about this idea already and rejected it, then let it be. Yes, you are helping her, but she and her FI should be making the big decisions.

Also, I don't understand the DD. You were quoted-can't make it go away.

CherryHelp · August 2012

Sorry...I got found out at work and this was the result. Didn't mean to seem rude with the deleting. Her FI is not in the country, she is injured, and has no family. Except for me as she puts it. I got a lot of thinking to do. Thank you all for your input...no more Knotting at work lol.

NcsuPsych · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_cocktail-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:572fa126-70c3-4f04-844f-c82fd6911c41Post:ef6d599a-8364-47f8-920e-f2e62b4c605b">Re: delete</a>:
[QUOTE]Sorry...I got found out at work and this was the result. Didn't mean to seem rude with the deleting. Her FI is not in the country, she is injured, and has no family. Except for me as she puts it. I got a lot of thinking to do. Thank you all for your input...no more Knotting at work lol.
Posted by CherryHelp[/QUOTE]

Your work made you delete the original post? That doesn't make much sense to me.
Good luck with the planning.

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