Moving

Re: Moving

• theluckiest555

  

  April 2011

  That is sweet of your FI. He is excited to marry you! But I'd also be concerned about him leaving everything to be with me. There are alot of questions that would weigh in on his decision. What does he do/ is he done with school? Does he have family there? If he works/goes to school where he lives, will he be able to find another job/school where you are? What are you planning on doing after you graduate? But the big question is, what do YOU think. Only you two can make this decision, and it is a big one. I could not do a long distance relationship because I get very lonely haha. When I first started dating my FI, he lived about 45 minutes away from me, and even that was hard, mostly because he didn't have a car at the time, and I would have to do all the driving and with work and school my time with him was precious. So I understand your FI wanting to be closer to you, you just gotta weigh the risks and benefits. Obviously, the biggest benefit would be him being closer to YOU, but you also gotta think about what he would be leaving befind... like is he tied down to where is he now? (as in career wise, family, etc.) Best wishes honey and congrats!!

  

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• kmaggio730

  

  April 2011

  My FI and I moved right after we got engaged.  Fair warning it is not easy.  He is working so hard to help to support us considering i am in school and cant work.  He also feels that he has no life because he left all his friends and family.  There have been many issues, although i cant imagine still being away from him.  Its a lot of hard work, but with open communication it can be done.  This has only been a few months that we moved to my home town and i am scared to he will resent me in the future.  To this point it is working, and i am hoping he will start to make friends soon so he can feel like he has something other then me.  i didnt want him to uproot himself originally, but we decieded together that nothing would be harder then being apart.  I hope this helps

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• untherapy

  

  April 2011

  I'm finishing my classes this spring and will move this May to start my research. FI is moving too. We were apart last summer while I was working there and we hated it. He basically decided he was ready for a new job and a new city, and that he wanted us to stay together, so he's coming. He hasn't found a job up there yet, and we'll both be started fresh on things like friends and community, but we're going to make it work.
  
  So I'd just ask your FI to think through those questions. If being with you is important enough to deal with getting a new job and new home then I'd say seriously consider the moving thing. A year and a half is a good chuck of time. Then as a couple you can decide where you're going next.
  

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• S0095042 member

  

  April 2011

  sweet gesture, but he can wait. You're almost done

  

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