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Guests + 1

prettymami2prettymami2
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in African American Weddings
A friend of mine made a comment to me that whenever you invite someone to a wedding it's supposed to be Guest +1. Is that the standard practice in real life because if I allowed every single one of my guests to have a +1 then I would be way over packing the room.

I just though that was really random. I dont' know I may be off base but is that standard?
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Re: Guests + 1

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    summerbride11summerbride11
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    edited December 2011

    Someone commented the same thing to me and I responded that "...we did not make accomodations for every guest plus 1....we invited guests that were married or in commited relationships with thier S/O. This person was dating my DH's friend for a long time and they broke up before the wedding and she wanted to bring another date. We told her that if they (her and DH's friend) chose not to come together, they could both attend as singles.  Honestly, if she wasn't DH's girlfriend (at the time the invites went out), she wouldn't have even made the list ....so there was no way she was going to bring another guest and cause drama.

    Oh...I got caught up.....I believe it used to be the "Standard" to invite everyone one with a guest but not anymore.  The prices of weddings have gone up so much, I don't know anyone who invited every single guest with a plus one.  That's where you get those extra seats at your reception, because people tell you they are bringing a date and they don't..smh.

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    sweets18sweets18
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    edited December 2011
    I have heard that too... but I don't think I really care...lol. For my out of town guest they will get a plus one, whether they are single or not just because I know most won't travel alone. As for the others, if you aren't in a committed relationship that I know about and approve of (jk) you can come solo.


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    ChanelShadesChanelShades
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    edited December 2011
    Yes, that is standard. You are supposed to let them bring a guest. However, many people do what they want because they are paying LOL. 
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    kenyasobeautifulkenyasobeautiful member
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    edited December 2011
    I agree with the others. It is standard.

    My wedding however; will not be standard. These plain Jane etiquette rules just are not practical in 20.10 and beyond.

    I agree with out of town guest, I definatly will accomidate them with a +1.

    Local guest will be based on me and FI discretion only.
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    lovelyaka08lovelyaka08
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    edited December 2011

    My FI and I talked about this last night. We are only giving OOT guests and those that are either married or in committed relationships a +1.

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    M1ssJM1ssJ member
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    edited December 2011
    Im with you ladies one of my "aunties" told me that and I also let them know it's standard for the parents of the bride to pay for everything  and since they cannot do so we will throw all standard out of the wedding, lol

    I'm extending no plus ones unless we are friends with their "boo" too or they are engaged or married. As I told our frat brothers , I am not paying for your chick of the week to eat my pancakes, since my frat brothers live in the same region they will travel together and make a boy's weekend out of it.
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    sweets18sweets18
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_guests-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:8a95cc08-681f-4b35-a5d3-d73950785cd4Post:ce03481e-35d4-4ab1-983e-2ab368d32227">Re: Guests + 1</a>:
    [QUOTE]Im with you ladies one of my "aunties" told me that and I also let them know <strong>it's standard for the parents of the bride to pay for everything  and since they cannot do so we will throw all standard out of the wedding</strong>, lol I'm extending no plus ones unless we are friends with their "boo" too or they are engaged or married. As I told our frat brothers ,<strong> I am not paying for your chick of the week to eat my pancakes</strong>, since my frat brothers live in the same region they will travel together and make a boy's weekend out of it.
    Posted by M1ssJ[/QUOTE]

    I agree with this 100%!!!!


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    prettymami2prettymami2
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    edited December 2011
    Okay so the ladies have spoken it's a standard practice but based on it being a recession out this piece this is not traditional. I could only think that I would have close to 400 guests.

    Anyway yeah I was carrying as such meaning married or serious relationships that I am familiar with only. As my cousin says, " i can't hav every raggedy anne and andy drinking up my open bar lol.
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    arcany123arcany123
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    edited December 2011
    whoever told you that has clearly never had to pay for a wedding. i have a rule at the wedding, no introductions.  if i havent met you, you are not invited.  and even then, plus one invitations will be given to select few (bridesmaids). 
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    7venAfricano7venAfricano member
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    edited December 2011

    It's standard but it just isn't logical, practical, rational, etc, etc (you get the point). I'm only doing plus ones for people who are married, in committed relationships, or those who will not know anyone at the exception of me and maybe two other people there. Aside from that, if you change partners the same as a prostitute turning out johns (or janes) then I'm sorry but you either have to come solo or stay at home and if they still don't like it they are more than welcome to hand me the cash in order to make their +1 happen- I'm just sayin. We can do it like the club and charge 15 dollars per (extra) head at the doorMoney mouth

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    aprilmelissa1979aprilmelissa1979
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    edited December 2011
    I know that this is standard.  I agree with PP. I am only inviting the guest and their spouse.  I have been invited to many weddings as a single person with no plus one and was not offended.  I understood that weddings are expensive.


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    prettymami2prettymami2
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    edited December 2011
    LMAO @ SEVENAFRICA.
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    banks69banks69
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_guests-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:8a95cc08-681f-4b35-a5d3-d73950785cd4Post:9c4c65f6-9a06-4067-9203-c4dc3e152c0c">Re: Guests + 1</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's standard but it just isn't logical, practical, rational, etc, etc (you get the point). I'm only doing plus ones for people who are married, in committed relationships, or those who will not know anyone at the exception of me and maybe two other people there. Aside from that, if you change partners the same as a prostitute turning out johns (or janes) then I'm sorry but you either have to come solo or stay at home and if they still don't like it they are more than welcome to hand me the cash in order to make their +1 happen- I'm just sayin. <strong>We can do it like the club and charge 15 dollars per (extra) head at the door
    </strong>Posted by 7venAfricano[/QUOTE]

    ***holding in my loud laughter in this office right about now!***

    I need to tell this to FI who have family members trying to bring their mama, sister, and all dem!
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