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Decisions... :/ (Super long.)

I copy and pasted this from NEY because I know that a bunch of y'all are psych students and wanted some more opinions.

I'm getting closer to finally graduating, so I'm trying to get a plan together. I know that plans change based on various cofactors, but I'll reassess the situation if that occurs.

I'm going to have my BS of Psych.  BF and I are planning on getting married after I graduate.  He will already be out for about 2 years.

Our main public university has a distance learning school up here in the upstate.  The actual university is about two hours or so south from where I live, so I would have to move down there.

I'm thinking about a Masters of Social Work.  That's a year and a half worth of classes, if I don't do any during the summer. 

They also offer a Certificate of Graduate Study in Drug and Substance Abuse, which I find very interesting.

Option A:
Get married before I go to grad school, then move down to Columbia together for the two years I need for full time study.  The problem is, he'll probably be established in his career and will be difficult for him to move.

Option B:
Straight into my masters, get married afterwards... but that would mean 4 years from now, which I am not a fan of.  Maybe get the certificate afterwards.

Option C:
Take advantage of the distance learning center (it is only offered part time so I will be able to contribute more financially) for two years and be able to live up here.  I'll still have to move down for the last year of advanced study. Still, maybe get the certificate afterwards.

Option D: Move down by myself and spend a semester getting the certificate and get married afterwards, and then work on my masters later if I still feel a need for it.


I think I covered everything.  I just need outside opinions.  BF said he will go for whatever I want to do, but really doesn't want to wait 4 years to get married.


ETA:  More options that aren't as big of options to me right now. :(

Option E:
Go to med school.  I've been considering this less and less lately.  I would love to actually be a doctor, but I really don't know if I'm willing to put in 9 years of school for it (Psychiatry/Neurology program has an extra year of residency) and put my life on hold.  And with that much of an advanced degree, I don't know if I would want to stay home with kids, which is very important to me.

Option F:
Get my PhD in Counseling.  But I would have to move states also.  And I would try to get residency, so we would have to live over the border for a year before I could start.
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Re: Decisions... :/ (Super long.)

  • I can't really offer advice on what to do, since its a very personal decision, but I will tell you what I am doing.

    I am in school getting my PhD in chemistry- I graduated with a BS last year and went straight into the program, so I just finished my first year. FI has changed majors a billion times, and is still in undergrad, so he transfer to a school near my university (not the same school I'm in) and will be finishing up his BA within the next year.

    We will be getting married in June 2012 (about a 2.5 year engagement) for a few reasons.  FI will have his BA and be working in his field of choice (hopefully!) and I will be just finishing my third year. In my program, the first year is classes, second is research and cumulative exams, and by your third year you're a doctoral candidate so you've only got research. I can't imagine full time wedding planning while I have exams going on once a month. This is what is working best for us, though not ideal since its a long engagement, it is for the best.

    Does your BF have any interest in continuing his education? Perhaps he could get a masters in the time you're still finishing undergrad, then you both can relocate where you decide to go to school?
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  • I would do either B or C. I know you don't like B, and I don't really blame you, but it may be hard to focus on your marriage and get a higher degree at the same time. I'm in my second year of law school and purposefully held off getting married until I graduate from there. But I don't know you personally, so you might be able to handle it, who knows?

    I would also suggest C because it seems that this one allows you to have the best of both worlds - you can get your degree and still live with your BF for now. Maybe when you're approaching your last year, your BF (by then maybe husband) will be in more of a position to move with you.

    Best of luck!
  • you really need to consider what you want to do after. For social work, you kinda need the masters, especially for a liveable wage, can you really do anything with the certificate? it may work if you're doing research and it would be over in a semester. I'm assuming you're still an undergrad, could you overlap some masters level classes? (my school lets me for some) worth looking into, that with summer classes you could have the masters quickly. ooor, see if any other schools have an online program more expensive but if he's really too established to move it might be worth it. Hope this helps I feel I'm constantly making new game plans (though we also have 2 kids)
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