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Rehearsal Dinner in Minneapolis

CatLuvr2011CatLuvr2011
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in Minnesota-Minneapolis and St. Paul
Hi!

My future husband and his mom had an argument this evening over the rehearsal dinner.  He wants to make it inclusive and invite out-of-town guests and she says that is not the tradition.  I think we should spend time with our out of town friends, too.  Any other transplants have insights on how inclusive rehearsal dinners are today?

Thanks!
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Re: Rehearsal Dinner in Minneapolis

  • tpender13tpender13 member
    2500 Comments
    I think everyone does it differently. Are the two of you hosting/paying for the RD? Then by all means -- invite your OOT guests. If his mom is paying and she doesn't want to shell out the money all those extra people, that's fine too. You could always just let people know by word of mouth that "We'll be at this bar on x-night at around 8 if you want to join us!" or "We'll be having brunch at x-restaurant the day after if you care to hang out with us before you head home."

    A couple points to think about...

    People coming in from OOT may appreciate some time to themselves. Perhaps they're thinking of the weekend of your wedding as a mini-vacation. If you invite them, they may feel obligated to come, and thus may have your wedding events taking up the entire time they're in town.

    Also, if you did invite OOTers, how many people would you have in comparison to your wedding? If you wedding is smaller and you'd end up having most of your guests also attending the RD, that seems a little weird. Also, if your wedding is smaller, you'll be more likely to have time to see and talk to everyone during the reception.

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  • Lang125Lang125
    100 Comments
    I'm from the TC but my fiance's family is from Chicago.  They will be throwing the rehearsal dinner and I'm sure they will invite some of the folks that are from out of town but not necessarily in the WP.  It is really their decision - I think we are expecting to have around 50 people or so.  I don't think there is any traditional guest list - it's the people you want with you the night before the wedding and who the groom's family is hosting.
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  • wittyschaffywittyschaffy member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    Our rehearsal dinner was for the wedding party plus our Grandparents.  My folks held a brunch the day after the wedding for out of town family and friends to come to their house and visit.  DH and I went to it as well.  Once everyone left, we opened our gifts.  If DH's parents had thrown something similar, we would have just split our time.  I thought it was nice to do it that way because we really got to spend time with them and talk with them - there was no wedding stress to worry about anymore because it was done!
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  • saintpaulJesssaintpaulJess
    500 Comments

    Our rehearsal and rehearsal dinner is Thursday night, because our venue does Friday weddings as well.  Just our wedding party and parents will be at the rehearsal dinner.  But my parents are hosting a picnic/barbecue on Friday night that will be for out of town guests.

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  • Cackle6Cackle6 member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments
    edited February 2012
    We're also having our rehearsal on Thursday due to our venue having weddings on Friday, and then we're doing an informal night out on Friday for anyone who wants to join us. Haven't figured out where yet, but someplace cheap and low key. That way it's more relaxed and not as formal as the rehearsal and you can get to spend more time with the out of town guests.

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