This is a second wedding for me, but first for my FI. Both are in our early 30s, no kids... except for the gestating one.
Which hasn't yet been announced to our families.
I'm a little upset because many of my relatives have indicated that they don't think second weddings are worth celebrating (While my immediate fam isn't this way, many people in my extended family are extrememly religious; many went to pretty great lengths to make it clear they wanted nothing to do with me after my XH left me. I no longer speak to these people and will not invite them to the wedding.) But even the extended family who were supportive during the divorce, are lukewarm toward the idea of FI.
It's between me and FI what color dress I wear; I also don't feel I should have to be subjected to criticisms such as it's inappropriate to have attendants/ceremony/reception/etc, or that my BMs are out of line to throw the shower they're planning. (Unrelated of course, but I didn't have a shower for my first wedding, not to mention that one right now would be helpful actually, since I recently lost a lot of household items when my building had a fire!)
Am I being unreasonable to be hurt by my fam's lack of happiness for us/lack of interest in getting to know my FI? Yeah, the world doesn't revolve around me, but just because I had a brief, childless marriage several years ago doesn't make him second class or or wedding completely inconsequential. Nobody broke up anybody's marriage; there will be no kids/stepkids "traumatized" by the existence of a new spouse, etc.
It looks like it'll be mostly our friends and FI's fam at the wedding, which makes me feel really badly... FMIL in particular is very sensitive, and I know will take that as a sign that my family doesn't accept FI.
Of course I can't change other people's behavior/attitudes, but I do need to vent! Words of wisdom or advice on how to not be resentful is appreciated.