I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.

aks0204 · April 2012

For most of our families, a date close to Easter break worked best. He is catholic and I'm not. I never gave it a thought to get married the Friday before Easter but after we've booked it it has been brought up. I'm sure we can change the datebut is that necessary? We are having a ceremony at the venue.

ceh789 · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_i-booked-our-wedding-on-the-perfect-date-and-it-happened-to-be-good-friday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:97dc92ba-4be7-49d7-8998-6b520cb9de82Post:ae573f57-77fe-4e28-9741-0b2648a26029">Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.</a>:
[QUOTE]I am Protestant, but I would not attend a wedding on Good Friday. It is just about as appropriate as getting married on 9/11.
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]
This. I was raised Catholic - currently attend a Lutheran church and I would seriously side-eye a Good Friday wedding. There's no way I would attend, but I'd also judge you like crazy - it's just not in good taste to party it up on the day Jesus died..

AdeleDazeem · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_i-booked-our-wedding-on-the-perfect-date-and-it-happened-to-be-good-friday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:97dc92ba-4be7-49d7-8998-6b520cb9de82Post:ae573f57-77fe-4e28-9741-0b2648a26029">Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.</a>:
[QUOTE]I am guessing that your FMIL and FFIL are Catholic, and they will probably be very upset to hear about your wedding plans. I am Protestant, but I would not attend a wedding on Good Friday. It is just about as appropriate as getting married on 9/11.
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

Hmmm... I think getting married on 9/11 or anything that celebrates life, happiness, and loved ones is a good thing for that date. Live, love and remember.

I understand that not everyone would feel that way, but I don't think it should be a universally banned wedding, birthday party, celebration date.

calliopeia2013 · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_i-booked-our-wedding-on-the-perfect-date-and-it-happened-to-be-good-friday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:97dc92ba-4be7-49d7-8998-6b520cb9de82Post:14565770-a3ec-4c93-929e-e6e7a43934f9">Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday. : Hmmm... I think getting married on 9/11 or anything that celebrates life, happiness, and loved ones is a good thing for that date. Live, love and remember. I understand that not everyone would feel that way, but I don't think it should be a universally banned wedding, birthday party, celebration date.
Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

I agree with this 100%- I think it'd be a terrible idea to blacklist 9/11 as a celebration date for the rest of history, almost an affront to the victims. (Also if we couldn't have weddings on any anniversary of a national tragedy, eventually there wouldn't be any dates left.) But I also think having a wedding on Good Friday is a bad idea. An important holy day of sadness has a different weight and meaning than the date of a historical tragedy- Good Friday is an event that people actually observe, via church services, fasting, etc. It's not about the date, it's about the religious observance.

At any rate, while I think 9/11 is the wrong comparison, I think if a significant number of people in either family are observant Christians (Catholic <em>or </em>Protestant, really, though especially Catholic), then the date needs to be changed. And even if that's not the case, OP needs to have substantially more fish/vegetarian options for meals than one probably would do otherwise.

Avion22 · April 2012

In Response to Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.:
[QUOTE]I can't imagine any practicing Catholics would support that choice. Not only would it be very inconvenient to have a party that's on a day of fast, I think many would decline because they're either in church, observing the holiday, or they find that having a wedding on Good Friday is a fairly large affront to many beliefs that they hold dear. I know it wouldn't fly in my family and if we tried to do that in DH's family, a large scale intervention would be staged. Furthermore, as a Catholic, is your FI comfortable being married outside the church? If he's not practicing then it may not matter so much to him but does he understand that there are fairly large consequences for marrying outside of his faith? He cannot serve as a sponsor for Confirmation or be a Godparent and technically he would be viewed as living in sin. If he isn't practicing this may not matter however if he isn't aware of this, he may want to think about it before he makes this decision. Bottom line: I'd make sure your FI understands this and I'd absolutely change the date.
Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]

We are getting married today. Both of us come from Catholic families (though neither of us are Catholic), and we obviously ran it by them before we set the date. I'm AD military and we traveled from the UK to get married in the States this weekend, so we didn't have a lot of options of weekends that we knew I would be able to get leave.

Our families supported our decision to get married this weekend. So far everything has worked out really well, but we have been VERY mindful of people's religious obligations this weekend. We had a rehearsal dinner picnic last night with fish tacos, and everything has pretty much been "open house" style so people can attend whatever services they want to attend this weekend. We did have a few friends and more distant family members who couldn't attend this weekend because of Easter, but we completely understand.

I think as long as you clear it with your famlies first, and are mindful of what the holiday means to people, it shoudln't be a problem. You may have people who are unable to attend, so just be ready for that.

RamonaFlowers · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_i-booked-our-wedding-on-the-perfect-date-and-it-happened-to-be-good-friday?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:97dc92ba-4be7-49d7-8998-6b520cb9de82Post:14565770-a3ec-4c93-929e-e6e7a43934f9">Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday. : Hmmm... I think getting married on 9/11 or anything that celebrates life, happiness, and loved ones is a good thing for that date. Live, love and remember. I understand that not everyone would feel that way, but I don't think it should be a universally banned wedding, birthday party, celebration date.
Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

I couldn't agree more, Joy.

I lived in a place where we had smoke clouds for weeks blown to us from Manhattan, and I spent most of that day convinced my dad was trapped or possibly killed because of a job he was scheduled to be doing at the time (Thankfully, that did not happen). I was in school that day with kids who were not as lucky as I was. If it's a day of mourning for you, personally, then I can understand wanting to avoid it like any other day of mourning in your family.

But if you're just avoiding the day for the sake of avoiding it, well, I hate to sound so Fox News Circa 2002, but seriously, if everybody takes the attitude that you can't celebrate anything on 9/11 because of what happened that day: the terrorists have won.

RamonaFlowers · April 2012

Realized I never actually answered the OP's question. I obviously can't equate 9/11 to Good Friday. However, if you and your FI set the date that you did, I'm assuming that being a practicing Catholic is not a priority for him at this time.

If his family is practicing, however, this can cause some issues, for the reason PP stated above. Since the day involves fasting and it is a day of mourning, there's a good chance that a lot of his family members will decline ... or if they attend not enjoy themselves very much. I would honestly ask his family how they feel about this ... and if it's an issue, move the date.

marshallra · April 2012

I was raised Catholic but have not been in church in 40 years except for funerals or other people's weddings. However i still feel quilty even going to work on good Friday nd would be uncomfortable at a wedding. I would change the date.

molly&dale · April 2012

For any practicing Catholic guests, all of Lent, but especially Good Friday, would not be an appropriate time to celebrate a wedding. This seems like it will cause big issues with his family. Other Christians would probably also have conflicts. I would say reschedule.

cbvcru67 · April 2012

Additionally, most practicing Catholics sacrifice or give up something during Lent - for many, this includes alcohol and/or sweets. Even if his family IS ok with you having the wedding on Good Friday, it would make me sad to think that the celebration I had worked so hard to plan and pay for would be tempered by people who couldn't fully enjoy everything I had planned for them (the entrees I selected, the cake we chose, the open bar we were paying for). For that reason alone, I would change the date.

alithebride · April 2012

lol you always have to have a variety of food to begin with so make sure to offer meatless pasta etc.. and other items that are lent friendly.

to me it wouldn't matter at all. if it works for you and FI then it's fine.

vexie · April 2012

Good Friday isn't just sacred to Catholics. I'm a protestant and that's a hugely significant day for my family too. I know people who have held their wedding on the saturday of the Easter weekend, but I can't imagine attending a wedding on Good Friday. You know your families and friends, though, and know if this will be an issue or not.

NJackson520 · April 2012

I think it is really a personal choice. Run it by his family and get their thoughts. I am a practicing Catholic and would not be offended by a wedding on Good Friday. While it is a day of remembering the sacrifice Jesus made, that doesn't mean we can't celebrate life. Everyone is different but if he or his family may be offended by it then it is probably better to change it than start off on the wrong foot.

I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.

Re: I booked our wedding on the perfect date and it happened to be good Friday.

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