My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....

Re: My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....

• MsYeck member

  

  March 2013

  Stop shaing that you are doing things with one and not the other.

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• Simply Fated member

  

  March 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_my-sistersmaid-and-matron-of-honor-do-not-get-along?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:143fddbd-e041-4263-97e9-ef63ffdc8b33Post:21ef52b3-91eb-4d60-95e7-929b359afb5f">My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....</a>:
  [QUOTE]Hi, Both my sisters, older than me whom I love to death, can not stand each other. They both have strong, controlling personalities, never agree on anything and for the life of me NEVER got along!! They consistently bring up "growing up" issues they never resolved as kids and as adults. Their fights/arguments are brutal! One sister, passive aggressive and one sister is very aggresive... Obviously they both play a major role in my wedding. I outlined their duties and now my sister, MatronOH is jealous of my other sister, MOH - she gets to do all the fun stuff with me. I've hired a Wedding Planner so I really do not want my sister, MatronOH, to assist in planning at all...   I am really stressed about their relationship and NO sisterhood between them. What shall I do???
  Posted by dinerosa[/QUOTE]
  Let your wedding planner take care of the wedding planning and you, your fiance, and the planner should be taking care of all the duties. That is what you are paying him or her for.
  Keep your sisters out of the planning process.
  
  You gave them duties, which is ridiculous to begin with, and one of them isn't happy with the list because apparantly you gave her the boring stuff. Can you blame her for being jealous that she gets the boring stuff while the other sister gets the fun stuff?

  
  

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• mrsbobfilson member

  

  March 2013

  How far away is your wedding? I dont know why you would ever ask them to be in your wedding expecting their behavior to change.If at all possible...kick them out of the wedding! get 2 civilized women who can bring class and less stress to YOUR day. If you don't your wedding day will be the worst stressful day of your life and not the beautiful day we all imagine!
  
  Many thought and prayers your way,you need them baby girl!!!

  

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• Viczaesar member

  

  March 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_my-sistersmaid-and-matron-of-honor-do-not-get-along?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:143fddbd-e041-4263-97e9-ef63ffdc8b33Post:d1230852-c4df-42e1-a42a-19f759d2cefc">Re: My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....</a>:
  [QUOTE]How far away is your wedding? I dont know why you would ever ask them to be in your wedding expecting their behavior to change.If at all possible...kick them out of the wedding! get 2 civilized women who can bring class and less stress to YOUR day. If you don't your wedding day will be the worst stressful day of your life and not the beautiful day we all imagine! Many thought and prayers your way,you need them baby girl!!!
  Posted by mrsbobfilson[/QUOTE]
  Dear lord, that is some awful, smelly advice.  Seriously terrible. 

  
  
  
  

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• Salsera29 member

  

  March 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_my-sistersmaid-and-matron-of-honor-do-not-get-along?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:143fddbd-e041-4263-97e9-ef63ffdc8b33Post:d1230852-c4df-42e1-a42a-19f759d2cefc">Re: My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....</a>:
  [QUOTE]How far away is your wedding? I dont know why you would ever ask them to be in your wedding expecting their behavior to change.If at all possible...kick them out of the wedding! get 2 civilized women who can bring class and less stress to YOUR day. If you don't your wedding day will be the worst stressful day of your life and not the beautiful day we all imagine! Many thought and prayers your way,you need them baby girl!!!
  Posted by mrsbobfilson[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>
  </div><div>I feel like this can't be real. Can you declare MUD when it's not the OP?</div>

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• AddieCake member

  

  March 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_my-sistersmaid-and-matron-of-honor-do-not-get-along?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:143fddbd-e041-4263-97e9-ef63ffdc8b33Post:d1230852-c4df-42e1-a42a-19f759d2cefc">Re: My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....</a>:
  [QUOTE]How far away is your wedding? I dont know why you would ever ask them to be in your wedding expecting their behavior to change.If at all possible...kick them out of the wedding! get 2 civilized women who can bring class and less stress to YOUR day. If you don't your wedding day will be the worst stressful day of your life and not the beautiful day we all imagine! Many thought and prayers your way,you need them baby girl!!!
  Posted by mrsbobfilson[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>WTF</div>

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• NYCMercedes member

  

  March 2013

  Back to the original post, what MsYeck said times ten. Stop involving them.

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• Jen4948 member

  

  March 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_my-sistersmaid-and-matron-of-honor-do-not-get-along?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:143fddbd-e041-4263-97e9-ef63ffdc8b33Post:0bcca76e-b677-433f-ab8b-92dcf3eace33">Re: My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....</a>:
  [QUOTE]Check her posts. She's giving nutty, godawful advice all over the boards. She endorsed a website that offers personalized underwear that says "put on your big girl panties" as a gift for her bridesmaids.  That's almost as bad as what Stage got for a BM's gift.
  Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]
  
  Ugh.  That's creepy.

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• ridedatbike member

  

  March 2013 edited March 2013

  Take it from a prior maid of honor when the bride seemed to be doing everything with the other girls and not me it was pretty hurtful. Bms only have a few duties as you must have heard here but if you're going to do wedding things with them dont be exclusive it just feeds the natural competetion between bridesmaids.

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• 32daisies member

  

  March 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_my-sistersmaid-and-matron-of-honor-do-not-get-along?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:143fddbd-e041-4263-97e9-ef63ffdc8b33Post:77bec8d2-0af8-43b0-b3b5-9ce52191d1ce">Re:My Sisters...Maid and Matron Of Honor Do Not Get Along....</a>:
  [QUOTE]Take it from a prior maid of honor when the bride seemed to be doing everything with the other girls and not me it was pretty hurtful. Bms only have a few duties as you must have heard here but if you're going to do wedding things with them dont be exclusive it just feeds the natural competetion between bridesmaids.
  Posted by ridedatbike[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>I was with you up until "natural competition". Then I started thinking about what a great/TERRIBLE reality show that would be, with all the bridemaids competing to be the MOH. Gawd, I'm shocked they haven't come up with this yet. Maybe I should call TLC.</div><div>
  </div><div>Anyhow, aside from some of the things PPs have mentioned, the thing that stuck out for me from the OP was the bit about how one sister is mad because found out the other sister gets to do all the "fun things" wih the bride. Well, why is that, then? Couldn't you try to have fun with each of them, if not at the same time? Because I'd be a little miffed if I was the "boring" sister.</div><div>
  </div><div>As for them... speaking as a person whose relationships with her sisters is very complicated... remember that their conflict is obviously long, two-sided, and not about you. Don't take it personally, but also, don't expect it to be swept under the rug just for your benefit. On the other hand, when they each agreed to be in the wedding, they were agreeing to behave as adults around each other, on that day. So hold them to that and let the rest go.</div>

  

  

  
  

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