He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?

joojoobean · August 2012

So...we decided on an outdoor wedding despite me always envisioning a church ceremony. He just asked the other day if he has to wear pants. Yes, it will be in July and scorching hot, but I'm affraid I will look ridiculous all decked out and he wearing shorts. Thoughts???

balletdawn · August 2012

We just had some friends do this. They got married outside in super informal ceremony-she was wearing a beaded, satin ball gown with pick-ups and he was in shorts and a short-sleeve shirt (although we were impressed it had buttons). They're kind of ridiculous like that, so it didn't surprise us at all, but I would've raised holy hell if my H wore shorts when I was all dressed up.

GoodLuckBear14 · August 2012

Are you sure he is not screwing with you?

joojoobean · August 2012

Thank you! My goodness. Maybe I can propose linen Tommy Bahama pants and then he can change later if he REALLY needs to. Geesh

joojoobean · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:1e747bee-273a-4f13-addc-0b55af9f7bb8">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]Are you sure he is not screwing with you?
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]

He was dead serious. He first said he needed nice, new fliip flops and I laughed and that's when he said "Do I have to wear pants?". It's outside, but it's not a beach wedding.

kikirst33 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:3a494c73-ffad-411c-9c04-b0dadad64bf2">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!? : He was dead serious. He first said he needed nice, new fliip flops and I laughed and that's when he said "Do I have to wear pants?". It's outside, but it's not a beach wedding.
Posted by joojoobean[/QUOTE]

<div>And I thought you were going to say he wanted to wear a kilt. Kilts are cool. Shorts? Eh.</div>

HobokensFury · August 2012

No shorts!

mrsbiss2be · August 2012

OMG! This just reminded me of what my FI asked me over the weekend!
We're having a destination wedding in Mexico and he asked if he could somehow where shorts. I shot him "THE GLACE" and the request ended there.
haha. But I knew he was screwing with my head.

IF he is dead serious, explain to him that you guys have to comprimise. Let him know how much you wanted a church wedding but because you love him so much you offered to have it outside. Ask him if he wouldn't mind comprimising for the day for you and then maybe later in the evening he and the groomsmen can dress a little more relaxed. Maybe you could even find yourself a super cute little white dress to change into!

Summer2011Bride · August 2012

If you're not OK with it (which you're not), then I would have a talk with him and see if you can compromise (maybe he can wear a lightweight pant instead of something thicker like tux pants?)

FWIW, we went to a wedding like this last year. B&G were really laid-back about the whole thing. She had a long bridal gown that wasn't over-the-top fancy but still not very casual and the groom and all the GMs wore khaki shorts and white polos. The bride was totally fine with it. Thats just the type of wedding they wanted. But like I said, since it's not OK with you, I would sit down and calmly talk about it with him.

ETA: Another compromise might be moving the wedding indoors.

joojoobean · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:0cf464ba-0899-43b9-a600-2309b2a08f71">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]You can always remind him that if an outdoor ceremony is too hot in pants, the church would be nice and cool.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

Haha. Perfect!!

cwaggoner07 · August 2012

We got married outdoors. In July. In Texas.
And H wore pants (but no jacket or vest).
There is no way he is too hot to wear slacks.

MrsKathyC · August 2012

When we were planning our wedding, all of H's family & friends asked if H was going to be wearing shorts. He's known for wearing shorts all year long, unless it dips down below zero. But no, he wore a tux, and was excited to do so! Yes it was sweltering hot, but you only get married once (hopefully).
Two of our guests showed up in shorts though..

Tabbie11 · August 2012

My FI decided he wanted to wear a Red Plaid Tux jacket at one point... he was dead serious, showed his guys, priced it out an everything. That dream was short lived though an he eventually changed his mind.

We are doing suits instead of tuxes and Jos A Bank has light weight suits that may be more comfortable.... That maybe an option? I like suits because then the guys have something after that may actually be worn again instead of spending the same amount on a rental.

emeejeeayen · August 2012

We're having an outdoor ceremony in August (will likely be 95+). I want the groomsmen in light grey casual suits. FI wants to be in tuxes. Not sure if I think that or the shorts is crazier.

Maggie0829 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:2a5eb0e7-abbc-4bbd-84cb-f5ae55c30c69">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]We're having an outdoor ceremony in August (will likely be 95+). I want the groomsmen in light grey casual suits. FI wants to be in tuxes. Not sure if I think that or the shorts is crazier.
Posted by emeejeeayen[/QUOTE]

Eh, I say if your FI wants to wear a tux then let him. I really doubt that he will be any hotter in a tux then he would be in a suit. Also, it isn't like he really had a say in what you would be wearing did he?

OP, I definitely say that shorts for wedding attire is a big no-no. I think you need to have a conversation with your FI about attire and let him know that you really would prefer pants. I don't care how casual the wedding is or how casual a wedding dress the bride is wearing, shorts are never ok for the groom to wear. It is not too much to ask for a groom to wear big boy clothing for one day out of his whole life.

emeejeeayen · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:e9e43301-6a38-4f78-9718-fc9c9a114c88">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!? : Eh, I say if your FI wants to wear a tux then let him. I really doubt that he will be any hotter in a tux then he would be in a suit. Also, it isn't like he really had a say in what you would be wearing did he? OP, I definitely say that shorts for wedding attire is a big no-no. I think you need to have a conversation with your FI about attire and let him know that you really would prefer pants. I don't care how casual the wedding is or how casual a wedding dress the bride is wearing, shorts are never ok for the groom to wear. It is not too much to ask for a groom to wear big boy clothing for one day out of his whole life.
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

<div>Well except he's going to be the groom equivalent of a bridezilla with his EIGHT OOT groomsmen. It would just be easier if they all wore nice grey suits they already own. Our wedding isn't fancy shmancy, and all my bridesmaids are just going to wear whatever grey dress they've got. But if he wants them all sweatin' in tuxes... haha</div>

jemmini6 · August 2012

It's 114 degrees today, and I'm wearing jeans, your FI can suck it up. LOL.

Seriously though, there are tons of lightweight fabrics that will be more than comfortable for the heat and still look appropriate. Besides, men's shorts are the length of women's capris, and at that point, you might as well just wear pants anyways as far as the 'cool' factor goes.

Maggie0829 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:687fba5e-6f6d-45c7-82aa-c63ae499c88d">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!? : Well except he's going to be the groom equivalent of a bridezilla with his EIGHT OOT groomsmen. It would just be easier if they all wore nice grey suits they already own. Our wedding isn't fancy shmancy, and all my bridesmaids are just going to wear whatever grey dress they've got. But if he wants them all sweatin' in tuxes... haha
Posted by emeejeeayen[/QUOTE]

All of my H's GMs were OOT except one. He just went to Men's Warehouse, picked a tux he liked and then had all the guys go to a local Men's Warehouse or seamstress to get measured. They picked up their tuxes one to two days prior to wedding. Really not a huge deal.

Also, do all of these guys have a grey suit? My H never wears suits unless he is going to a wedding (he does HVAC work so no need to get dressed up) and has a black suit. So if he was in your wedding he would have to either rent a suit or buy a suit that he most likely would never wear again.

I just think that, in this case, if your H wants to wear a tux he should be able to because it is his wedding too and he should have a say in his attire. Now, if he wanted to wear a speedo or PJs then that would be a different story.

LiLe422 · August 2012

My FI asked me if he could wear shorts (were getting married on the beach)...I told him if I bought a short wedding dress he could totally wear shorts, but if I bought a long wedding dress he needs to wear pants. I got a long dress...so pants it is!

emeejeeayen · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:e32c59af-da1f-43ff-8853-833767a4f87e">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!? : All of my H's GMs were OOT except one. He just went to Men's Warehouse, picked a tux he liked and then had all the guys go to a local Men's Warehouse or seamstress to get measured. They picked up their tuxes one to two days prior to wedding. Really not a huge deal. Also, do all of these guys have a grey suit? My H never wears suits unless he is going to a wedding (he does HVAC work so no need to get dressed up) and has a black suit. So if he was in your wedding he would have to either rent a suit or buy a suit that he most likely would never wear again. I just think that, in this case, if your H wants to wear a tux he should be able to because it is his wedding too and he should have a say in his attire. Now, if he wanted to wear a speedo or PJs then that would be a different story.
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>This man does not have Men's Wearhouse taste. But yeah, they all have suits or need to buy them for work. What FH <em>really </em>wants are white tuxedos. Very practical. </div><div>
</div><div>As far as my outfit, he doesn't know exactly what dress I'm wearing (because he doesn't want to), but I'm following specifications of what I know he likes/doesn't like. Day to day I wear a lot of outfits he dislikes (highwaisted jeans anyone?), but I don't want to walk down the aisle and have him be all,</div><div>

<a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/10/1/fab2a1c5-9bb2-4044-b17a-586414fc2b72.large.gif" title="Click to view a larger photo" class="PhotoLink"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/10/1/fab2a1c5-9bb2-4044-b17a-586414fc2b72.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>
</div><div>
</div><div>I think on this day we should probs care a bit about what the other thinks of what we're wearing then we can go back to p!ssing each other off one outfit at a time ;)</div>

emeejeeayen · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_he-asked-do-i-have-to-wear-pants-what?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:3360df12-b4cd-4ea3-80a7-5f0981194ab7Post:c7c162a3-0896-4ccf-80e3-ac7073c15f65">Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: He asked, "Do I have to wear pants?" What?!? : I don't understand how having 8 groomsmen from OOT rent tuxes makes him a groomzilla. Sorry, but I'm not seeing it. Tuxes are way easier to order OOT than BM dresses are (which are pretty darn easy) and each guy will still be paying the same amount whether there are 3 of them or 8 of them. Seriously, I'd let the guys wear tuxes if that's what your FI wants. DH was adamant about tuxes for June wedding even after we switched it to daytime. I figured his side, his choice so we went with it. It was fine. We did get full vests so the guys could remove their jackets after the ceremomy if they wished.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

<div>Sorry, I should have been more specific. He wants expensive tuxes and fully believes his groomsmen will all want to BUY them. (<em>Why wouldn't they want to own a tuxedo?!</em>)</div><div>
</div><div>(And the 8 matters because it's 8 humans' opinions to take into consideration. Just easier to make a smaller group happy than a larger one.)</div>

AdeleDazeem · August 2012

We married in Bermuda. I think you can only pull off shorts at a formal event if it's in Bermuda. Here's our videographer!

lumilumi · August 2012

If he wears shorts, then you should wear a short wedding dress. It doesn't sound so bad if your wedding/venue isn't formal.

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