Oh dear.
So, I have four friends (2 couples) who are going through separations/divorces right now. Both couples were integral in the beginning of my relationship with my FI. Any suggestions for figuring out invitations?
For one couple, the guy is the best man. He says he's on good terms with his now ex, and they're both seeing other people now, so we can invite her if we want (and her plus one?). They live in Indiana (we're in NYC -used to live in IN) where the wedding is. His (ex) wife had been off Facebook for years for professional reasons and just got back on a few weeks ago, so I've really only seen her three times since we moved away 2 years ago (2 Christmases and their wedding), and don't really feel up to date on her life at all. And she doesn't even have her last name (which had been her husband's name) listed, so I don't even know if she's changed it back yet or not. I know the obvious answer is to just ask her, but I don't know ANY details of their separation, and don't want to pry.
Now, this couple is the reason my fiance and I are together. When we were just friends, they invited us both over to their house for board game night, and it was the night we all went out for drinks to celebrate her birthday that we first hooked up.
Should we invite her/ her plus one? (The guy is obviously going to be there since he's the best man. He said he'd be fine either way, but I don't know if he was just saying that because it's what he thought we wanted to hear.)
The other couple are our friends from college. The girl in this couple is the person who introduced us. She and I were really close in college, and my fance had a crush on her at the time (until he met me and saw how I was a much better choice for him!). She DJed weekly dance parties, and that's how my fiance and I MET. Her (ex) husband was part of our group of friends, and we were all really close in college. I was the MOH in their wedding. They live really far away, and as of last year, are separated - I think. I only get to talk to her occasionally on Gchat, but we're the kind of friends who can pick right back up wherever we left off whenever we do see each other. We've certainly grown apart over the years, but I'd like them to be at the wedding. But I don't know how separated they actually are. Based on Facebook interactions, they seem to at least be friendly, but I know they're not living together.
So how do I even go about asking about this (if I should invite them both, are they dating other people, would it be weird to see the other there with a date?!?) If it would make either of them uncomfortable for the other to be there with a date, I'll only invite one of them.
I'm trying to be sensitive in that they're all probably not having the best feelings about marriage right now, so I don't want them to feel like I'm flaunting our wedding to them.