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Unmarried couple, Different address

WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl member
First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
in Wedding Invitations & Paper
Having looked here  and online, I can't seem to find how to properly address our invites for my friends with SO's but who don't live together.  For example, I'd like to address an invite to my cousin and his girlfriend but it seems strange to put "Bob Cousin and Bob Girlfriend" on the envelope when she doesn't live at his address.  Any suggestions??  Thanks!!

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Re: Unmarried couple, Different address

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    cebrady89cebrady89 member
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    Etiquette will say send two separate invitations, but this is commonly a gray area.

    Are you using inner envelopes? If so, what you should do is address the invitation to "Bob Cousin" and on the inner envelope write "Bob Cousin & Bob Girlfriend". Then you would not need to send her an invitation

    If you are not using inner envelopes, two invitations (one to each of the people) is preferred, but you could get away with addressing one invitation to both people if your budget is tight for invitations.
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    WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    We don't have inner envelopes, and budget isn't an issue, but I've never actually met her (we don't see this cousin a lot) and have no address for her.  I could get it from him, but I'm not sure she'd know exactly what it's for if she received one.  The not knowing her is throwing me otherwise I'd just send her one.  

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    cebrady89cebrady89 member
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    Oh, yeah that complicates things. Are you sure she wouldn't recognize you and your fiance's names on the invitation? 

    If she really would have no clue who you guys are, then you could just send an invitation to the cousin and include her name on it as well. I'd try finding out her address first. The cousin could always tell her to be on the lookout for the invitation so she'd know what it is.
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    tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Old-style etiquette says two invitations, but I've never actually seen that done and personally think that would be really odd. I would address the envelope to:

    Mr. Bob Smith
    Ms. Jane Doe

    and send it to his address. Typically the woman comes first, but in a case where the man is your cousin, you've never even met the woman, and you're sending it to his address, common sense would dictate his name first. 
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    CarleyBoCarleyBo member
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    We had this issue since we were the first in our group of college friends to tie the knot.  Traditionally you 'should' send it to each person individually if they're at different addresses, but for those I didn't have addresses for, I just put both their names on the envelop and mailig it to the adderss I knew/had.  If I had had inner envelops I probably would have done it differently.  Either way, I don't think your cousin or his girlfriend will be offended.   

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    ehenry010ehenry010
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    I would send it to the person you're closest to (in this case your cousin) but address it to both of them:

    Mr. Bob Smith and Ms. Jane Doe
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    GreenEireGreenEire
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_unmarried-couple-different-address?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:46617101-c02b-4c12-8661-3b1ef4275466Post:cb5fcf58-7232-447a-ac0a-415ab244ef8f">Re: Unmarried couple, Different address</a>:
    [QUOTE]Old-style etiquette says two invitations, but I've never actually seen that done and personally think that would be really odd. I would address the envelope to: Mr. Bob Smith Ms. Jane Doe and send it to his address. Typically the woman comes first, but in a case where the man is your cousin, you've never even met the woman, and you're sending it to his address, common sense would dictate his name first. 
    Posted by tenofcups4me[/QUOTE]

    This.  Neither H nor I knew H's uncle's girlfriend and neither of us is close to H's best man's fiancee.  So we sent the invites to the uncle and friend, but included the girlfriend and fiancee's names on the envelopes.  Nobody seemed to mind and both ladies came.
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    becka717becka717 member
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    Having been with my FI for seven years before we were even engaged, and not living together that entire time, we have received several of these invitations.  Even his aunt sent the invitation to his house only.  I think the best format is:
    Bob LastName
    Bob's Girlfriend
    Bob's address

    If you connect Bob and his GF with an "and" it implies they are married, so the names should just go on separate lines.

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    WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Thanks ladies!!  Hopefully these will go out before the end of next week!!

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