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Cutting wedidng expenses

SonaliPopSonaliPop member
First Comment
in South Asian Weddings
I think the best thing you can do for yourself when wedding planning is begin by writing a list of everything you want and at a later date, going back and looking at how you can save and what you can do without.

Like, what place does a boquet have in a Hindu wedding for us Hindu brides? Do we need one? Do our bridesmaids?

Instead of being carried in, can we walk into our ceremony?

Can we borrow nice cars (BMWs and Mercedes) from friends who own them and ride in those to our wedding and just pay for a nice car to leave with after the wedding, as a couple?

Can we forgo pricey flowers and stick with what's in season and doing our homework ahead of time to make the most out of the beautiful, fragrant flowers that won't destroy our budget?

Can we keep some ceremonies at home, like a mehndi night in your back yard or living room?

What did you guys decide to go without? What did you leave out of your big day that you initially were planning on.
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Re: Cutting wedidng expenses

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    SonaliPopSonaliPop member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Er, sorry Cutting WEDDING Expenses! Typo!
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    raangoliraangoli
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We cut a lot of things from our wedding that we didn't need to have.  We didn't have a traditional baraat, so there was no need to rent a horse or higher end car. Of course not everyone can do without a baraat, but if you do have one, I think you had good suggestions for borrowing a car that a friend or family member might have.

    Do you really need a nice car to leave in? I guess that depends on whether you are leaving the ceremony site or not. If you're not leaving the ceremony site and your reception is held in the same place, you've eliminated the need for the "getaway" car.

    As for flowers, going for what is in season is always recommended. A lot of people may not like what's in season, but it will help bring down the floral budget. Or you can always go the non-floral route and use candles etc., if your venue will allow.

    I had a very low key mehndi night at my parents house and only invited immediate family. This fit with my personality and some people might want to have a larger event, but it's a good way to keep costs in check.

    We DIY'd a lot of our paper such as invitations, programs, menus, seating cards, etc. That saved us A LOT of money and made it more personal.

    I didn't have a doli (they scare me) and I walked down the aisle. I'd even go so far as to suggest ditching the pricey ceremony shoes. We don't need them during the ceremony and you can put that money towards your shoes for the reception (or wear the same pair for both). It turned out that my feet shrank (still can't figure this out) and my shoes for the ceremony were too big! I ditched them since I was afraid of tripping down the aisle. It was fun to be a barefoot bride down the aisle (and no one was the wiser)! Of course this may not be an option if your aisle is outdoors...

    I think another big place to potentially save is wedding jewelry. Gold is a lot more expensive these days so instead of buying all new sets etc., why not repurpose some that you already have or borrow your mom's? Or there are beautiful costume dulhan sets lately that blow real sets out of the water. I wore a costume set with a set I already owned and it worked out well for me.

    I am sure there is more stuff, but I can't think of it right now...

    Oh but I did have a bouquet. I have no idea what the purpose/meaning behind carrying one is to begin with, but I loved the idea of having one :)
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    mimosa1977mimosa1977 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ok..so here are a couple of suggesstions which we have entertained at one time or another but you, your fiance, and both of your parents shoudl figure out what is most important:

    1.  Having your wedding during the off season, on any day except Saturday, or during lunch time

    2.  Invitations:  If DYI are not your thing - stick to simple designs and stick to traditional standard envelope size (saves on postage)

    3. FoodWise:  stick to chicken as your option for nonveg entrees and/or apetizer, some halls have an option of primeium bar vs standard bar vs wine/beer only.  The win/beer and standard bar options are usually cheaper.

    4.  Centerpieces:  have a couple of really nice ones that are placed near the dance floor and will look really, really, pretty in pics.  Place simpler ones on the outer tables ( I recently went to a wedding in which this was done - it looks gorgeous)

    5.  Clothing:  window shop, window shop, window shop....if you can go to india if not look around for a couple months before you decide what you want.  For the smaller events like mendhi, sangeet, or garba if these are at home try to find an outfit from a friend, cousin, or your mom.

    6. I am doing without a doli or bharat but that is b/c neither is very imporatant to our families. 

    7. See if you can reuse your ceremony flowers for centerpieces.  Mandap- these are sooo expensive and in my opinion not worth it but its tradition to have the ceremony under it.  See if you like somehting without the pillars or crystal look but something with pipe & drap--- some of these are very pretty if you get the right person to do it....

    Ok..these are just some thoughts...
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    andamuandamu
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My wedding was blended (secular American + Gujarati Jain) so bear that in mind - we were able to skip things like renting a doli or a horse because we had an American-style ceremony and then a smaller puja the next day.

    1. Cake-wise: fondant is ex-PEN-sive.  We had a cake big enough to feed about 50% of our guests and then the rest were served from sheet cake.  (Dummy cakes are not that great of a money saver, as the decoration is what is expensive.)

    2.  Veg meals are cheaper.  Our venue had minimums, so while we didn't save money per se, we got a more lavish meal than they would have served for the same price containing meat (sweet shots at the end, action stations, etc.).

    3.  Order invitations from India.  Square is more expensive, I think.  The quality of the invitations you get in India is hard to match for the same price in the States.  I didn't go to India, but I ordered mine online after looking at some samples, and it was really easy.

    4.  Get shoes you will wear again!  I wore gold sandals (flats) to my wedding, and I know I will wear them again, which is worth the amount I paid.
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    temurlangtemurlang member
    Combo Breaker First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    You all have some very practical ideas!

    Because our Hindu wedding was in India, we automatically didn't have a lot of the things people here have just because it's not done in India.  My mehndi was in the guest house we stayed in, and it was small, casual, and just for the women to get mehndi put on.  There were no bouquets, BMs, etc., because those aren't traditional.  The only thing that we actively had to choose not to have was an elephant.  We could have afforded it, but DH thought it was really embarrassing, unnecessary, and too traditional.  We had a lot of pressure, but in the end we both came together by car.

    For our Christian ceremony here, there were a number of things we really saved on.  It helped that my taste is pretty minimalist, so I honestly didn't feel I was doing without anything I really wanted.

    We used our own car.  Really, I don't even like limos.  If your car isn't in good shape, someone you know must have one you could use.  And it really doesn't matter.  Our car was only in pictures by choice, but it's not like people go outside to look at it.

    We didn't have a giant WP.  Besides the drama and managing all those people, if they all need flowers and participation gifts it will add up.

    We kept flowers to a minimum.  I really am a minimalist and I don't even like the idea of cut flowers.  We had just as much as we needed:  bouquets for me and MOH, boutonnieres for the boys, two arrangements for the church, one for the head table, and some for the cake.  My mom DIYed very simple centerpieces.  Personally, I think seasonal flowers tend to look more "in place" than something really exotic, and I don't really like orchids in December (it looks stuffy and fake to me).

    Alcohol can be a major expense.  My family is very conservative, so they wouldn't let me serve hard liquor.  Wine and beer are much less expensive.

    We ended up using an iPod.  We weren't able to find a good DJ who could do the right mix in our price range.  The iPod worked out great and we had the perfect balance of genres for our crowd.

    DIYing stuff takes time but you can save a lot of money and end up with exactly what you want.  I DIYed our invitations and even though they weren't very cheap, I got a much better quality product than if I had bought them.
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    bridetobeeebridetobeee member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    -Buying clothes, invitations, programs, jewelery in India is a huge money saver and worth the plane ticket there
    -Try huppah companies to build a mandap or pipe and drape. Also, use gazebos if venue has one to save cash there. You can even rent portable gazebos in some cities!
    -Use centerpieces as aisle decor as well as table decor
    -Skip on album and see if you can get it done in India or another less expensive website
    -Don't pay for whole day photography. The latter end of the reception is all dancing and after a couple of dancing shots, I don't know if you need your photoigrapher to stay
    -Try Staples for wedding programs after creating your own template
    -DIY favors, get aunts, uncles, cousins to help, candy favors are useful and inexpensive
    -get wedding cake from Costco..heard it tastes great and is less expensive
    -get a non-traditional venue so you can rent it for an entire day for a lower cost
    -skip goat, lamb, seafood
    -DIY guestbook and money box and placecards
    -skip flowers for centerpieces
    -see if you can buy inexpensive non-flower centerpieces
    -use your own car. Nobody even saw which car I came in or left with because guests got there after I did (I came early for pictures) and the wedding and ceremony were in the same place so I was the last to leave the reception

    Hope this helps and the girls above have awesome tips too!
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    Rainbow17Rainbow17 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    This is a great thread!

    I'm cutting a lot out.

    -I'm not gonna have a mandap, but only simple drapery suspended from above
    -no barat
    -no transportation
    -one dress for ceremony and reception
    -no bridal party
    -no mehendi
    -no sangeet (only dinner with immediate famil night before)
    -no ultra brand name shoes (no one can see your feet)
    -no flowers besides centerpieces (centerpiece flowers will be used for ceremony)
    -dummy cake
    -will not be carried into ceremony
    -no throne chairs for reception
    -couldn't afford trip to India, went to Jersey, spent only $1000 on dress and accessories (including entire jewelry set)
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