Unplugged weddings

tophexie · December 2012

For our special day I would love for it to be unplugged. No people getting in the way of my photographers or a random arm sticking out in the aisle. I'm think either a sign at the ceremony of even a small blurb on one of the invitation inserts. I possibly even want to include it on our website.

Any advice?

Simply Fated · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:f58f6d66-a7e1-4da5-9331-71af3f913b71">Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]For our special day I would love for it to be unplugged. No people getting in the way of my photographers or a random arm sticking out in the aisle. I'm think either a sign at the ceremony of even a small blurb on one of the invitation inserts. I possibly even want to include it on our website. Any advice?
Posted by tophexie[/QUOTE]
You mean you don't want people taking pictures during the ceremony?
I'd probably leave that off the invitation. Maybe a small sign at the ceremony? Or someone could make an announcement?

[Deleted User] · December 2012

I think a sign or an announcement would suffice. Putting it on a website or invitation is a bit overkill. If people aren't going to listen, putting it in more places, and ahead of time, isn't going to make them do so.

FWIW, I don't think it'll be a huge issue for your photographer. I'm sure that he/she deals with people taking photos all the time and knows how to still get a good shot even if someone has a cell phone out. Even if people do ignore the sign or the announcement, you'll get good shots. You could even end up with something cute like this (<----click)

achiduck · December 2012

I would have a sign at the entrance to your ceremony or put it in your programs (if you're having them). You would also have the officiant make an announcement before the processional starts.

beardownbchs · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:e11b54e5-f9d2-4f85-af7d-98f4f44bc242">Re: Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]You could even end up with something cute like this (<----click)
Posted by vonclancy[/QUOTE]

<div>THAT is adorable. </div>

KellyBrian2013 · December 2012

And I also wouldn't expect people not to take photos at all. Asking to turn off cell phones and/or no flash photography use one thing, but no pictures at all is another. Many people don't want to pay thirty bucks for a candid of you walking down the aisle when they can take their own and print it for less than a dollar.

Jen4948 · December 2012

Good luck with that. You can ask people not to take calls on their cell phones, but asking them not to use their cell phone or mini digital cameras to take pictures of you is probably going to be as successful as putting the moon on a gift registry.

Avion22 · December 2012

I think it's okay to request no photography during the ceremony if it's for spiritual reasons (ie: no photography allowed in the sanctuary). If your photographer is allowed to take photos, then obviously your guests are allowed to do so as well. Any good, experienced photographer knows how to position themself to get good photos without people jumping in the way.

As for the rest of your wedding, I think it's rude to prohibit guests from taking pictures and using smartphones, unless, again, the venue prohibits it for whatever reason.

LeiselEB · December 2012

A simple sign would be fine. But I would expect that some people won't bother to obey the sign. Your photographers should be used to working around people to get the shots they need, anyway. Plus, I know I appreciated having some snapshots from friends before I got to see the photographer's set of images. Even if people do take some pictures, you could get some benefit from it

NOLAbridealmost · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:5ff05f3c-2fe6-469e-8692-f62538194edf">Re: Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]I think it's okay to request no photography during the ceremony if it's for spiritual reasons (ie: no photography allowed in the sanctuary). If your photographer is allowed to take photos, then obviously your guests are allowed to do so as well. Any good, experienced photographer knows how to position themself to get good photos without people jumping in the way. As for the rest of your wedding, I think it's rude to prohibit guests from taking pictures and using smartphones, unless, again, the venue prohibits it for whatever reason.
Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree with this. </div><div>
</div><div>I think it's just pretty AWish to do the 'unplugged' wedding thing. It just implies that grown adults aren't capable of behaving appropriately while they witness your wedding. </div>

jessicabessica · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:a35341dc-c6fa-46cf-a0cc-6e795593688c">Re: Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Unplugged weddings : I agree with this. I think it's just pretty AWish to do the 'unplugged' wedding thing. It just implies that grown adults aren't capable of behaving appropriately while they witness your wedding.
Posted by NOLAbridealmost[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree. I have seen this at a wedding - the officiant asked that everyone be "present" and not on phones (taking pictures or otherwise). It was a little insulting, and it did not work, because people took photos anyway. And it was not a situation where the venue prohibited photography. </div>

AdeleDazeem · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:a35341dc-c6fa-46cf-a0cc-6e795593688c">Re: Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Unplugged weddings : I agree with this. I think it's just pretty AWish to do the 'unplugged' wedding thing. It just implies that grown adults aren't capable of behaving appropriately while they witness your wedding.
Posted by NOLAbridealmost[/QUOTE]

This. The entire tone of the OP and the idea are very condescending to me.

HSAmber · December 2012

I would actually call that the opposite of AW-ness. She doesn't want guests taking pictures, they shouldn't be taking them. I've been to several weddings where I can't see because someone in front of me is holding up a cell phone. I think a sign or announcement is fine. If people don't comply, that's incredibly rude.

JoanE2012 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:f58f6d66-a7e1-4da5-9331-71af3f913b71">Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]For our special day I would love for it to be unplugged. No people getting in the way of my photographers or a random arm sticking out in the aisle. I'm think either a sign at the ceremony of even a small blurb on one of the invitation inserts. I possibly even want to include it on our website. Any advice?
Posted by tophexie[/QUOTE]

I wouldn't bother. People are not going to listen. Photographers will know how to deal with this and still get amazing photos. And you'll be so in the moment that you won't even realize that people are taking photos.

Summer2011Bride · December 2012

I would just have a hard time telling my siblings, parents and close friends they can't take photos of my wedding. Now siblings may be in the WP, so I can understand not wanting them snaping shots while standing up with you, but my parents and in-laws got some amazing photos since they were right up front that I could see immediately and not wait two months to get.

We had tons of people taking photos at our wedding. I did not notice them, nor did they get in the way of our photographers, who are used to dealing with guests taking photos. I think implying that snapping a picture of you kissing means a guest isn't "involved" or "focused" on the ceremony is kinda crappy and not even necessarily true. I can also see saying no flash photography or having a reminder to silence phones, but outright banning photos when they can see your photogs snapping away is taking it a little too far IMO. If I go to someone's wedding who I am very close to, I would like some photos as a momento and don't think it's right to have to pay out the wazoo and wait two months to order through your professional photographer. Just my 0.02

tophexie · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:5d17357a-39dd-44bd-b35d-3a33d56c436f">Re: Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]No one pays attention to the website, so don't bother. I'd make a sign at the entrance of the church and have the officiant make an announcement. Anything past that is overkill and might make people do it out of spite. I'm one of the people who don't think it's rude and really regret not doing it myself.
Posted by Harry87[/QUOTE]

Honestly, I'm going to put a sign up our photographer has asked us to inform our guests that they should be the only ones photographing the wedding and to avoid shots that will be messed up (ie a hand that is sticking out of the aisle.)

tophexie · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:5ed9561e-ddae-4a7e-9f6a-ce583bcaeb4d">Re: Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]I would actually call that the opposite of AW-ness. She doesn't want guests taking pictures, they shouldn't be taking them. I've been to several weddings where I can't see because someone in front of me is holding up a cell phone. I think a sign or announcement is fine. If people don't comply, that's incredibly rude.
Posted by HSAmber[/QUOTE]

IA. I don't do it at other peoples weddings so why shouldn't I have the same respect at my wedding?

Avion22 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unplugged-weddings-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d676842c-0b2c-49ea-b812-f37a7d7937bfPost:650e331f-05fc-46c1-95df-1132e1752af2">Re: Unplugged weddings</a>:
[QUOTE]Ask a member of your church staff to make an announcement prior to the start of your ceremony. This takes it off the couple. You can also put a note in your program. To those above: some people still consider a wedding to be a sacred event, not a theatrical production. It is not rude to ask people to "unplug." What's sad is that it is necessary to ask them to do so. Photography is not allowed during ceremonies at my Lutheran church, and there is a sign at the entrance at the sanctuary that asks people to please turn off cell phones. Announcements ARE made prior to wedding ceremonies, by a member of the church staff. They are very strict about this.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

<div>Retread, I completely agree about the solemity of a ceremony, and that church policy is one of the few good reasons to ask people to "unplug." </div><div>
</div><div>But asking people not to take their own photos because it might get in the way of a professional photographer is right out. If my photographer had asked me to put a sign up asking my friends and family not to take their own photos, I would have hired a different photographer.</div>

jenferian · December 2012

On our wedding website, for the "Ceremony" section, I put a blurb about wanting our guests to enjoy the ceremony and allow our photographer to capture the moment.

For me, we're having a full Catholic mass. Out of respect for the church, the sacrament of marriage, and just the solemnity of the surrounding, I personally do not want anyone except the photographer snapping pictures. I cringe when I think of a friend or family member snapping a photo on their iPhone and tagging my FI or I on Facebook during our ceremony. There are certain moments in my life that are personal and special and I don't want snapped and plastered all over the place. I'm all fine and dandy with the reception, but not the ceremony. I think it's perfectly fine to request guests not take pictures during any part of the ceremony.

Also, no pictures of the bride going up on Facebook before the ceremony either! At my little sister's wedding, a bridesmaid took a photo and uploaded it to Facebook RIGHT BEFORE THE CEREMONY. I never asked the groom if he saw it, but when I saw the photo on FB before my sister even walked down the aisle, I was totally appauled. Completely disrespectful.

Few events are sacred anymore. Not everyone wants their lives exploited. It's cool if you want to capitalize on life milestones, like fiming the birth of your child for a reality TV show, but not everyone does.

For me, my wedding is sacred. It's a private moment to be shared between my FI, me, God, the Church, and our families and close friends. I don't want the world sharing in my wedding ceremony. I don't think it's too much to request guests put away their cameras out of respect for us.

Giaspo · December 2012

I went to a wedding once where the church was historic and didn't allow flash photography. There was a sign, the priest mentioned it and it was in the program. The church was dark and non-flash photos wouldn't come out. It just about killed me to refrain from taking photos of one of my closest friends getting married. It was fine, just a little disappointing. Why don't you want photos taken? PPs are right; the photographer and video guy know how to shoot around people (or ask them to move). Also, some of the best shots were from friends and it was great to wake up the next day with a ton of pics in our inbox.

Unplugged weddings

Re: Unplugged weddings

Choose Another Board

Search Boards