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catholic deacon...

mck776mck776
First Comment
in Connecticut
im not catholic but my fiance is-- he would like a representive there from the catholic church (we are having an outdoor ceremony). Im methodist so Ive already got my pastor, but I can't seem to find anyone that is willing to do an outdoor ceremony any suggestions?

P.S we both live out of state and his family is from new jersey that is  why we are having trouble finding someone.
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Re: catholic deacon...

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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Comment
    I believe the Catholic Church only recognize marriages in the Church by a priest so I'm not sure having a representative from the church will make much difference.  Did you post this on the Catholic board?  The ladies on there might be able to answer your question better.  Good Luck :-)
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    mck776mck776
    First Comment
    see i have no clue, my FMIL says that a deacon will be able to come but what ive read, it seems that isnt possible, because it wont be recognized at all because it isnt in the church and i dont think she gets that
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    Katred08Katred08
    First Comment Combo Breaker First Anniversary
    you can probably find someone to come and "bless" the marriage, but it's my understanding that it won't be recognized by the church, and your fiance won't have gotten the sacrament of marriage if it's anywhere but a Catholic church, performed by a Catholic priest. 
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    Jaridds68Jaridds68
    First Comment
    If you want the marriage to be recognized as catholic, there are specific rules to follow - in a church, with a priest. For extenuating circumstances, like the groom is jewish and his family doesn't feel comfortable in a church (my situation), some (it's rare but it can happen!) priests will preside at a wedding that is outside of the church and it will 'count'. You're looking for a deacon, not a priest, but it could be just as hard to find a deacon willing to do this.

    If you just want a catholic representative, and it doesn't matter if the marriage is catholic then you should check out CITI Ministry - they are married 'catholic' priests. I use quotes bc they are not official, they are not recognized by the catholic church. They tend to be more open, and for you they could be a great way to have the catholic side represented for your fiance. Through word of mouth recommendation I discovered Father Rich, we aren't going with him though as we (finally) found a Catholic priest to do our ceremony out of the church. Good Luck!
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    kateroachkateroach member
    First Comment
    As I understand it, a Catholic deacon can preside at a wedding outside of a church as long as both of the people getting married AREN'T Catholic. If they're both Catholic, it needs to be in a church. My fiance is jewish and I'm catholic so we're having a rabbi and a deacon (who happens to be a family friend) on a farm. Have you tried calling Catholic churches near your wedding location?
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    banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited January 2012
    What aspect is important to your FMIL and FI? How you two get married has large ramifications on his state of grace in the Church.
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