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North Carolina
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Advice for the DIY Bride

Liz and Ryan 2010Liz and Ryan 2010 member
10 Comments
in North Carolina
My mom and did a lot of things ourselves.  We made buckets of flowers for hanging on shepherds, the centerpieces, programs, tags for the favor, ring bearer pillow.  We had a great time but...

Ryan's (husband) family is from out of state and we wanted a BBQ for the rehearsal dinner.  We had it catered at a park.  BIG MISTAKE!!!!  My mom and her friends ended up doing all of the work.  Ryan's dad paid for it but my advice is this--just go to a restaurant then you don't have to worry about setting up/cleaning up etc.  Granted if your MIL is around town and has done a rehearsal dinner before it would probably be ok.  Also Husbands fam i s from South Africa so they have no idea what should be done for rehearsal dinner.

We decorated the vineyard ourselves with the help of maids and mom's friends--it looked good and did not take too long.

TENTS-My coordinator had some 10X10 pop up tents that she rented to us for about $40 for 3 tents.  The vineyard also had one which the DJ was going to be under.  Well on June 12th there was a severe thunderstorm and all the white tents except one was destroyed in the storm.  The only one that made it did so b/c my dad went out there to hold it down!  I have a great dad!  So I would say go ahead and pony up the $300-400 to a rental company.  If the tent gets destroyed it is on them not your parents to replace.

I feel like maybe my mom didn't have as much fun b/c she had to help clean up afterwards.  

So if you have the money maybe getting married at one of the expensive places where they do everything is better.  My mom and I did have quite a bit of fun getting ready for the wedding but it was a lot of work.
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Re: Advice for the DIY Bride

  • manda4pawsmanda4paws
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    i agree.....i have said all along if you have family coming from out of town don't ask them to help and don't expect them to....not only is it rude, most people that come from out of town are going to make a "vacation" out of it and aren't going to pitch it b/c they are there to relax

    usually you can pay caterer extra to set up and take down.

    also, how is it that you had a coordinator but you and your moms till ended up decorating? that should be something she took care of
    Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic Amanda & Chad Bio Barefeet & Paws Blog Vacation
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  • GirlieGirl27320GirlieGirl27320 member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for sharing! 

    Leigh Anne & Billy
    *October 2nd, 2010*
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  • Liz and Ryan 2010Liz and Ryan 2010 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Well my coordinator works for Davie High School and was one of my teachers.  She had to do graduation that morning.  Also for $25 bucks and hour I would rather do it myself.
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  • stefanyjoystefanyjoy member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I just want to share my story -- a few weeks ago I flew from NC to Napa Vally in CA for my cousin's wedding (groom). They also had a "DIY" wedding and NOTHING was included in the facility rental except for four walls and a key. The rehearsal dinner, wedding & reception were all held here. My sisters and I had to do EVERYTHING. The bride had NOTHING set up, nothing planned, no direction, etc. We had to set everything up, tables, chairs, put centerpieces together, infinate decorations, drinks, the list was endless, and also pretend to be servers through the entire wedding (no bartender, no servers, just a crabby DJ and a "friend's mom" as the overwhelmed caterer) for the wedding of 150 people. The night before the wedding I was up until 2am putting her crappy centerpieces together and driving around to every 24 hour store in existance to get last-minute items. My sisters and I had been talking about how excited we were for this trip and to see our long-distance California family for MONTHS AND MONTHS. On the wedding day, my sister had to pull me out of the venue because somewhere during the clean up process I was so overwhelmed and exhausted that I started to bawl. All this for an unorganized "DIY" bride whom I had only met a couple of times previously. I had no warning before I stepped on that plane that I would be the un-paid help who had to cancel all other sight-seeing plans on the trip in order to help the bride. If I would have known how much work it would be I would never have spent $400 on a plane ticket to go to their wedding.

    Bottom line: Do NOT put your loved ones through the hell of having to put your wedding together. Hire able bodied teenagers if you need to, just DON'T put your family and friends through what I went through.
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  • Liz and Ryan 2010Liz and Ryan 2010 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree and that was very rude of the bride.  I will have to say most of the DIY my mom and I did.  We certainly did not "put any guests out."
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