Just Engaged and Proposals

Just got engaged. Not sure where to go from here.

On October 25, 2012, my best friend and love at first glance proposed to me in a secluded area of the park where we'd be away from the world. I've only been with him for 5 months and i'm only 21 years old, my parents gave him their blessing to ask me although they didn't approve. They like him but they're concerned since it's been such a short courtship. No one's really discussed what I'm supposed to do in the first few months of being engaged with me so I didn't know if anyone has been in my shoes before and has any ideas?

Re: Just got engaged. Not sure where to go from here.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_just-got-engaged-not-sure-where-to-go-from-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:21ca1370-555b-4c1e-a3f3-4942b325a4ccPost:c96d937e-9606-40c4-9e0a-7b477112c360">Just got engaged. Not sure where to go from here.</a>:
    [QUOTE]On October 25, 2012, my best friend and love at first glance proposed to me in a secluded area of the park where we'd be away from the world. I've only been with him for 5 months and i'm only 21 years old, my parents gave him their blessing to ask me although they didn't approve. They like him but they're concerned since it's been such a short courtship. No one's really discussed what I'm supposed to do in the first few months of being engaged with me so I didn't know if anyone has been in my shoes before and has any ideas?
    Posted by katpbride[/QUOTE]

    I think your top priority right now would be to figure out how long of an engagement you are going to have. And if I were you I would be having a very long engagement. I think it would be wise to take things very slow: you are young and don't know this man very well (how old is he?). I don't blame your parents for disapproving: they are likely worried about you! (though it doesn't quite make sense to me why they would give him their blessing to propose if they don't approve of him/the relationship...)
  • KatWAGKatWAG Chicago member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_just-got-engaged-not-sure-where-to-go-from-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:21ca1370-555b-4c1e-a3f3-4942b325a4ccPost:c96d937e-9606-40c4-9e0a-7b477112c360">Just got engaged. Not sure where to go from here.</a>:
    [QUOTE]On October 25, 2012, my best friend and love at first glance proposed to me in a secluded area of the park where we'd be away from the world. I've only been with him for 5 months and i'm only 21 years old, my parents gave him their blessing to ask me although they didn't approve. They like him but they're concerned since it's been such a short courtship. <strong>No one's really discussed what I'm supposed to do in the first few months of being engaged with me so I didn't know if anyone has been in my shoes before and has any ideas?
    </strong>Posted by katpbride[/QUOTE]

    If you are old enough to get married, you should be old enough to figure this out. HInt: Goggle wedding timelines.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I was 20 with my FI proposed, but we had been together since I was 14. I would say you should just enjoy being engaged. By the time we get married, we will have been engaged for almost 3 years. There is nothing wrong with a long engagement to solidfy you relationship. I suggest going to the students board, the girls over there tend to be younger. 

  • You don't need to go anywhere. 1) Figure out when you want to get married. (1 year? 6 months? 3.5 years? Never?) 2)Relax! Enjoy engagement! 3) plan according to your timeline.
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • I would consider a very long engagement if I were you.  My FI and I were also young and hadn't been together long, and our 17 month engagement has been totally worth it.  We were able to save up a good bit for the wedding and afterwards, and we went through a lot of things that can test relationships.

    Every relationship is different, and no one online can tell you what to do about yours.  I would google wedding timelines first.  Then just enjoy being engaged, and seriously consider having a long engagement.  The length of your engagement can affect the pace at which you plan.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker PersonalMilestone
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_just-got-engaged-not-sure-where-to-go-from-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:21ca1370-555b-4c1e-a3f3-4942b325a4ccPost:911deefa-38ac-46b3-97b7-cc5aa2b0df2a">Re: Just got engaged. Not sure where to go from here.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Just got engaged. Not sure where to go from here. : If you are old enough to get married, you should be old enough to figure this out. HInt: Goggle wedding timelines.
    Posted by KatWAG[/QUOTE]

    I also agree with this advice. It shouldn't be impossible to figure out yourself.
  • Well the good news is we set the date for October of 2013, so I've got a good long year. I'm hoping everything lays out right. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_just-got-engaged-not-sure-where-to-go-from-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:21ca1370-555b-4c1e-a3f3-4942b325a4ccPost:c96d937e-9606-40c4-9e0a-7b477112c360">Just got engaged. Not sure where to go from here.</a>:
    [QUOTE]On October 25, 2012, my best friend and love at first glance proposed to me in a secluded area of the park where we'd be away from the world. I've only been with him for 5 months and i'm only 21 years old, my parents gave him their blessing to ask me although they didn't approve. They like him but they're concerned since it's been such a short courtship. No one's really discussed what I'm supposed to do in the first few months of being engaged with me so I didn't know if anyone has been in my shoes before and has any ideas?
    Posted by katpbride[/QUOTE]

    *Congratulations!!!  As this is about to be the most beautiful and stressful times of your life.  While the wedding will be fun, the more important thing is to plan for your marriage.  First things first let's get some important details squared away to allow you some breathing room.  (1) Living arrangements for you and your fiance.  Will you be moving in right away?  If not, when and where will you live?  (2) Determine a budget.  Think of it this way, $10K wedding would cost you $1000.00 for 10 months.  From your budget, determine a date.  If you have a budget that may take longer to achieve, consider having a longer engagement. Talk to parents and in-laws to discuss their amount of input financially to your nuptials. (3) Decide if you will use a Notary Public as your officiant or a Church official.  Many churches offer and require pre-marital counceling.  (3) HAVE FUN! The more you can include your parents and show how happy you and your fiance will be, the more comfortable they will be with your decision.  You do not have to prove anything to anyone, but you catch more flies with honey!  Become an open book and be open to suggestions.  You are the bride, and your decsion trumps suggestions from others, but be welcoming to ideas, you might even get one you like! :-) *
  • I second everything Kjb said :)  Date, budget, then start digging through the internet and magazines to start getting ideas :)  It will be the most fun and the most stressful time, I can agree with that!! ;)  We got engaged after two months, but we're a bit older so while the disapprovals were there from a few people, they were minimal.  Good luck! :)
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • Honestly your age shouldn't matter. The fact that the relationship has been on the short side is a bigger factor. Majority of the people I know dated at least a year before getting engaged then at least another year for the wedding. 

    I think you should take your time. Not sure what your beliefs are but maybe you two could try living together for a while. I tell so many that you honestly don't know someone till you live with them. I think if you're not oppose to that idea you should discuss taking that step in your relationship. Good Luck sweetie and congrats on the engagement.

    Oh btw my aunt and uncle only knew each other for a total of 1 year before they got married and they've been together for 22 years.
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