Another question to the married knotties - in honor of FFF...

bsn1752 · July 2010

What are some of the things that you see the newbies doing/planning that make you just want to scream "JUST TRUST ME"?? What things drive you crazy about the girls planning... now that you've been through the whole ordeal?

fallbride1109 · July 2010

I don't see it on this board much but head table discussions crack me up. It's 15 minutes out of your life, tops. Just sit people where it makes the most sense logistically. And contrary to popular belief, no one really looks at you anyway--they are busy eating and visiting.

No one will notice if your groom's shirt is white or ivory. No one. Nor will they care. Ditto on the color of the carpet in your venue.

If you skimp on photography, you will most likely regret it.

Airbrush makeup is worth every single penny.

Mariah&Steven · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_another-question-married-knotties-honor-of-fff?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:e96a7cde-c781-4246-9ee3-d448de313307Post:d8c71a6e-5efa-4db2-8981-de3dabcb51ef">Re: Another question to the married knotties - in honor of FFF...</a>:
[QUOTE]If you skimp on photography, you will most likely regret it.
Posted by stephiehall[/QUOTE]Seriously.

Tiffany618 · July 2010

Hmm...

I don't know what it is about brides, but they seem to lose touch with reality when it comes to booking vendors. Contracting with any vendor is a business deal. Do you make business deals in real (non-wedding) life without researching, asking all applicable questions, and having everything in writing in advance?

Probably not.

bobbileighb · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_another-question-married-knotties-honor-of-fff?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:e96a7cde-c781-4246-9ee3-d448de313307Post:d8c71a6e-5efa-4db2-8981-de3dabcb51ef">Re: Another question to the married knotties - in honor of FFF...</a>:
[QUOTE] Ditto on the color of the carpet in your venue. Posted by stephiehall[/QUOTE]

This is the one thing that when I see nice weddings they can honestly be ruined for me by the carpet. Its one of the first things I notice about the reception. Platinum weddings kill me with million dollar weddings and hideous carpet. I am likely the minority though.

cherrrylll · July 2010

People thinking the tiniest details are worth stressing over or wasting money on. Things like envelopes and hand canceling and favors and whether the mom's match or not.
You just have to think back to all the weddings you've attended and think about what you remember from it and what stood out and what you didn't notice or remember at all. I honestly wouldn't ever remember an envelope that an invitation was sent in or what kind of stamp was used on it or what kind of jewelry the BM's wore.
I usually walk away from a wedding remembering the overall decor, lighting, if they had a good DJ and how pretty the bride looked (invest in good hair and makeup!). Good food is always a plus for me since most weddings have mediocre food.

amberpro · July 2010

stephie and cheryl nailed a lot of mine

It also cracks me up when I see girls stressing over their FI's involvement. Like, "OMG- FI wouldn't pay attention when I was trying to ask him about bridal party tees and whether or not I should have votives or petals on the tables." He doesn't care, and I don't blame him.

Also- colors. Why would you ask other people to pick out your colors? No, it doesn't have to match the season, it needs to match your venue and your taste. And Internet strangers most likely don't have the same taste. Google and see what YOU like, not what I like.

Also- newbie PWs.

FWIW- Most of these things are what bother me on other boards. We had so many newbies in and out on our month board that it started to pass the "sigh, eye roll" and move into annoying.

Mariah&Steven · July 2010

What are newbie PWs?

I also think that a bad colored carpet can ruin things....I've seen some pretty fugtastic carpet colors in churches and was like, "no way, Jose!".

I TOTALLY agree with Cheryl on the matching MOB and MOG dresses or trying to match to the colors of the wedding. I personally didn't care about stuff like that. Unless it's not some crazy flaming red or neon yellow, I didn't care what color dress my mom and MIL picked out to wear. No one pays that much attention. And it looks fine in the pictures.

I wish I hadn't spent so much time on our invites. They just got thrown away....and I wish I hadn't spent so much money on personalized M&Ms. I wish I'd just donated to a charity for favors.

I too don't understand why people come on here asking for people on an internet board to pick out their wedding colors. I understand trying to get an opinion the colors you've choosen...but make your own decisions. It's your wedding, not ours. Do what YOU want. Have the flowers that YOU want. Have the colors that YOU want. Eat the kind of cake YOU want.

fallbride1109 · July 2010

I wish I hadn't done favors period. They weren't worth the time or expense. And when I asked about them when I was planning, people said don't do them and of course I didn't listen.

amberpro · July 2010

PW- post wh**e

Just girls that come in and open several threads in a row over pointless things or questions that can be answered by lurking. I know you can ignore threads, it always just made me roll my eyes.

llc2011 · July 2010

We brides to be wouldn't get this kind of good advice if the married ladies didn't stick around after their weddings

amberpro · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_another-question-married-knotties-honor-of-fff?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:102Discussion:e96a7cde-c781-4246-9ee3-d448de313307Post:2bf5b147-79a7-4900-a3b2-103b617445ca">Re: Another question to the married knotties - in honor of FFF...</a>:
[QUOTE]I wish I hadn't done favors period. They weren't worth the time or expense. And when I asked about them when I was planning, people said don't do them and of course I didn't listen.
Posted by stephiehall[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I didn't do favors. It got scrapped at the last minute and no one even noticed. SO glad I didn't waste my time/money. As a matter of fact, the banquet captain at Cityplace said almost no one did favors there anymore.

</div><div>I say don't do them- spend the $$$ on better food :)</div>

ewinkler1977 · July 2010

I skipped out on favors as well. No need as hardly anybody takes them.

I wouldn't worry about all the little things. That gets too stressful and no one really remembers or knows anything about that.

I also agree don't skimp on the photography. I really wouldn't go with someone just because they are they cheapest. Really do the research and if you find someone who you really like then go with them and just rearrange your budget. These pictures will be the only thing you have to look back on. Oh and to add on to this, have your photographer follow you back to your hotel and take some pictures there. We did and it was totally worth it.

Also, I do advise getting a dj even though I didn't and streamed music through an ipod. Well that is, if getting people on the dance floor is important to you. We had a few people dance but really not a whole lot. Our groomsmen did a good job mcing the night but I've been to weddings with really good djs and its just not the same.

We also could have nixed the programs. They aren't necessary and in my mind we could have spent the money elsewhere.

But the number one thing I advise of brides is to just let everything go, forget the stress, and enjoy your wedding day. Have fun and take everything in.

Donnaaries · July 2010

I'm sorry but I think things like personalized napkins, personalized water bottles, and all that stuff is largely a waste of extra money and time (if you DIY).

No one notices that stuff. And if they do, the impression lasts 2 seconds and the item goes forward to serve its purpose (quench thirst, wipe mouth, etc).

Jay&Marissa · July 2010

Gaps aren't that big of a deal.

Airbrush makeup is wonderful

Don't blindly trust certain vendors-- />like me

A good DJ makes all the difference

Terriniski · July 2010

On the colors - I understand wanting to pick colors that you personally like, but it drives me nuts when I see wedding photos in which the BM dress color looks horrible on one or more girls. Granted, depending on the diversity of your bridesmaids, you might have trouble getting a color that looks good on all of them, but it can be done. Don't make someone wear something that looks downright tacky just because you think bright orange is just awesome.

mandasue178 · July 2010

You nailed most of mine. My current pet peeve is whining because you can't afford your dream wedding. Either get over it or put it off until you can afford it. Your parents and future in-laws don't owe you a thing. They raised you and your fiance, and even if they didn't, there aren't laws of parenting that say that have to pay for your wedding. Drop the sense of entitlement and be thankful for what you have.

I'm also feeling pretty mean lately though.

juliebug1997 · July 2010

Mandasue,
I'm with you on all the whining.

BanannaP · July 2010

You know I read all of this, and I totally get everything you're saying. But I know that I'm still going to do programs and favors. Maybe I'll regret it, but I still want to do them. Maybe these are realizations every comes to later on??

mandasue178 · July 2010

Banana, I don't regret the programs at all, other than the ribbon tying. That I regret. But the programs themselves were very reasonable for me. I might have spent $50. I also don't regret my favors, but we just did a simple candy bar.

Terriniski · July 2010

Ditto on the programs - I was glad I did them. I always like looking at programs when I get to weddings, and sometimes I wish they were a bit more substantive to give me more to read when I get to the ceremony. So I was glad I did them.

fallbride1109 · July 2010

I regret favors because I went overboard. I did a candy bar and champagne bottles--either one alone would have been plenty. But honestly, my wedding would have been beautiful without either one also and I could have spent the money elsewhere. And of course it's something you realize later on. No one could tell me otherwise when I was planning either.

juliebug1997 · July 2010

We felt like we really needed to do programs. We were having a mass at our wedding and were having quite a few non-Catholics coming to the wedding. We hope that it was a guide for them as to what they should have expected.

Donnaaries · July 2010

Do the programs, just don't do 1 per guest. Do programs for about 50-60% of your head count, because not everyone will take one (and couples usually share). That way you can cut back on your printing costs but still have programs.

linzcw04 · July 2010

Airbrush is sooo worth it!!
Don't skimp on the photographer and try your best to get a video...even if it is a raw, unedited one you will cherish it! Trust me...lol....even if "Uncle Tommy" does it there's nothing better than seeing what it actually looked like (you won't remember most of it!)
Make time for yourself and your new husband - the night will fly by so quickly and you will be pulled in so many different directions so make time for a last private dance or something equivalent.
Spend time on the small things...but not too much! Many people will not notice or care about certain things but some of the tiniest details can really make it special so seek those out and forget the rest.
Live and let live....mistakes will happen, people will get lost or out of order, something may be said wrong and there's a good possibility vows may be misspoken due to nerves....really who cares?!?! You are marrying the love of your life and will remember the day you said "I do" - not how it sounded.
Lastly....HAVE FUN!!! Let yourself go - you've been planning for a year (more or less) now and it has all come together. Pat yourself on the back and celebrate your new life together!

fallbride1109 · July 2010

I can't believe I forgot this one. If I could only say "Just TRUST me!" on one subject it would be: do a reveal. I don't care how old-fashioned you think you both are, you won't regret it. Ben and I are as about as traditional as you can get and we couldn't be happier we did one. It doesn't change anything about the walk down the aisle--my heart was still pounding through my chest as I got ready to go out even though I had seen him 2 hours before. It's the STRESS that melts away afterwards, not the excitement.

Another question to the married knotties - in honor of FFF...

Re: Another question to the married knotties - in honor of FFF...

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