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Poem for Honoring a Loved One

vixenfirebrightvixenfirebright
First Comment
in Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
I've recently lost 3 immediate family members and wanted to have them honored at my wedding. I'm going to have a table set up with 3 roses and a couple pictures. I wanted to include a poem as well but am having a hard time finding something that isn't depressing. Is there anything that you can suggest that wouldn't be too depressing, but conveys that they are loved and never forgotten?

I don't want it to be morbid or set a bad tone for the day, I just want it to be tasteful and remind everyone that they are still with me, especially on my wedding day.
Any ideas?
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Re: Poem for Honoring a Loved One

  • slubkinslubkin member
    500 Comments
    That's tough-  I empathize.  I lost my mom 7 years ago, and some of this whole wedding planning stuff is really emotionally hard without her, since moms seem to be such a big part of a bride's planning.

    I was planning to have a picture, etc or something to acknowledge her, but I am not sure I would include something in the ceremony itself.  Not because I think it can't be tasteful, but because I feel it's more appropriate to focus on the fact that we are celebrating getting married than to dwell on the people who can't be there (my FI lost his father when he was a kid, so we are both missing parents). 

    Maybe you can also consider setting aside chairs in the front row with pictures of the people who would have been sitting there?  Or put a brief note and (flattering) picture of each of them at the end of your program to acknowledge them?
    "Plus who needs a purse when you have a wedding dress? Those things are like walking hobo bags just waiting to be stuffed with surprise treasures." -Wedinator.com image
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  • jorgemega10jorgemega10 member
    100 Comments
    Although we are separated physically, faith and love have bound us eternally.Though we cannot see them, we know they are here.
    Though we cannot touch them, we feel the warmth of their smile, as we begin a new chapter in our lives.    We know that they’ll be happy to see our wedding day. They know that we have found true love and we will be okay.Today we pause to reflect upon those who have shaped our character, molded our spirits and touched our hearts. A representation of the everlasting impact they have made upon our lives.
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  • balasjbalasj
    100 Comments

    I think the table with pictures and roses is a nice idea.  Not sure if your intention was to read the poem of just print it perhaps on the program...  I do worry it would be a little too morbid to read a poem and make a big deal about it.  But something simple like "With us in Spirit today..." and listing the three names at the end of the program would be ok.  My friend did that as his father passed a few years prior to his wedding. 

    If you are having a religious ceremony or mass etc, perhaps have the officiant make a special blessing or moment of silence - they would probably know what to do to remain tactful.  I have seen this done at the beginning of the ceremony where friends of the bride and groom were ill and last minute had to decline coming to the wedding and the priest said a special word.  

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  • vixenfirebrightvixenfirebright
    First Comment
    Thanks Jorge! That is beautiful!

    I was going to have the poem printed out in a frame on the table with photos. I don't want to have anything mentioned during the ceremony for fear that I will bawl my eyes out.

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