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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Alcohol/Open Bar

Hi All,

My fiance and I are intersted in a venue very much, but it's one of the places where you have to buy your own alcohol...

My question is, instead of buying a TON of different alcohol, is it acceptable to have a small variety of wine, beer, and then a few signature cocktails, and that's it? It would just save us on having to buy a TON of DIFFERENT stuff :)

Any thoughts/suggestions greatly appreciated!

Re: Alcohol/Open Bar

  • Thats a really good idea. A lot of couples do that to save money! =)

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  • Yep, that's perfectly fine.  I would have a menu up at the bar that says what is available, and if your friends and family are known for drinking certain things do your best to provide them.
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  • Yes, as a guest I'd be more than happy with that.
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  • That would be perfectly acceptable.  I am not sure how your friends and family are but when me and my friends go somewhere with a full open bar we tend to have drinks that we normally wouldn't because they are free and available.  Typically we all drink either beer or wine (and are perfectly happy with that) so the only time we drink anything different is when it is offered.

  • That's exactly what we're doing.  We're doing a wider selection of wine and beer than we might otherwise (6 beers and 5 wines) plus a signature cocktail.
  • I specifically looked for a venue where I could buy my own alcohol and I saved a ton of money that way. We had one red, one white, and one sparkling wine, three types of beer and that was it. We got the wine at Whole Foods for $3 a bottle and the beer was from Total Wine. We only spent about $400 on booze for a wedding of 100 people. I think it worked out very well. 
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  • That's fine.  I wouldn't worry too much about having certain things you know people like, unless it's something most of the group likes.  You'll go nuts if you try to have everyone's specific preferred drink.
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  • That is fine.   We brought in our own alcohol also.

    Personally I think you should get

    Beer - 2-3 kinds with at least one being a domestic light (coors light, miller lite, bud light)
    Wine - at least a red and wine.   2 options of either would be better
    Rum   ---------------
    Vodka               l
    Whiskey            l    of these don't get the expensive stuff, but I would not get the cheapest
    maybe a gin? --- l    either


    If you get everything above along with coke, diet coke, sprite, club soda, tonic, OJ, Pinapple, Cranberry  99% of your guests will have something they will like.  There will always be 1 who will not find something.  There always is.

    ** personally I'm not signature drink fan as your only liquor option.   If you are already going to make a drink with say rum.  I don't understand why you would not let your guests just get a rum and coke.  More than likely they would prefer that anyway.  Just my opinion. 

    Check with your store.  We were allowed to return all unopened bottles.  It made ordering less stressful because we knew we could return stuff that was not used.



     






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Oh my gosh, thank you all SO much! These are very helpful answers! Laughing
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_alcoholopen-bar?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:aa1d2cff-aede-4852-b175-61507ca8f703Post:8ddaad0e-efb7-4235-86f7-5d663ba5c24f">Re: Alcohol/Open Bar</a>:
    [QUOTE]That is fine.   We brought in our own alcohol also. Personally I think you should get Beer - 2-3 kinds with at least one being a domestic light (coors light, miller lite, bud light) Wine - at least a red and wine.   2 options of either would be better Rum   --------------- Vodka               l Whiskey            l    of these don't get the expensive stuff, but I would not get the cheapest maybe a gin? --- l    either If you get everything above along with coke, diet coke, sprite, club soda, tonic, OJ, Pinapple, Cranberry  99% of your guests will have something they will like.  There will always be 1 who will not find something.  There always is. ** personally I'm not signature drink fan as your only liquor option.   If you are already going to make a drink with say rum.  I don't understand why you would not let your guests just get a rum and coke.  More than likely they would prefer that anyway.  Just my opinion.  Check with your store.  We were allowed to return all unopened bottles.  It made ordering less stressful because we knew we could return stuff that was not used.  
    Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

    Actually, this does make sense to me too... And the great thing is, all the Juices, Soda's, Mixers, etc. is PART of my food package at the venue I am interested in, so I only have to buy the alcohol. Maybe we will just have a signature drink as an option and then let people do their thing as well.... Maybe it we just have a menu up, people will be less likely to order other stuff, and then IF they do, it'll be OK :_
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_alcoholopen-bar?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:aa1d2cff-aede-4852-b175-61507ca8f703Post:c620265e-3317-427c-8686-10fb6e75f295">Re: Alcohol/Open Bar</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Alcohol/Open Bar : Actually, this does make sense to me too... And the great thing is, all the Juices, Soda's, Mixers, etc. is PART of my food package at the venue I am interested in, so I only have to buy the alcohol. Maybe we will just have a signature drink as an option and then let people do their thing as well.... Maybe it we just have a menu up, people will be less likely to order other stuff, and then IF they do, it'll be OK :_
    Posted by stephy71185[/QUOTE]

    <div>When I bartended I found most people will drink something from the list I provided.     Sure Mary might prefer a appletini, but if's not available she will drink a vodka and cran.  </div>






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Do wine, beer, and a signature drink and you will be fine!  You are so lucky your venue lets you bring alcohol!  Such a savings!

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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_alcoholopen-bar?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:aa1d2cff-aede-4852-b175-61507ca8f703Post:8ddaad0e-efb7-4235-86f7-5d663ba5c24f">Re: Alcohol/Open Bar</a>:
    [QUOTE]That is fine.   We brought in our own alcohol also. Personally I think you should get Beer - 2-3 kinds with at least one being a domestic light (coors light, miller lite, bud light) Wine - at least a red and wine.   2 options of either would be better Rum   --------------- Vodka               l Whiskey            l    of these don't get the expensive stuff, but I would not get the cheapest maybe a gin? --- l    either If you get everything above along with coke, diet coke, sprite, club soda, tonic, OJ, Pinapple, Cranberry  99% of your guests will have something they will like.  There will always be 1 who will not find something.  There always is. ** personally I'm not signature drink fan as your only liquor option.   If you are already going to make a drink with say rum.  I don't understand why you would not let your guests just get a rum and coke.  More than likely they would prefer that anyway.  Just my opinion.  Check with your store.  We were allowed to return all unopened bottles.  It made ordering less stressful because we knew we could return stuff that was not used.  
    Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]


    I completely agree with all of this.  Beer and wine plus rum, vodka, whiskey, (and maybe gin/scotch/bourbon depending on your guests' preferences) and these mixers should satisfy 99% of the people there.  This list (plus champagne) is exactly what we're getting for our BYOB venue, per our caterer's recommendations.  Check out Trader Joe's for wine! 
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  • It's perfectly fine to do that.  Try to figure out what would please the masses and go for it.
  • Totally fine! Another tip (sorry if it was mentioned, didn't see it) - see if you can find a place with a return policy on unopened bottles. That way you don't have to worry if you buy too much and have like, 12 bottles of vodka sitting around because it wasn't used and you don't like vodka or something.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_alcoholopen-bar?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:aa1d2cff-aede-4852-b175-61507ca8f703Post:dc610c6b-c006-4e3d-b6ec-5ec63755d367">Re: Alcohol/Open Bar</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Alcohol/Open Bar : When I bartended I found most people will drink something from the list I provided.     Sure Mary might prefer a appletini, but if's not available she will drink a vodka and cran.  
    Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

    Thank you so much! and BTW - The dog in your signature is SO ADORABLE! :)
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