I am SO over this pressure...

Re: I am SO over this pressure...

• VarunaTT member

  

  February 2012

  In all seriousness, you need to simmer down and breathe.  Maybe seeing a counselor for a few sessions would help, because you are spinning yourself in circles.

  
  

  Make a list.  Deal with it one thing at a time and fling off the things you can't do anything about and start practicing some responses:

  
  

  "I'm sorry, but we don't know the date yet.  I will update you as soon as we know.  Until then, [change subject]".  Repeat as often as possible or end conversation.

  
  

  Go see an OBGYN re: fertility.  No one can answer that for you except a doctor.  See if you can get in sooner rather than waiting.  If you're so worried about the DEPO, stop taking it, there are other birth control options available to you.

  
  

  Go see PCP for a prescription for when you fly that'll calm you down.

  
  

  You can always book something for an event, it just might not be the vendor you specifically want.  But, there's nothing you can do about that, so instead of stressing about that, use your energy to work on letting that worry go.

  
  

  And honestly, none of this stuff should matter one bit until you get yourself healthy again.

  
  

  I'm ingnoring the paying statement, b/c it's just too much.  If your family is offerning money with strings attached, you take the money and strings or you don't.  There's not really an in-between.

  �

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• amandamarielynn

  

  February 2012

  Counsellors just charge me to tell them how I feel. I have friends for that... I don't need lessons in how to calm down, I need some sort of coordinator that won't hang up on me because they don't work with Muslims so I can have a person who knows where the eff to start on this whole mess... If I had a DIRECTION to go in, it wouldn't be bad. But right now, it's like everything's being dumped on me at once and IDK Which the hell one to try and sort out first...
  
  I've got an OBGYN appointment scheduled, but since I'm not sexually active NOW, she doesn't seem that interested in talking to me about it. And it's hard to stop the depo when it's a 3 month injection and it's already IN there. I'm due for another one in a couple months, but IDK what other BCPs I can take since I've failed on pretty much everything with the endo. The only thing that works for me is Lupron and they only allow 2 doses ever LIFETIME (wasn't aware of that when I got on there) and I've had them. I'm thinking they'll probably want me to start orthocyclin again and do a surgery right before the wedding to clear it all out.
  
  I'm really trying to relax and get healthy, but I live with family and I get this every day. I'm considering telling them to call the government offices themselves to ask about visa progress. And as far as my PCP goes... I'm getting anxious thinking about going to her, lol. Last time I was there, she'd fired all the Muslim staff to replace with her church members and they harassed my mother and I about our faith the whole time. Not to mention the doctor, while I was in there for mum's checkup, had me watch these "Muslims are all Jihadis" propaganda videos (offensive as Hell considering that jihad isn't the word for 'holy war' and she's an Arabic speaker who should know that...). I'm worried she's going to bring her MALE priest into the room when I'm uncovered again to pray over me unsolicited. I'm thinking I should ask another one of my specialists for it instead.... Now that I think of it, I may be able to ask my pain specialist for it.
  
  
  I'm not picky about vendor, as long as I can describe what I want and get it done. It's just the closer you get to a date, the higher chance they'll say "No, we're booked then." And my religion has specific days that are best for a wedding. So I'm trying to waffle back and forth on dates.

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• MNNEBride member

  

  February 2012

  Ok, there are many things to comment on this post but I'll stick to one.
  
  You need to find a PCP that is respectful of your religion and lifestyle.  No health care provider should be subjecting you to watch "propagada videos" or be bringing a priest in to pray for you when you are uncovered and without your permission.  These things are unethical and should be reported to your local medical society.

  

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• PMeg819 member

  

  February 2012

  Your doc needs to be reported to the medical board. That behavior, especially having a male priest enter the room during an exam is unprofessional.

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  February 2012 edited February 2012

  Take care of your own personal needs first, before you start sharing your life with another.
  
  If you think a therapist is a waste of money, check out a relaxation class, tai chi, yoga. all of these can be beneficial to your health.
  
  Find a doctor who will meet your needs and make you comfortable--one that will see you as a human being first. Not one who will quote statistics or spout religious stuff. Get off the invasive, mess with your hormones birth control as quickly as you can.
  
  Once you find one, have them recommend that you talk to a dietician. Altering your diet to the medicine you are taking and to increase your fertility can be one step into making you feel better in general.
  
  Take one day at a time.  And communicate your needs to your family.  You are no good to anyone if you're sick or depressed. 
  

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• amandamarielynn

  

  February 2012

  I think I will report her... I mean, the whole reason I haven't before is the fact that in my city, if a Muslim complains about something then they're a CAIR-hugging fanatic trying to force the people into Shariah... But given all this, I think I will. And I have an appt with a pain clinic, so I think that I can ask her for something this week while she's checking my progress from shoulder surgery.
  
  Thanks, guys.

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