Stress!!!

owengirl996 · June 2012

How are you all dealing with it? Any suggestions?

I feel like my emotions are out of control! I think my new "diet" (just counting every single calorie) is not helping and making me extra grouchy lol Plus it's almost that time of the month (although I screwed up my birth control this month, so who really knows, but it HAS to get back on track in the next month!!!) so that's adding to it as well.

I have been such a witch lately and broke down crying, and apologized to FI this morning for being so mean lately. Of course he said I wasn't, etc. He has been sick all week, too, which ended up being hard on me as well because he'd wake up coughing, so I'd end up on the couch...with three cats jumping all over me!

Oh, and on top of everything, my aunt just got diagnosed with cancer on Thursday. Ugh. I'm super close to her too, and her daughter, my cousin, is my pregnant BM. They are doing a hysterectomy in a couple of weeks, so just praying that gets it all.

So...help! What are you doing to help the stress??? WR or NWR at this point!

Eliz77 · June 2012

I know what you mean...I have a couple non-wedding related things going on to contend with and it's been very hard to focus on the wedding planning. I've also been cranky and feeling guilty about it. I handle stress kinda poorly, by acting like it doesn't exist, so when it boils over it really boils over. I have a couple hobbies-riding horses and training dogs, so that really helps me kind of escape and just relax. The reality is the wedding is one day of your life, not even a full day! Other aspects, such as family health is so much more important (my Grandma has been in hospital for 2 months with CHF, and every step forwards seems to result in some secondary three steps back, plus so concerned about how y 89 year old Grandfather is holding up).
Probably the best thing you can do is focus on what you CAN do. Be supportive of your Aunt and cousin, be there for them and let cousin lean on you. Try to pick specific tasks you need to accomplish, but don't dwell and obsess over them. Eat healthy and be active, of course, but at this point, is calorie counting really going to make or break you? It's not worth it if your mental health is suffering because your blood sugar is too low. I think what I keep doing is asking myself a year from now, what is going to be more important to me: not having the perfect party favor, not losing those extra 15lbs I was determined to lose or not regreting not spending more time with my grandparents?
I don't really unload my feelings/thoughts on this forum, but there is another (non-wedding related) forum I've been a poster on for years. Sometimes just writing it all out there is therapeutic and a stress-reliever in itself. Most of the time I'll start a post, and end up erasing it, but it does help to just let it all out.
Feel better!

michelle11988 · June 2012

Just try and relax and take a deep breath. Make a list of everything you want for the wedding and prioritize that list. Take a day or two to think about your aunt but it sounds like they already have a course of action and it looks promising to me at least. Maybe make a date night with your FI in the next week that you just shut it all off for the night, go to dinner and the movies or something. And don't stress about counting calories, just eat healthy and watch your portions and exercise and you'll feel better.

BrightFirefly · June 2012

I've been stressed too. Work + School + Finals Week + Wedding = not a good combo.

I walk. Something about being outside and smelling the fresh air and moving perks me up.

Or I listen to calming music - like Norah Jones - Come Away with Me

Or I go to youtube and type in "massage videos lita"

and it's this lady with like a wicked soothing voice..

mekiakoo · June 2012

What makes you feel better when you're stressed??

For me, I go for a run, sit outside in the sun, vent about it, or cook.

Honestly, if you think counting calories is pushing it- stop. Just eat healthy and exercise for now. I cannot imagine counting calories, I'd be a wreck.

I agree with the PP with doing WHAT you can do. Don't focus on the things that you cannot control.

I'm sorry you're feeling like this. I hope things get better soon and remember your weddindg will be just for a day. No reason to get extremely stressed over it- if there are small details that are making you stressed, forget it. People aren't going to notice the details if they're not there in the first place.

owengirl996 · June 2012

Thanks, ladies.

The calorie counting is just so I can fit into my dress! lol Technically, everyone tells me it can be altered to fit since it's just the privacy panel on the back of my dress that doesn't close by like, half an inch. So I'm just trying to get a bit of weight off for that. But, who knows if I will even lose it in that one little area. I did go over calories yesterday, and while it felt awful, it felt awesome LOL

I do go for runs when I can. I think yesterday I was feeling even worse because it was soooo rainy and gross all day, and not being able to really get outside didn't help. I went for a run this morning, and I feel pretty good so far.

I'm flying to Indiana next weekend for some final preparations, including my first dress fitting, so I think that's adding to the stress. I'm going to be there for 5 days, and they are having my shower (which I'm excited about!) but otherwise, the other days are pretty packed with appointments and stuff.

Typing it out on here did help a lot. And I know a lot of you can relate to some of these things. I do realize the wedding is just one day, and while it won't be *perfect*, it will be an amazing day. I really am excited to get married, it just sometimes feels like the universe is against making anything about it easy!!

Eliz- I'm sorry you're dealing with all of that with your grandparents

TY for sharing. It's one thing when it's just wedding stress, but when family's health is involved, it's something you can't help, which just makes it even harder to deal with. *hugs*

Firefly- I can't even imagine going through this with school on top of it all!!! I totally wouldn't be able to do it! Work definitely doesn't help in this equation. I'm dealing with people all.day.long and sometimes, I find myself getting extra frustrated with them. Thankfully, I deal with them on the phone, so they can't see my eye rolling

littlemoments324 · June 2012

I feel ya on the stress!!! I gain weight when I'm stressed so I'm freaking out about my dress which isn't helping lol! I know it'll fit, I haven't gained anything *knock on wood*

So sorry for your aunt =( hugs!! stay positive!

dramaqueen91087 · June 2012

I'm sorry about your Aunt.

What I do when I'm stressed, is just take a break. For example, today I am taking a day off (other than knotting!). I'm just sitting on the couch and watching West Wing all day.

ILoveToRobot · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_stress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:0ba4d391-6381-40dd-aaf3-a7149e27fad7Post:4fc85160-ee2b-4db0-8f22-8c60f0604f2e">Stress!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]How are you all dealing with it? Any suggestions? I feel like my emotions are out of control! I think my new "diet" (just counting every single calorie) is not helping and making me extra grouchy lol Plus it's almost that time of the month (although I screwed up my birth control this month, so who really knows, but it HAS to get back on track in the next month!!!) so that's adding to it as well. I have been such a witch lately and broke down crying, and apologized to FI this morning for being so mean lately. Of course he said I wasn't, etc. He has been sick all week, too, which ended up being hard on me as well because he'd wake up coughing, <strong>so I'd end up on the couch...with three cats jumping all over me!</strong> Oh, and on top of everything, my aunt just got diagnosed with cancer on Thursday. Ugh. I'm super close to her too, and her daughter, my cousin, is my pregnant BM. They are doing a hysterectomy in a couple of weeks, so just praying that gets it all. So...help! What are you doing to help the stress??? WR or NWR at this point!
Posted by owengirl996[/QUOTE]

Sorry, you're post isn't funny but the bolded part made me LOL because I am much too familiar with that.

I'm so sorry to hear about your aunt! I'll pray for her to recover fully. One of my aunts was diagnosed with very aggressive cancer recently so I know what you're feeling. I don't know what to tell you about the stress though. The only things I can think of are exercise because it relieves a lot of stress and get an accuprssure mat! They work wonders! Also, with the calorie counting thing maybe you should lay off it for a bit. I'm not saying eat whatever but try just eating healthy and not worry so much about the calories. If you're hungry all the time and feeling irritable that means your body is telling you something. Obviously you need more than what you're giving yoursef.

Eat 6 small meals a day. Protein and good fat are your friends. Stay away from refined foods. The more whole foods you eat the more satisfied you feel. Don't drink diet pop/juice it kind of counteracts the healthy eating you do because the artificial sweetners are much sweeter than real sugar. Also, those frozen diet meals you buy at the store aren't helping much either. Those are packed full of sodium!

BrightFirefly · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_stress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:0ba4d391-6381-40dd-aaf3-a7149e27fad7Post:f252fb0f-340b-458d-bf07-6819ea142c80">Re: Stress!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm sorry about your Aunt. What I do when I'm stressed, is just take a break. For example, today I am taking a day off (other than knotting!). I'm just sitting on the couch and watching West Wing all day.
Posted by dramaqueen91087[/QUOTE]

I love those days. :o)

owengirl996 · June 2012

Thanks, everyone! Totally blew through my calories yesterday by going out with FI...but it was worth it! It's so much easier for me to eat healthier during the week, so I made up for it today.

I also spent 90% of yesterday watching Friends on dvd

All of that definitely helped. Now, I can look forward to going to Indiana this weekend and seeing my family and friends, and my shower! There is a lot I have to do on the other days, but it will be a little easier having my mom, sister, and wedding planner there to hold my hand lol

Thanks again...seriously! I probably wouldn't have gone out to dinner last night and/or felt way more guilty about it than I did if it weren't for reading your posts first.

And thanks for the prayers for my aunt. It's just at a stand still right now, since surgery is the next step but it's not for two weeks. I am glad I get to see her this weekend, though

kmdeck26 · June 2012

I'm so sorry to hear about all that

I will keep you in my prayers!

Stress!!!

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