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Favors

Donation Idea

When my fiancé and I originally started talking about favors, we had read somewhere that people often do donations as favors. I thought that was a pretty cool gesture. Often times, favors are little trinkets people leave on the tables or throw away, if you try to save money in that area. It costs a lot to have "nice and useful" favors, from what I've seen. Anyways, I was wondering what people thought of this idea? Since we are both huge animal lovers and supporters of the SPCA, we thought it would be nice just to have a sign next to our candy bar stating that we donated to the Humane Society. We are having a candy bar, like I said, so people will be taking containers of candy home as well. I don't know if people will consider the candy bar option a favor or just a nice touch, but it won't be like people can't go home with anything at all. We are also doing matches, but that's because we got them dirt cheap, and they're just nice to have. Anyways, I have heard the negative and positive comments towards the favor donation idea, and I wanted to see if people thought it was rude? Maybe some of you think the candy bar is enough, and people won't think it's tacky at all to mention that we donated in lieu of "traditional" favors? I don't know what's right or wrong, so that's why I'm asking now. I'd appreciate your opinions. I'm open to anything, and would never want to do anything seen as tacky or rude. 

Thank you! 
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Re: Donation Idea

  • Simply FatedSimply Fated member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_favors_donation-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:27Discussion:e05941c1-9a9c-4f01-9de2-f007fc2515efPost:4a166cf1-9b96-4574-b07b-0d6d1e4d3b22">Donation Idea</a>:
    [QUOTE]When my fiancé and I originally started talking about favors, we had read somewhere that people often do donations as favors. I thought that was a pretty cool gesture. Often times, favors are little trinkets people leave on the tables or throw away, if you try to save money in that area. It costs a lot to have "nice and useful" favors, from what I've seen. Anyways, I was wondering what people thought of this idea? Since we are both huge animal lovers and supporters of the SPCA, we thought it would be nice just to have a sign next to our candy bar stating that we donated to the Humane Society. We are having a candy bar, like I said, so people will be taking containers of candy home as well. I don't know if people will consider the candy bar option a favor or just a nice touch, but it won't be like people can't go home with anything at all. We are also doing matches, but that's because we got them dirt cheap, and they're just nice to have. Anyways, I have heard the negative and positive comments towards the favor donation idea, and I wanted to see if people thought it was rude? Maybe some of you think the candy bar is enough, and people won't think it's tacky at all to mention that we donated in lieu of "traditional" favors? I don't know what's right or wrong, so that's why I'm asking now. I'd appreciate your opinions. I'm open to anything, and would never want to do anything seen as tacky or rude.  Thank you! 
    Posted by KplusE2012[/QUOTE]
    There might be some people who don't support your charity. These people might be offended that you took the money that would have gone to buy them a favor and donated it to a charity they don't approve of. You might like the charity, but the favors aren't for you, they're for the guests.
    Charities and donations are a personal thing, there is no need to donate and then advertise that you donated instead of getting people wedding favors.

    You can use the candy bar as a "traditional" favor. I'm all for breaking some traditions, but I don't feel that a donation favor is the right direction to go in. Stick with the candy bar, that's my advice.

    FWIW, you can skip favors altogether. In general, most guests would rather receive a belly full of delicious food and memories of a good time (as a favor to take home) than be told, "We were going to give you something else, but we took the money and donated it to our charity, instead!"
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  • Avion22Avion22 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    In principal, I think what you are doing is fine.   A candy bar for your guests to take candy home with them is a type of favor, and I think that's plenty.   If you would like to make a personal donation to the Humane Society, then that's your business, and really doesn't have anything to do with your wedding.   I think it's a really nice, lovely thing to do, and not using it as a party favor shouldn't stop you from making a donation.....but puting up a sign saying you donated is kind of like saying "Look at what awesome people we are!  We donated to charity!"  

    Having said that, I have see people use donations as favors (in fact, I think my sister did it), and I wasn't offended in the least.   Of all the charities you could choose, the Humane Society/SPCA is one that I think few people would have objection to.  

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  • tldhtldh member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_favors_donation-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:27Discussion:e05941c1-9a9c-4f01-9de2-f007fc2515efPost:7e200479-4a3d-4f89-9426-3bc64c1b3100">Re: Donation Idea</a>:
    [QUOTE] Of all the charities you could choose, the Humane Society/SPCA is one that I think few people would have objection to.  
    Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

    Except there are quite a few who believe that if you are going to donate money, it should be to help humans first. 

    Bottom line OP is that donating money to a charity of your choice is a good thing, however, to brag about it is AWish and a favor is a gift to your guest.  In this case, you would be taking a gift for one person and giving it to another.  This is not an honor for your guest.  If you really want donate part of your wedding budget to the SPCA, make your wedding gifts to eachother a donation or cut back on your flowers and take the donation from there.
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  • nlindsay17nlindsay17 member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    The candy bar is more than enough of a favor. Your guests will know that it is meant as a favor because they get to bring a bag of candy home.
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    The candy bar will be an awesome favor, it's an awesome thing to make a donation, but I think it's terribly attention whoreish to put up a sign saying you made the donation.

     
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  • Avion22Avion22 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_favors_donation-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:27Discussion:e05941c1-9a9c-4f01-9de2-f007fc2515efPost:10df019e-81ee-4e16-accf-011b9b41b98a">Re: Donation Idea</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>In Response to Re: Donation Idea : Except there are quite a few who believe that if you are going to donate money, it should be to help humans first.</strong>  Bottom line OP is that donating money to a charity of your choice is a good thing, however, to brag about it is AWish and a favor is a gift to your guest.  In this case, you would be taking a gift for one person and giving it to another.  This is not an honor for your guest.  If you really want donate part of your wedding budget to the SPCA, make your wedding gifts to eachother a donation or cut back on your flowers and take the donation from there.
    Posted by tldh[/QUOTE]

    True, but at least it's not PETA or the ACLU or Pro-Life America.  I would consider those to be far too controversial to be mentioned anywhere near a wedding.  The Red Cross, SPCA, Susan G. Komen Society, and many others I can think of are much more "neutral", and while they may not be everyone's charity of choice, at least they aren't politcal hot-buttons. 
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  • PeavyPeavy member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Read the sticky at the top of the board.

    Personally, I find all donation "favors" -- because they're not really a favor for me -- offensive.  It's fine to skip favors, or to donate that money to your favorite charity, but when you tell me what a good person you are by having donated, I'm offended.
  • tldhtldh member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_favors_donation-idea?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:27Discussion:e05941c1-9a9c-4f01-9de2-f007fc2515efPost:546166e8-8d7c-4b61-8b2b-630c3b9c7c45">Re: Donation Idea</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Donation Idea : True, but at least it's not PETA or the ACLU or Pro-Life America.  I would consider those to be far too controversial to be mentioned anywhere near a wedding.  The <strong>Red Cross, SPCA, Susan G. Komen Society</strong>, and many others I can think of are much more "neutral", and while they may not be everyone's charity of choice, at least they aren't politcal hot-buttons. 
    Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

    Guess again.  Some people have a problem with how The Red Cross responded to some recent disasters.  SPCA we've already talked about.  I am one of the many who hate Susan G. Komen foundation because only pennies out of every dollar goes to research.  The rest goes to administration, advertising and attorneys.  This is why I say donations should be kept a private matter.
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  • rascal17rascal17 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would just stick with the candy bar as your favor. To be honest in my opinion giving money to a charity instead of buying something for me (and other guests) is not really a favor for me no matter what the charity is. 

    If this certain charity is important to you then I'd rather donate money to that charity under your name instead of buying you a gift (instead of vice versa). This is what FI aunt did because they got married after being together for over 20 years and didnt want/need any gifts so they spread the word of no gifts and that if you wanted to give something that they would have a box were you can drop of checks/cash that they would then donate to a charity (I dont remember which one)

    So I would stick to the candy bar as your favor and forgo the donation as a favor. If you would still like to donate to that charity than do so but no need to mention to guests and call it a favor.
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  • Mrs.B6302007Mrs.B6302007 member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    The candy is a sufficient favor.

    You can take the money you and your FI had budgeted for gifts for each other and donate that.

    Don't announce your donation, especially using the  "in the lieu of" wording.  No one likes to be told what they're NOT getting.  Of course, the candy would be their favor so that's not really an issue. I only mention it because it was brought up in the OP.
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  • edited December 2011
    Go with the candy and don't do a donation as a favor.
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  • mcskatcatmcskatcat member
    500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I ditto Mrs. B. - I think donations are much more meaningful when YOU are giving something up.  It doesn't even have to be wedding-related, just if you're such an animal-lover, then it makes sense to me that you might give up a new pair of shoes rather than something that you won't even be missing. 

    And my SIL did do this for her wedding, at her dad's discretion, and it did seem horribly AW-ish. 
  • graysquirrelgraysquirrel member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Weddings are not the time or place to be making any kind of statement other than the one you make between you and your H at the altar. People do not like going to parties (which is what your reception is) and having anything political, controversial, or money-related being thrown at them. They just want to show up, support your marriage, and have a great time. If I saw a sign advertising or box accepting donations at a wedding I'd be horribly offended. 
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