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Second Weddings

Reasons I love this board...

Yup!  It's time for me to write one of these posts again. 

I have spent too much time on the Etiquette board recently and honestly, I wonder why the board even has that name sometimes.  There are a couple of bullies there who really need a tutorial on appropriate communications.  But I digress.

I love this board because:

Mortgages.  You know the background.  There is no need to explain the stress of two (or more) mortgages here.  We all get it.

Middle Age.  Most of us live the true meaning of middle age on a daily basis -- squeezed between adolescent children and not-so-gracefully aging parents.  Or aging parents that act like adolescents.  Or something like that.  LOL!

Careers.  Some of us are in careers we've enjoyed for decades.  Others have lost careers (some more than once) but we keep at the job hunt, ignoring those who taunt us with the phrase, "You're overqualified." 

Retirement.  Many of us are closer to retirement than any other work stage.  And some of us have received the dreaded letter from AARP, urging us to join.  *sigh*  Stupid, stupid AARP ... go away!

Confidence.  No matter what life throws at us, our experience is the foundation for very well-earned confidence.

Courage.  We have the courage to keep our heads up on the worst days imaginable.  We have survived unfathomable loss ... siblings, children, parents, spouses, friends ... yet we keep moving.  We keep moving.  We just get it done.  Every day.

Faith.  We have faith in our friends, our spouses, our fiancés, our children, ourselves and in life.

Yeah ... I really love this board.  You ladies rock!

Re: Reasons I love this board...

  • mybooboosmybooboos member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I whole-heartedly agree!

    Nicely stated...

    P.S. I don't visit the etiquette board often, so I may need to pop over there for the entertainment value.Laughing
    Presentation is everything!! Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    Awww Lisa, your post brought tears to my eyes. ITA on the feelings on this board, because I just love seeing everyone support each other, rather than tear them down. I don't go to other boards where "snarky" reigns, because I really don't have enough time in my busy day to bring myself down.........hell, I'm already on anti-depressants to overcome that crap in my REAL life Laughing

    To be honest, I love sharing my wisdom with the gals on my local and month boards, because yes, in most cases I AM old enough to be their mom. But when I come here, it's like having a sit down with friends my own age, who have experienced so much in life they can TOTALLY relate to my own issues, LOL. Not to mention the issues with my kids.

    I went to an all girls Catholic High School (a lot of good THAT did me, the trashy unmarried  mom of 2 kids LMAO), and graduated in the 1970's. Our class song was "I am Woman" by Helen Reddy, and honestly, that send-off from HS set me on a path with confidence that I've never waivered from. And I sense from all of you, that it's the same for you.

    YAY US !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • AbbeyS2011AbbeyS2011 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for such an encouraging post. 

    Let us hope when some of the snarkies from other boards make their way to here, that they will have matured and will be able to impart wisdom to others.

    I have to say - I regularly lurk at, and post on Etiquette - I have the harpoon scars to prove it too! 

    I have to correct you however, on one point - on your faith list, you forgot about faith in the ability to love again, and love itself.  Tis a wonderful thing.....
    Anniversary
  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Lisa - what a lovely and thoughtful post!!  I agree with you 100%.  I lurk on other boards from time to time but rarely state much just because I really don't like teeth marks.

    The ladies on this boart are wonderful!! 
  • Marrin713Marrin713 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I like all the boards but I relate best to this one <duh!>  We DO rock! Cool
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_reasons-love-this-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:82e68656-e411-4d1a-9406-0358cab1de66Post:063b9b87-d49b-4adc-bbc6-d01daad7eab2">Reasons I love this board...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Yup!  It's time for me to write one of these posts again.  I have spent too much time on the Etiquette board recently and honestly, I wonder why the board even has that name sometimes.  There are a couple of bullies there who really need a tutorial on appropriate communications.  But I digress. I love this board because: Mortgages.   You know the background.  There is no need to explain the stress of two (or more) mortgages here.  We all get it. Middle Age.   Most of us live the true meaning of middle age on a daily basis -- squeezed between adolescent children and not-so-gracefully aging parents.  Or aging parents that act like adolescents.  Or something like that.  LOL! Careers.   Some of us are in careers we've enjoyed for decades.  Others have lost careers (some more than once) but we keep at the job hunt, ignoring those who taunt us with the phrase, "You're overqualified."  Retirement.   Many of us are closer to retirement than any other work stage.  "And some of us have received the dreaded letter from AARP, urging us to join.  *sigh*  Stupid, stupid AARP ... go away!" Confidence.   No matter what life throws at us, our experience is the foundation for very well-earned confidence. Courage.   We have the courage to keep our heads up on the worst days imaginable.  We have survived unfathomable loss ... siblings, children, parents, spouses, friends ... yet we keep moving.  We keep moving.  We just get it done.  Every day. Faith.  We have faith in our friends, our spouses, our fiancés, our children, ourselves and in life. Yeah ... I really love this board.  You ladies rock!
    Posted by Lisa50[/QUOTE]
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_reasons-love-this-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:82e68656-e411-4d1a-9406-0358cab1de66Post:063b9b87-d49b-4adc-bbc6-d01daad7eab2">Reasons I love this board...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Yup!  It's time for me to write one of these posts again.  I have spent too much time on the Etiquette board recently and honestly, I wonder why the board even has that name sometimes.  There are a couple of bullies there who really need a tutorial on appropriate communications.  But I digress. I love this board because: Mortgages.   You know the background.  There is no need to explain the stress of two (or more) mortgages here.  We all get it. Middle Age.   Most of us live the true meaning of middle age on a daily basis -- squeezed between adolescent children and not-so-gracefully aging parents.  Or aging parents that act like adolescents.  Or something like that.  LOL! Careers.   Some of us are in careers we've enjoyed for decades.  Others have lost careers (some more than once) but we keep at the job hunt, ignoring those who taunt us with the phrase, "You're overqualified."  Retirement.   Many of us are closer to retirement than any other work stage. " And some of us have received the dreaded letter from AARP, urging us to join.  *sigh*  Stupid, stupid AARP ... go away!" Confidence.   No matter what life throws at us, our experience is the foundation for very well-earned confidence. Courage.   We have the courage to keep our heads up on the worst days imaginable.  We have survived unfathomable loss ... siblings, children, parents, spouses, friends ... yet we keep moving.  We keep moving.  We just get it done.  Every day. Faith.  We have faith in our friends, our spouses, our fiancés, our children, ourselves and in life. Yeah ... I really love this board.  You ladies rock!
    Posted by Lisa50[/QUOTE]

    And my "invitation" came on my 50th birthday.  As if I wasn't depressed enough.
  • edited December 2011
    Lisa:

    Either the board is misbehaving or I'm having a day, but I was responding to your comment about AARP.  My invitation arrived on my 50th birthay.  I really didn't want anyone to know I was actually 50 and definitely not strangers.  I still haven't joined even though it's a really good organization.
  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Alexmom2 - Uh they started bothering me when I was 40!! That was because I was married at the time to someone 17 1/2 yrs my senior so I got lumped in with him.... Frown
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_reasons-love-this-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:82e68656-e411-4d1a-9406-0358cab1de66Post:bddae69a-22cd-44fb-89b4-698a3a08346a">Re: Reasons I love this board...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thanks for such an encouraging post.  Let us hope when some of the snarkies from other boards make their way to here, that they will have matured and will be able to impart wisdom to others. I have to say - I regularly lurk at, and post on Etiquette - I have the harpoon scars to prove it too!  <strong>I have to correct you however, on one point - on your faith list, you forgot about faith in the ability to love again, and love itself.  Tis a wonderful thing.....
    </strong>Posted by AbbeyS2011[/QUOTE]

    Yes, yes ... you are so right.  We are good women, strong women and crazy in love!!  It is a beautiful thing.  Thanks!
  • edited December 2011
    Thanks, I am not alone... I just got my butt chewed out by some nasties on another board.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_reasons-love-this-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:82e68656-e411-4d1a-9406-0358cab1de66Post:035fed43-2926-4656-9745-25203d592908">Re: Reasons I love this board...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thanks, I am not alone... I just got my butt chewed out by some nasties on another board.
    Posted by downtownbebebrown[/QUOTE]

    Alas, you are not alone!  Smile.  It's Friday!  <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />
  • Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    I forgot to add to my post, don't downplay AARP. I've secured some GREAT bargains with their hotel rates, LOL. I'm over 50 and proud (but then, I am also a coupon clipper and bargain/resale shopper)
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_reasons-love-this-board?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:35Discussion:82e68656-e411-4d1a-9406-0358cab1de66Post:d6004200-4434-41a7-a97c-27223a520f96">Re: Reasons I love this board...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I forgot to add to my post, don't downplay AARP. I've secured some GREAT bargains with their hotel rates, LOL. I'm over 50 and proud (but then, I am also a coupon clipper and bargain/resale shopper)
    Posted by Sue-n-Kevin[/QUOTE]

    Yeah, I know ... I just wish they'd stop sending so_much_mail.  It probably doesn't help that their HQ is just around the corner from a block of restaurants and a movie theater FI and I like to frequent.  I'm trying to ease into 50.  Why must they keep knocking me over the head with it?  I'm coming along ... just in my own time.  LOL!
  • edited December 2011
    Vero Lisa, verissimo and very well said...that's why we are not crazy about making the little tissue for the tears of joy...we have mortgages to pay, teenagers to guide and keep up with, ex's that can bother us from both sides, and an amazing guy that love us with all the imperfections that time reveals as it goes by...we have a very real thing!
  • fireytigerfireytiger member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I admit that while i'm on my second marriage, and I can't relate to EVERYTHING everyone posts on here (I'm not getting anything from the AARP, but FI is because he's considered disabled due to his heart condition, and on medicare lol). But I still love it here anyway, for several of the reasons you listed Lisa.

    One of the biggest reasons I enjoy it here so much is a level of maturity that I don't see elsewhere at TK. And no, I don't mean maturity as far as age, lol. I'm talking as far as life experience and personality. I enjoy the other forums, but it gets difficult sometimes for me, because I can't relate to a lot of those other women. Many of them are my age (especially on my month board) but so many of them are really immature, and they don't know what it's like to REALLY handle hardship in their lives or relationships. It's not their fault, they just haven't been there. The worst thing some of them have had to deal with is arguing with their parents over how many thousands of dollars they're getting for the wedding. I read that and I think, my parents haven't even given me 500 dollars total for both of my weddings combined lol. So it's hard to relate with "problems" like that.

    Here, most of us are already secure in our lives, we have careers, or children, or at least know what we want out of life. I'm honestly having some trouble explaining what I mean, but I feel like when I make a post here about something, people here actually can relate to what i'm talking about. It's not just empty words, replies saying "oh, sorry things suck for you". It's a feeling of UNDERSTANDING where i'm coming from and how i'm feeling. It's a good feeling to be able to relate to others who have done the same thing(s) you have at some point, so you all can say "Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt" together. :)

    I honestly appreciate this board a great deal. I appreciate all you ladies who have helped me out when I've been at my wit's end, and I appreciate knowing that I have a safe haven where I'm not automatically looked down upon for having a second marriage. :)
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