2 questions- birth control, and ceremony

Re: 2 questions- birth control, and ceremony

• Riss91 member

  

  January 2012

  The Church does allow the use of BCP when it is medically necessary. But there are very rare cases where BCP are the only option. I think it would be important for you to find out what is causing the pain because the pills usually do NOT fix the problem, they may be simply covering up the symptoms. I know there are ladies that have been on the pill for similar reasons,  bc the medical community often just prescribes the pill as it's the easiest "solution". These ladies have later figured out that NFP methods actually diagnosed the problem, and simply taking certain supplements could actually solve the problem, rather than mask it. This has also solved fertility issues for some ladies. It's kinda like taking advil bc you broke your leg. Advil is only covering up the pain, you likely need to treat the leg with a cast, etc so that you can heal properly. So, it is something to consider. Sorry that was a novel!
  
  As far as a ceremony outside of mass, usually you forego the mass if one of the couple is NOT Catholic and therfore would not receive communion. It is thought that the ceremony should be unifying, and having communion where one person cannot receive is not unifying. We have an outline of both a ceremony within mass and outside of mass on our website -- />click HERE
  
  Hopefully I've answered your questions! Happy New Year!

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• bibliophile2010 member

  

  January 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_2-questions-birth-control-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:3e6e7c31-4958-4760-808e-8a6b1c2584f4Post:b3f30a04-8be0-4c86-a471-90643971ef1f">2 questions- birth control, and ceremony</a>:
  [QUOTE]Hi everyone! We haven't had our pre-cana classes yet. I have been on birth control since I was a teen, for very painful menstrual conditions (not sexually active). Will that be seen as okay going into the marriage? We want children, but will probably have to adopt. My other question is-- has anyone here not had a full mass for their wedding ceremony? I am wondering what parts of the church's teaching are still included in the ceremony when a full mass is not performed vs when it is. Thank you!
  Posted by batfacepattermonth[/QUOTE]
  
  Riss outlined an excellent answer to your first question.
  
  I am, however, confused about your second question. There is no part of Church <strong><em>teaching</em></strong> that is left out of the ceremony outside of Mass. The Liturgy of the Eucharist is omitted, so the Eucharistic prayer, etc. are not included, simply because there is no communion/mass. The teachings, though, remain the same, and the ceremony still contains the Liturgy of the Word and the Rite of Marriage. The marriage, the teachings contained in the mass, and the vows are otherwise exactly the same.
  
  The ceremony outside of mass is not a way to escape Catholic teachings -- it is an alternative for those couples who, for appropriate reasons, do not want to include communion in their service. I'm sorry if that was not the spirit of your question (and you really did just want to know what is part of the liturgy), but I just wanted to make sure that it was clear.

  

  Report0 Reply
• batfacepattermonth

  

  January 2012

  Thanks to both of you for your answers! We've been engaged for almost a year already but our church won't have classes for us until spring, so these questions have been lingering.

  
  

  Regarding my first question- my medical issues have been fully addressed and I work closely with a specialist. Without going into detail, BCP manage more-than-debilitating side effects. My other alternative is invasive surgery. I don't have the luxury of using NFP as a diagnostic tool and we wouldn't otherwise be trying to prevent children once married anyway if it weren't for my health. Hopefully my priest will be understanding of this.

  
  

  And my second question, I more or less just want to know what to prepare my non-Catholic guests for and what our options are and how different either option is. I am hoping for the ceremony to feel as inclusive as possible for my guests but wanted to know what I'd be sacrificing without a full Mass. That website was helpful, thank you! Thank you both!

  Report0 Reply
• Riss91 member

  

  January 2012

  You're welcome! I am sorry to hear about your condition. I know there are some  conditions, like endometriosis that are really difficult to manuever without BCP. I would definitely still speak with an NFP doctor or NFP specialist about your issue, just to be certain there aren't other options. I know it's hard to believe, but many OB/GYNs and specialists really don't understand NFP, and many have a really warped understanding, so they may not know of the options that are available under NFP. You can find someone here: http://onemoresoul.com/
  I think that would completely close the loop and you can feel confident that you've done all you could to avoid use of artificial BCPs.
  
  I wouldn't worry too much about your guests feeling uncomfortable. These days, we all attend weddings that are different from what we are used to. I am sure your guests will just be happy to see you get married!
  
  Good luck and definitely stick around!

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• ElisabethJoanne member

  

  January 2012

  If onemoresoul does not have someone in your area (It doesn't in mine.), or who accepts your insurance, there is an American College of Pro-life OB-GYNs, whose members are likely to be knowledgeable re: NFP. Also, crisis pregnancy centers usually know who the pro-life and Catholic or Catholic-friendly OB-GYNs in the area are.

  Report0 Reply
• batfacepattermonth

  

  January 2012

  Thank you both! I will do some research...

  Report0 Reply