Help! Opinions needed.

Re: Help! Opinions needed.

• Summer2011Bride member

  

  August 2012

  Do you have a budget? If you are OK with paying for most anything (within reason), I might go with her to try dresses on and when she finds "the one," let her know at that time that you would love to buy her her dress.
  
  That way if the dress she falls in love with is beyond what you were planning to pay, you could either no longer pay for it (but don't say anything about buying it beforehand), or offer to pay for part of it.

  
  
  
  
  

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• StephBeanWed61502 member

  

  August 2012

  I would probably let her know about your generous gift before she goes shopping, and if you DO have an upper limit on your budget, I would phrase it as "I'm so happy for you and I love you and I really want to give you X amount towards the purchase of your wedding dress."  That way, she can decide whether to only look at dresses within that amount, or if she wants to go over that amount and pay the difference herself.  Also, if she was only planning on spending a significantly smaller amount on the dress when she thought she was paying for it herself, it could open up more dress options for her to try on.

  
  

  My mom paid for my dress as a gift, and knowing her budget beforehand helped me when shopping (my personal budget for the dress was about half what my mom offered to pay, so it totally changed the "level" of dress I was able to comfortably shop for).

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• TheVirginians member

  

  August 2012

  You are so generous! I recommend waiting until she has found the dress. If it is too much for you, offer to pay for the deposit or half the dress.  If she cannot find a dress in her budget, then you can offer to pay towards her dress so she can increase her price range.

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• stantokm member

  

  August 2012

  Yesterday my aunt/godmother very generously offered to pay for my wedding dress as a special gift.  She purposefully waited until after I already chose my dress to make the offer because she didn't want me to second-guess my decision or go with something less expensive because she was paying for it--which I might have done if I'd wound up choosing something that cost more than what I got.  I'm so glad that she did it this way.

  

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• kellyjohnson527 member

  

  August 2012

  how beautiful! that is so sweet of you.  If you have a budget, give her a check in a card, and if you don't, let her know after she picks the dress.  Either way, I'm sure she'll be so touched.

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• jspurcell member

  

  August 2012

  I would talk to her about her budget and consider yours as well so you know around what you'll be spending ahead of time. If it is more than you expected to pay or can afford, I recommend what the previous people said and either give her a check with that amount or offer to pay however much you can afford. (In this situation, I personally would just offer to pay however much you can afford because you won't know the exact price of the dress ahead of time.)
  However, if your budgets are similar or money is not an issue for the dress, I would simply wait until she has picked the dress. I would still see around what range she was considering so she'll have more options if she can't find anything within "her budget."
  That is very kind of you. My FI and I are paying for our wedding ourselves too so that is a blessing.

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