MiL wants to wear a black dress.....

kiarrai77 · August 2010

My mother in law went out and got a black dress for my wedding. I would rather she wear anything else. Is there a good way to tell her to selest a new, more appropriate color.

pete2835 · August 2010

Maybe she feels it is slimming? Black is becoming much more appropriate for weddings these days. Rather than telling her to buy something different maybe you can help her jazz it up with accessories?

hildeedee · August 2010

Hmm...not sure. I think black is actually really classy at weddings and is actually quite popular to wear as a guest or if you're in a wedding (the last two times I was a bridesmaid we wore black). My mom is wearing black for mine. What is it that you find inappropriate about it? Could you get her a colorful jacket or sweater to wear with it?

sheaday · August 2010

My mom plans on wearing black, it's slimming and classy. I've worn a black dress to a wedding before, didn't feel weird or inappropriate.

JudieN · August 2010

Generally I don't think black is inappropriate for weddings - I was encouraging my mom to wear black because it is slimming. Unless your wedding is a summer wedding outdoors in the sunshine, I don't think anyone will think twice about her wearing black. (And even outdoors in the sunshine there could be occassion to find a cute black dress that would work). I agree with PP - see if you can help her jazz it up with accessories or find a colorful jacket or something.

SarahPLiz · August 2010

I don't think there is anything wrong with black. If she feels pretty in the dress and it fits her reasonably well, then I'd say leave it alone. If she is more comfortable in black, please don't make her wear something that makes her uncomfortable or self-conscious. That would be terribly selfish and would not get you off on the right foot with her.

mohutch37 · August 2010

Kiarrai,

I also would feel a bit awkward if my FMIL chose black, since it could come off as mourning the loss of her child. I hear your concern and believe me, I am bossy enough that I would want to protest if I was in your situation! I do have to agree with other posted replies though. Hopefully she would be open to accessorizing it with a jacket or something, so the black is not given too much attention. I hope this works for you!

BabyBlueNTexas · August 2010

Many bridesmaids are going with black... so I can see why she might want to choose it. Maybe offer to go shopping and pick dresses of color? Maybe she will change her mind if you help find a better dress.

twinksicle · August 2010

I agree with mohutch, that since she's the MIL, it could seem like she's "mourning" if she's dressed completely in black. Maybe you can politely suggest a silver jacket? Or brighten it up with some "happier" looking accessories?

FromPenceToPrice · August 2010

My MIL wore a black dress and looked absolutely stunning. I didn't think twice about the color, and I don't think that most people do either. Unless you think she did it to spite you, I'd leave it alone.

jedaniel · August 2010

My bridemaids are wearing black floor length dresses. At weddings I have been to multiple people wear black. I think it is very classy and there are tons of ways to dress it up brighter. (Gold Jewlery, Bright Jacket, Silver Heels)

kiarrai77 · August 2010

Few more details. The wedding colors are Navy blue and Apple green. we are going for bright earthy colors and my MiL had told me she would wear a brown dress. Which would match the earthy "green" wedding theme.

I found out that she has not even been looking for a dress and just picked the first one she saw. This tells me she does not care about her son's wedding. My mom just found a great bright blue and I don't want my soon to be MiL to stickout in the photos and look like she is mourning.

Now if you are having a wedding where black is a planned color that is great, but I was going for bright and chearful. My best friend had a beautiful wedding where all of the bridesmaids picked out their own dress in black and it matched her evening theme.

She has beautiful auborn hair and bright brown eyes I was hoping that she would welcome the chance to wear something that would complement her and not cause her to become part of the shadows.

Thanks to all who commented, I read all the suggestions and I plan on saying no more to her. But I will smile and make sure her flowers are all the more bright.

MiL wants to wear a black dress.....

Re: MiL wants to wear a black dress.....

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