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Wedding Party

Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportat

I love my Godmother very much but she's making my life hell right now.  Before you judge.. I spent 2 years of my life unable to walk due to breaking my back and shattering my knee making a rescue at work. I know what its like to not be able to legitimately get around.  

We live in New Jersey.  My wedding is just outside of Chicago.  my future in-laws offered to pay for everything including airfare and hotels for my family and closest friends from 3 countries if we got married in their state.  I will be moving there before the wedding.

  I am having a private ceremony when he gets home from being deployed with the Army.  We will have a small informal wedding and going away party in NJ another day ---but the big religious wedding will be in their home town at the end of the summer..  

Due to her size (size 32/ 500+ pounds - putting her on a plane to Chicago is not a possibility.  The seats are not wide enough.  

At home and doing something she wants to do or where someone else is not the center of attention - she walks with canes or a walker with a seat.  She gets around well when she wants to.  

If she's not the center of attention at events - she rents a wheel chair and has everyone pushing her around and complains the whole time and makes it seem like she's chair bound for life.  Because my wonderful mother in law is paying for the big wedding- I'm letting her call the shots. (her checkbook - her wedding) . godmother is giving me a hard time about everything.  



private plane is out.. she wont fit.. we measured my parents friend's plane. 

Private car service - i have a hard time getting out of a limo..  i don't see her doing it . maybe a town car but 2 days in a town car.. ehhhh  there's rules how long they can drive straight.

Traditional ambulance - cot's not that comfy for 800 mile drive and you're sitting on the axel the whole way so she'll never let the poor EMT's hear the end of it..

Wheelchair van - a possibility  but again the commercial drivers license rules go into effect.  


I was thinking Amtrak but never traveled by train long distance before.  Don't know if the seats are wide enough. She will also have the walker - the canes - luggage - and the raised toilet seat she doesn't need home.. I will be paying one of her granddaughters to travel with her.

Has anyone traveled on amtrak with a chair?  Was it doable?

Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportat

  • bunni727bunni727 member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 250 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:0c1654da-6f63-4e63-a5fd-69232df3ebdb">Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I love my Godmother very much but she's making my life hell right now.  Before you judge.. I spent 2 years of my life unable to walk due to breaking my back and shattering my knee making a rescue at work. I know what its like to not be able to legitimately get around.   We live in New Jersey.  My wedding is just outside of Chicago.  my future in-laws offered to pay for everything including airfare and hotels for my family and closest friends from 3 countries if we got married in their state.  I will be moving there before the wedding.  <strong> I am having a private ceremony when he gets home from being deployed with the Army.  We will have a small informal wedding and going away party in NJ another day ---but the big religious wedding will be in their home town at the end of the summer.. </strong>  Due to her size (size 32/ 500+ pounds - putting her on a plane to Chicago is not a possibility.  The seats are not wide enough.   At home and doing something she wants to do or where someone else is not the center of attention - she walks with canes or a walker with a seat.  She gets around well when she wants to.   If she's not the center of attention at events - she rents a wheel chair and has everyone pushing her around and complains the whole time and makes it seem like she's chair bound for life.  Because my wonderful mother in law is paying for the big wedding- I'm letting her call the shots. (her checkbook - her wedding) . godmother is giving me a hard time about everything.   private plane is out.. she wont fit.. we measured my parents friend's plane.  Private car service - i have a hard time getting out of a limo..  i don't see her doing it . maybe a town car but 2 days in a town car.. ehhhh  there's rules how long they can drive straight. Traditional ambulance - cot's not that comfy for 800 mile drive and you're sitting on the axel the whole way so she'll never let the poor EMT's hear the end of it.. Wheelchair van - a possibility  but again the commercial drivers license rules go into effect.   I was thinking Amtrak but never traveled by train long distance before.  Don't know if the seats are wide enough. She will also have the walker - the canes - luggage - and the raised toilet seat she doesn't need home.. I will be paying one of her granddaughters to travel with her. Has anyone traveled on amtrak with a chair?  Was it doable?
    Posted by firerescue325[/QUOTE]

    I'm not sure why you are in charge of her travelling arrangements. I would think she would be a better judge of what kind of travel would work for her, and should be handling that herself.


    As for the bolded: Are you having three weddings?
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  • I remember the Amtrak seats being a similar size to airplane seats so I doubt that will work. Also ditto previous posters why are you trying to have 3 weddings and I think your Godmother should arrange her own transportation.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:93118495-9978-49ea-8168-24a07b74a71c">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]You're having 3 weddings and you're afraid we will judge you for your comments about your god mother???
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    But but but... her fiance is in the military and their families are soooo far away! Doesn't that mean it's ok?

    Right?
  • Regardless of how your godmother gets there, no one will be paying attention to her if you are having three weddings. They'll be busy talking about how ridiculous that is.

    But why can't she just attend of of the weddings in her area? Why does she have to attend the fake re-do?
  • Technically yes 3 weddings..  She's invited to 2 out of 3   No one is invited to the civil ceremony because we are getting married short notice as soon as he comes home  


    we are  paying for all her travel expenses including one of the step grand-daughters going with her as a companion. 

    I normally  take care of her financial dealings 
     If I left it up to her.. she has a terrible habit of not following through with things or forgetting if she took care of things or not.  She never took care of anything while her husband was alive and is having a terrible time of it since he passed.  


  • Why are you wanting to have three weddings?
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  • She could arrive on a magic carpet and no one will even notice because your second two weddings will be so ridiculous that no one will be talking about anything except that. 
  • I live and breathe Amtrak. Maybe you'd learn all you needed to know by, I don't know, checking Amtrak's page? http://www.amtrak.com/accessible-travel-services

    Three weddings is dumb as hell and you should be ashamed of yourself for even considering this derpitude.

  • Shoot, if I had enough money for three weddings, I'd just dump all of it into one big fat overkill shindig that people would talk about for ages.

    Or you know... build an orphanage or something.  Whatever.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    Anniversary

  • NYCMercedesNYCMercedes member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:9a89f2e6-7df5-43e8-87dc-55e84b01bd2b">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Technically yes 3 weddings..  She's invited to 2 out of 3   No one is invited to the civil ceremony because we are getting married short notice as soon as he comes home   we are  paying for all her travel expenses including one of the step grand-daughters going with her as a companion.  I normally  take care of her financial dealings    If I left it up to her.. she has a terrible habit of not following through with things or forgetting if she took care of things or not.  She never took care of anything while her husband was alive and is having a terrible time of it since he passed.  
    Posted by firerescue325[/QUOTE]

    Please just stop the nonsense. Have your wedding. Then have a going away party near her. Then have a big party in Chicago without her, as she clearly cannot travel. Your one wedding is when you get married. There is no possible way you could have another wedding once you are married. Get it?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:89814eef-daec-4e0d-b9f1-dc4d3ec57b7c">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I live and breathe Amtrak. Maybe you'd learn all you needed to know by, I don't know, checking Amtrak's page? <a href="http://www.amtrak.com/accessible-travel-services" rel="nofollow">http://www.amtrak.com/accessible-travel-services</a> Three weddings is dumb as hell and you should be ashamed of yourself for even considering this derpitude.
    Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

    <div>LMAO at "derpitude". I swear to god I learn the best vocabulary words on The Knot.</div>
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  • 1) She is responsible for her own transportation.  If she chooses not to arrange appropriate transportation or is unable to travel, she will miss the wedding.

    2) There is no reason to have three weddings.  In fact, it is impossible. You can only get married once. The idea of three separate events is simply proposterous.  

    3) I'm also thinking this might be MUD.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:981329f3-2e51-4f55-8ec8-b051152b1596">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Shoot, if I had enough money for three weddings, I'd just dump all of it into one big fat overkill shindig that people would talk about for ages. Or you know... build an orphanage or something.  Whatever.
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

    <div>Totally lol-ing right now. </div>
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Anniversary 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:981329f3-2e51-4f55-8ec8-b051152b1596">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Shoot, if I had enough money for three weddings, I'd just dump all of it into one big fat overkill shindig that people would talk about for ages. Or you know... build an orphanage or something.  Whatever.
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]
     This is what I was thinking too. Why 3 weddings? Dear lord I don't think I would be able to stand the planning. OP - in case you are real, the train's seats are quite large. She may need to get 2 seats (I'm not sure) but they are much bigger than a plane seat. Or at least the Amtrak train I've taken is....
  • thank you for those who answered the question.  

    For those of you who are hating because we're having 2 receptions - there's nothing wrong with what we're doing and it's done all the time in different cultures. We can afford it.  
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:1548e302-a51e-4c05-9004-8d7fdca05e34">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]thank you for those who answered the question.   For those of you who are hating because we're having 2 receptions - there's nothing wrong with what we're doing and it's done all the time in different cultures. We can afford it.  
    Posted by firerescue325[/QUOTE]
    We're hating on the 3 weddings.  Having multiple parties is fine, though unless they're on your actual wedding day they're not receptions.



  • It's not an issue of whether or not you can afford them. It's ridiculous to have 3 wedding ceremonies. You can only marry the same man once, so your wedding = your private civil ceremony. The others are like putting on a play; they are "re-dos" and are not truly showing you two getting married. If you want the big to-do, then you should skip the civil ceremony and have one large wedding like you want.


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  • But GUYS! She didn't ask if she SHOULD have three weddings. She ONLY asked about transporting her godmother to ALL of her WEDDINGS. GAWD! She DOESN'T NEED your PERSONAL OPINIONS! If you have NEGATIVE COMMENTS, she doesn't NEED them HERE!


    :)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:d21026f5-5dcf-420d-a2b2-fcb282f2774a">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]But GUYS! She didn't ask if she SHOULD have three weddings. She ONLY asked about transporting her godmother to ALL of her WEDDINGS. GAWD! She DOESN'T NEED your PERSONAL OPINIONS! If you have NEGATIVE COMMENTS, she doesn't NEED them HERE! :)
    Posted by beardownbchs[/QUOTE]

    Oh man, it was the word 'orphanage' that was offensive wasn't it?  Geeze I'm sorry, I just have a sailor's mouth sometimes...
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    Anniversary

  • Firerescue, I commend your loyalty to your godmother. If more familial relations were stronger, there'd be less reason for people to boast five digit post counts on a wedding web forum years after their own nuptials. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:70985db3-5579-476d-81d7-13824ec45db6">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Firerescue, I commend your loyalty to your godmother. If more familial relations were stronger, there'd be less reason for people to boast five digit post counts on a wedding web forum years after their own nuptials. 
    Posted by rodigsorange[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>WTH is this supposed to mean? That people here don't like their families because they're here? That these women don't belong here since "they're not brides"? Could you possibly be any more of a judgmental prick? </div><div>
    </div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:91e775a2-b094-4e15-ab8f-750a78ba5901">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation. : WTH is this supposed to mean? That people here don't like their families because they're here? That these women don't belong here since "they're not brides"? Could you possibly be any more of a judgmental prick? 
    Posted by beardownbchs[/QUOTE]

    Are you serious.  Very few of the responses have anything to do with her question.  So yes its passing judgment on the OP post.  Regardless what any of you asshats think its her life and her family not yours. She asked about her godmother and traveling.  She didn't ask for anyone approval or judgments on her wedding choices.

    Judgemental  All of  you beyotches should go back and reread the junk you write over and over again.  Your may think your helping people but your not.  Do you really think that she is just going to drop what she has planned because the beyotch on the knot doesn't approve seriously.  So yes go spend time with your family and stop worrying about what others are doing so. If they ask for your opinion then give it.

    Good gawd I am so glad my life doesn't revolve around what other brides are doing and feeling the need to cram my beliefs down their throats.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_need-logistics-help-from-someone-whos-traveled-wdodo-someone-in-a-wheelchair-on-public-transportation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d8305cf9-837b-438e-8596-46bbd5591a25Post:336dbd5e-028f-424a-9d08-a97b3a8929e1">Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need Logistics help from someone who's traveled w/dodo someone in a wheelchair on public transportation. : Are you serious.  Very few of the responses have anything to do with her question.  So yes its passing judgment on the OP post.  Regardless what any of you asshats think its her life and her family not yours. She asked about her godmother and traveling.  She didn't ask for anyone approval or judgments on her wedding choices. Judgemental  All of  you beyotches should go back and reread the junk you write over and over again.  Your may think your helping people but your not.  Do you really think that she is just going to drop what she has planned because the beyotch on the knot doesn't approve seriously.  So yes go spend time with your family and stop worrying about what others are doing so. If they ask for your opinion then give it. Good gawd I am so glad my life doesn't revolve around what other brides are doing and feeling the need to cram my beliefs down their throats.
    Posted by melissanjoe21[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Heehee, you're adorable!  *pinches cheeks*  Who's the angrwy wittle poster? Yes you are!  Boojebojebooghe.  I just wanna eat you all up ^_^ 

    </div>
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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