For the last couple months, our lives have been turned upside down.
It all started back in March, FMIL came with us to book the rehearsal dinner location and left FFIL at home. She said he wasn't feeling well, and the doctor thought he had IBS (which he had once before). She said he had bad diarrhea and couldn't leave the house long enough to come with us. But she also downplayed it quite a bit, we learned to find out. They live about an hour away from us, so we typically didn't see them that often, but also didn't think much of it. When FI talked to his mom a few weeks later, we learned his dad still wasn't feeling well, and the medication the doctor had prescribed, wasn't helping. Weeks went by, and the doctor wanted him to go in for a colonoscopy, but he couldn't leave the house long enough without having to go to the bathroom. We eventually learned that he was barely eating anymore, had become VERY dehydrated and weak and was lying in bed all day. By this point, this had been going on for almost 2 months!! FI finally convinced his mom to bring his dad to the hospital.
When he was admitted to the hospital, the nurses said they had never seen someone that dehydrated before. They did some tests and saw that his appendix was enlarged, so they did emergency surgery and removed his appendix. After that surgery, he seemed a little better, but they still hadn't determined what was wrong with him. It took awhile for him to recover from that surgery, before he was strong enough for them to do a colonoscopy on him. At that point, they diagnosed him with ulcerative Colitis. That can be treated with antibiotics and steroids, so they put him on them, and eventually got him up on his feet again. He was barely walking though, because he had been bed ridden for so long, so they sent him to a physical therapy type place for 10 days.
They got him walking again, and sent him home, but he still wasn't eating right, and he was still going to the bathroom a lot. It seemed that the medication wasn't really working. Then one night, he woke up FMIL screaming in pain, and collapsed on the floor. She rushed him to the emergency room that night, and he was admitted to the hospital again. They performed emergency surgery on him the next morning to find out was wrong.
They ended up finding 3 holes in his colon. They weren't able to repair it, and they had to remove his colon, and he now has a colostomy bag (which he really didn't want). After that surgery, he was extremely weak and out of it. Two days later, after a routine test, they saw something they didn't like, so they opened him up to make sure nothing was leaking. Luckily, they didn't find anything wrong that time, but put in a drain to be safe, and hopefully help the wound heal faster/better this time.
After that surgery, he really hasn't been the same. He was extremely weak, could barely speak or open his eyes. It took weeks for him to begin talking again. He knew who everyone was, and was talking to us, but then he'd start talking about weird/random things, not making any sense to anybody except himself. He would get frustrated because we didn't understand him, he'd get agitated really easily. He kept saying he wanted to die, they put him on drugs for depression. He was refusing to eat any food, so they eventually had to put in a feeding tube.
That was last week. The infection had cleared up. He was doing better, aside from having the feeding tube, so they released him from the hospital and send him back to the physical therapy place to get walking again. He was there since Friday. The night he was admitted there, after FMIL left, he freaked out, yelling that he had been struck by lightning, and that he was going to murder the nurse, so they immediately transferred him to the Dementia ward. (keep in mind, he was completely normal mentally before all of this happened).
Anyway, when the doctor put in the feeding tube, he must've seen something suspicious in his esophagus, so they did a biopsy. (they had done biopsies in the past when they did the colonoscopy and the surgery and had never found anything). Well FMIL just got the call tonight - they found cancer in his esophagus.
As of now, we have no details as far as what type of cancer it is, or what stage it is, but needless to say, its not good. FFIL is 73 years old, he's been through hell with all of these surgeries (going back to Mother's day), he is still very weak, malnourished, etc. We really don't know if he'd be able to physically handle another surgery - even if the cancerous tumor could be removed that easily. God forbid he needs chemo or radiation, we really don't know if he'd be able to survive that
Its been a roller coster ride, and very difficult going through all of this. I've been trying to be supportive of FI through all of this (even though I don't agree with all of the things that FMIL has been doing through all of this). It has definitely been putting a strain on our relationship. At dinner tonight, before we heard about the cancer, FI was saying he really didn't think his father would be able to be at our wedding, and that he didn't even know if he'd still be alive by September
Please keep him in your prayers for us. I will keep you all updated.
Thanks...