Bachelorette problem

Re: Bachelorette problem

• JoanE2012 member

  

  January 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bachelorette-problem?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e0e4af1a-3d93-4f29-96db-ca64f205f2bbPost:9c4ddad1-366c-4594-a650-33afad729e57">Bachelorette problem</a>:
  [QUOTE]I have 6 girls in my wedding party, my sisters, my 2 best friends and my fsil.  I wanted her to stand on fi's side but he didn't like the idea of mixed gender sides so I asked her.  She has nothing in common with my friends or sisters.  My sister (MOH) is starting to plan the bachelorette and I don't really want fsil there... she barely knows any of the other wedding party or any of my friends and I don't think she would have a good time anyway.  So I was thinking I could have a low key bachelorette lunch with everyone, and then the rest of us would go to a bigger bachelorette thing the weekend after?  I feel a little bad lying to her but I don't think she would want to be there seeing as she doesn't really know any of my friends.
  Posted by morganne1984[/QUOTE]
  
  1.  Mixed gender wedding parties is pretty common.  Your fiance was wrong to deny her.
  2.  If YOU want FSIL in party, she should be on your side. 
  3.  It is incredibly rude to not include her in other festivities because she doesn't know the others.  Have a little faith that she can make small talk with the others and have a good time. 

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• banana468 member

  

  January 2013

  I would find it really rude as your FSIL if I was lied to.
  
  She may decline attending a bachelorette or she may have a great time.   Let HER be the one to decide that.

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• NYCMercedes member

  

  January 2013

  Please don't lie to her or exclude her. Maybe she will make friends with you or your friends.

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• AddieCake member

  

  January 2013

  If you don't even want her to go out for a girl's night, why did you want her standing up in your wedding? You don't ask people to be in your WP that aren't your nearest and dearest just for the sake of asking people you feel obligated to ask. That ship has sailed, however, and it would be rude not to invite her to the party.

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• Simply Fated member

  

  January 2013

  That's really "mean girls" to exclude her like that.

  
  

  Your fiance was ridiculous and somewhat sexist to deny her a spot on his side. But that's over and done with.

  You invited her to be on your side. you should include her to the fullest extent and not exclude her because she's an outsider.

  
  

  If she'll really be uncomfortable, then maybe she won't come, anyway. but as the bride and her future SIL you should try to make her feel comfortable. 

  
  

  If you really want to go out with just some of your friends and sisters, do it. But don't make it a sooper speshul secret second bachelorette party. 

  
  

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• loca4pook member

  

  January 2013

  Keep in mind, this woman will be in your life for the rest of your life. Don't do anything rude now as it might make the next 50 years or so painful.
  
  I would include her. she may choose to deline if she isn't comfortable.

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• melb2013 member

  

  January 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bachelorette-problem?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:e0e4af1a-3d93-4f29-96db-ca64f205f2bbPost:47e58e9d-44dc-4440-a18e-ca5dc9b3c68e">Re: Bachelorette problem</a>:
  [QUOTE]Keep in mind, this woman will be in your life for the rest of your life. Don't do anything rude now as it might make the next 50 years or so painful. I would include her. she may choose to deline if she isn't comfortable.
  Posted by loca4pook[/QUOTE]<div>
  </div><div>This.  You should be going out of your way to make an effort to create a relationship with her- not trying to slight her.
  
  </div>

  May 2013 February Siggy: Invitations

  

  

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• nikole712 member

  

  January 2013

  Do not exclude her, that is extremely rude and would hurt her feelings. Ask her and let her decide if she wants to join you or not. It may be a good opportunity for you to bond with her and for her to make some new friends!

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