Is it ok to register for a honeymoon?

mpelosi520 · July 2010

I've had friends tell me that there are websites out there that you can use to register for your honeymoon and your guests just log on and contribute to your trip. Is that ok to do? Is that really greedy or tacky? I'm not sure we can afford a honeymoon otherwise and I think it's more tacky to ask for a "green back" wedding. We have been living together for 6 years and we've got all the household items a couple would normally register for. help?

maratea · July 2010

You'll find that a lot of people on this board are against honeymoon registries. And just like you said, it's kind of tacky to ask someone else to pay for a trip you really can't afford. Several HM registry sites take a cut of the money your guests give, so you're really only getting 98% of the money. So you could just not register, or create a small home-item registry (upgrade your sheets or towels, etc.), then hope people give you money which you could put toward a HM.

quotequeen · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_ok-register-honeymoon?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:aaf01c05-b8dc-4429-83e9-e5be4b0d7b22Post:770c1f72-b8ed-40b9-949e-7b6ce80cc679">Is it ok to register for a honeymoon?</a>:
[QUOTE]I've had friends tell me that there are websites out there that you can use to register for your honeymoon and your guests just log on and contribute to your trip. Is that ok to do? Is that really greedy or tacky? I'm not sure we can afford a honeymoon otherwise and I think it's more tacky to ask for a "green back" wedding. We have been living together for 6 years and we've got all the household items a couple would normally register for. help?
Posted by mpelosi520[/QUOTE]

You can't plan a honeymoon that you can't otherwise afford banking on other people to fund it for you. Some people think honeymoon registries are really tacky and others think they're fine, but it sounds like you have no idea which camp your guests fall into so you should stay away from them. Asking directly for money is worse, yes, but that doesn't make the honeymoon registry ok when it's pretty much the equivalent. The only difference is that you fool your guests into thinking they're buying you excursions or something, but with most of these you just get a check that you can use for whatever you want.

If you don't want to register then don't. Many people will give you cash and you can put it toward a trip later if you so choose.

trix1223 · July 2010

IMO, no it's not okay. Asking people to pay for a vacation is a whole 'nother ballgame than registering for dishes that you'll use every day. At least IMO.

And I would never plan a vacation with the hope that my guests will pay for it. That's just asking for trouble.

MNVegas · July 2010

Asking for cash from you guests is never appropriate no matter how you spin it, not to mention that most HM registries are deceitful to you guests and take a cut of the money.

Do a small registry for people who want to do box gifts. Others will give cash gifts directly to you and you can use that money towards your HM. If someone asks you or wedding party, you can say you are registered at X store but also saving for HM. People will get the hint.

Patineuse1124 · July 2010

I think HM registries are fine, and we have one on www.honeyfund.com. However, I think it is a good idea to have at least a small regular registry for those who like to give a physical gift (we registered at BB&B as well). Also, it's not really a good idea to register for a HM you couldn't afford on your own. If nobody contributed, you'd be SOL, so be sure you can at least afford transportation, accommodations, food, and a few activities. (I think this rule also applies to regular registries. If you can't afford the china pattern you are registering for, what will you do when 7 of 12 of your dishes, 10 of 12 of your stemware and 3 of 12 of your flatware gets purchased?).

Since a few of your friends mentioned it to you, it sounds like your social circle does not mind them, and for those that do mind, nobody has to give you something from it (or any gift at all), it is simply a wish list (as is a regular registry). Some registries, take a %, but honeyfund does not. And IMO it is not any more deceitful than regular registries, it all depends on you, the creator of the registry. I've heard of other knotties registering for things with plans to just return the items to get the cash for something else. So if you add something to the HM registry be sure you really want to, and will do it.

strlzfan11 · July 2010

I think they're rude, but that's just my opinion. I think asking people to pay for a trip you otherwise cannot afford is the same as asking your parents (or someone else) to pay for a wedding that you cannot afford on your own.

trix1223 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_ok-register-honeymoon?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:aaf01c05-b8dc-4429-83e9-e5be4b0d7b22Post:3702c32e-ba9a-43f8-a057-71412d7fc6db">Re: Is it ok to register for a honeymoon?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think they're rude, but that's just my opinion. I think asking people to pay for a trip you otherwise cannot afford is the same as asking your parents (or someone else) to pay for a wedding that you cannot afford on your own.
Posted by strlzfan11[/QUOTE]

That's the best explanation I've heard. Well said, strlzfan!

Is it ok to register for a honeymoon?

Re: Is it ok to register for a honeymoon?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards