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May 2012 Weddings

Bad excuses (vent)

My aunt and uncle RSVP'd no, which I was fine with...until my mom revealed their excuse.  They aren't coming because they can't find anyone to watch their dogs.  I understand if you don't want to kennel your dogs for 2-3 days (I wouldn't do that with my dog, either), but we always manage to find someone willing to watch her.  Most of the time we just exchange a favor with the sitter (i.e. watching their kids for a night).  It hurts my feelings that they can't ask some family members or friends to watch the dogs...but I guarantee they didn't even try to ask anyone.  (I know my aunt, and she has a lot of excuses for why she can't do things or go places...she pulls this stuff my my mom, i.e. her sister, all the time.)  I know I'm being selfish here, but a LOT of my side of the family isn't coming and I feel like I'll be embarrassed at the wedding because none of my family will be there. :(

Re: Bad excuses (vent)

  • I am so sorry! I would feel the same way. I mean, I love my cats and wouldn't want to board them while we were traveling, but we could at least find someone to take care of them while we were gone, especially for a family members wedding.

    Don't worry about the family that won't be going, focus on the family that is :) When FI and I actually went down the list of family, friends, and parents friends.... we only cared to have about 30 people there, and our guest list is 130. 
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  • mandydc0509mandydc0509 member
    500 Comments
    edited March 2012
    I feel like I will be in the same boat. My FI's family is SUPER excited about the wedding and have been planning to come since we announced the date. However, my family is more spread out, a lot of them are older... And then I have people like my aunt that skip showers for retirement seminars... It sounds like our aunts would get along b/c mine likes to make up lame excuses to miss stuff also.

    What I figure is, the people who show up are the people who care the most (aside from the ppl who genuinely can't come b/c of health issues, etc), and those are the kind of people I want to be there. It's not a competition :)

    But yeah, I don't believe that they couldn't find someone to watch their dogs. Lame.
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  • Don't worry, I've secretly felt the same way about some RSVPs.  I think it's natural to be disappointed when people close to you miss such a big event (probably the biggest day of our lives!), but it's really disappointing when it's for a silly reason.  I'd feel the same way - they can't find someone to watch their dogs for a couple of days?  Or bring them with and stay in a pet friendly hotel?  Lame.

    For us, one is FI's cousin, who we were considering asking to be a reader.  He lives about 3.5 hours away, but apparently they are going to another wedding that day.  We haven't really asked the details, but since they are family we know that no one else in FI's family is getting married.  At first I told myself it was a money issue for them (gas & hotel), but apparently they are traveling to FSIL's wedding reception later in the summer (the same distance away and will require a hotel stay).  Not to sound like a snob, but it isn't even a wedding!  They were married last year and are now having a casual party to celebrate.  I guess I'm just disappointed because I know that FI and his cousin are close and my FI is really disappointed they chose not to come.

    The other is one of my mom's close friends - I know my mom was really disappointed when she found out she wasn't going to be there.  And she's skipping my wedding to go to a graduation party for her daughter's boyfriend.
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  • I know how you feel!! My dad is coming from Houston to PA but my step-mother is not coming because they have 3 dogs....lame!! Don't have so many fricken animals if you can't ever leave your house for family functions!! My step-mom has family close to them too, so they could have found someone to watch them
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  • my family isnt coming either. well alot of them arent coming anyways. 12 of the 13 rsvp's have been from my family and my adopted moms on the fence she's not sure if she'll go or not. I was very bummed but i realized that im much happier if the ones who dont want to be there dont come because if they do theyll ruin the night.

     try not to let it get you down. the day isnt about them its about you and your fiances new life together and your commitment to each other. 

    I know easier said then done...
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_bad-excuses-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:13391b82-7692-4ee6-8898-5dee9a93b1b5Post:f2af29ba-db34-4c90-afdf-1703cc528f1f">Re: Bad excuses (vent)</a>:
    [QUOTE]I know how you feel!! My dad is coming from Houston to PA but <strong>my step-mother is not coming because they have 3 dogs</strong>....lame!! Don't have so many fricken animals if you can't ever leave your house for family functions!! My step-mom has family close to them too, so they could have found someone to watch them
    Posted by mdoyle1217[/QUOTE]


    that sounds like some crap my stepmom would pull---get this.  called my dad the other day to invite him to the tasting and he asked me when i was mailing out the invitations.  told him i had 2 weeks ago.  then, he asked my stepmom if they had received it and she told him no--he found it in her car later that day!  awesome.  is it bad i kinda hopes she doesn't come.  i mean, wtf was that!!!
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  • Yeah, we've had a few of those too. FI's parents' best friends aren't coming ... I guess it's a fairly decent excuse (they live in Hawaii), but still, they rarely see each other. I know FI's parents are disappointed that they're good friends won't be there.
  • That's pretty lame. We have 2 sitters, a kennel and a FI's parents for our furbaby for when we need to go away. I feel like having someone (or multiple people) available to watch your pet is part of being a good pet parent. What if something happened and they needed to be away from their house? ... that's my rant about why your Uncle and Aunt's excuse is lame. 

    It sucks but what can you do? They're the ones who are going to miss out on your awesome wedding! 
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  • Thanks, ladies!  I know I can always count on my fellow May brides to make me feel better :)
  • I am glad to read this because I was starting to feel a little tiffed about people not coming but I guess in the long run whoever wants to be will be and it will be a great day no matter! :)
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  • We have 2 dogs and to be honest it always ticks me off when someone is like, "just kennel them" b/c our dogs are our kids and 1 gets sever anxiety when she's keeneled which triggers a whole bunch of medical problems...

     I know you are not saying that at all-- i just needed to get that out there. Moving on, we too utilize family puppy sitters as well as doggy daycare options occasionally...then if those don't work...we get a puppy-ok hotel. If you really want to mess with them you should call them and tell them that you can block a puppy-friendly hotel room for them, lol.
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  • I know it is sometimes hard to find people to watch our two big furbabies, but when push comes to shove, for family -- I'm there.  Wow...I would be upset too.  I know FI and I have turned down things because of our dogs, but not a wedding.  I'm sorry.  Just enjoy the family/friends that will be at your wedding.  They are there because they want to be and want to celebrate with the two of you. 


    Side note:  Jennifercampbell what is that all about with your step-mom.  Did she think the wedding was going to go unnoticed and therefore and invite would to?  Good grief!
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  • edited March 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_bad-excuses-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:13391b82-7692-4ee6-8898-5dee9a93b1b5Post:0f167212-6d35-4732-b18a-e34cbcea44b7">Re: Bad excuses (vent)</a>:
    [QUOTE]We have 2 dogs and to be honest it always ticks me off when someone is like, "just kennel them" b/c our dogs are our kids and 1 gets sever anxiety when she's keeneled which triggers a whole bunch of medical problems...  I know you are not saying that at all-- i just needed to get that out there. Moving on, we too utilize family puppy sitters as well as doggy daycare options occasionally...then if those don't work...we get a puppy-ok hotel. If you really want to mess with them you should call them and tell them that you can block a puppy-friendly hotel room for them, lol.
    Posted by S0095042[/QUOTE]

    Aw, poor puppy!  Our dog gets crazy when we leave her alone, even if we just run to the store for 10 minutes...she's so attached!  lol I would feel terrible leaving her in a kennel, so I totally understand not wanting to do that.  I should totally call and tell them that! hahaha
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_bad-excuses-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:13391b82-7692-4ee6-8898-5dee9a93b1b5Post:69c0b695-7ff4-4b6d-b435-4206a21ea794">Re: Bad excuses (vent)</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bad excuses (vent) : Aw, poor puppy!  Our dog gets crazy when we leave her alone, even if we just run to the store for 10 minutes...she's so attached!  lol I would feel terrible leaving her in a kennel, so I totally understand not wanting to do that.  I should totally call and tell them that! hahaha
    Posted by gpapale1[/QUOTE]


    you should totally do it! lol  :)
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